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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Mighty Veil" data-source="post: 4016628" data-attributes="member: 30559">Let's make our own Dwarf myth and use that instead.El Morando (I'm taking Spanish lessons!) created dwarves after an all-nighter of binge drinking. The Titans asked Senior Morando to pay his tab but he refused! This is why to this day dwarves like to drink beer and are greedy. Eventually Chico Morando was refused into the heavenly pub, due to his unpaid bills. He went looking for his gold and gems; but being a eccentric god, he had hidden and buried his treasure in mountains. This is why treasure is found in dungeons and caves (monsters are just there by accident). He told his children, the dwarves, who were called back then "Shakar-Nakas'qas" (the people folk of the proud), to search for his loot! This is why dwarves like to mine. But the titans were inpatient, so Morando  told them his Shakar-Nakas'qas would simply work off the tab. They were sold eventually to the giants from Mui Grande-fey, who used them as slaves since their previous slaves The Githyanki ~!! had escaped with 12 other tribes under the leadership of a Mindflayer named Gith'moses. But that's another story to be explored in Monster Manual II, coming March 2009!Morando was too drunk to hear their cries. The other tribe of dwarves, the ones not given to the titans. The ones who were digging and minning. They found Morando's lost treasure and called to him. When he didn't answer (because he was past out) they just kept digging. Digging and digging. Until they dug so far they turned into Dueger dwarves and became evil and corrupted and hated Morando for being a drunk. They were no longer one with the Shakar-Nakas'qas. They had become The Goey'Ra'Aaka'Yys (the people who hate Morando because he made us dig and dig and dig), also called the Gray Folk Dwarfs Folk, or Thundarquestalolitas for short. Then one day the greatest dwarf of all, Billy Dwarf, saw the giants drinking beer and playing poker with gold coins. This made him remember that the Shakar-Nakas'qas enjoyed drinking beer and gold. The revolt started and ended 14 minutes later. After the Shakar-Nakas'qas renamed themselves the Dwarves in Billy's honor. Billy Dwarf did not survive the night, as he choked on his vomit after passing out from drinking too much wine. This is why dwarves drink beer and never wine, except dwarves who are straight edge (they drink tea and never coffee!). Oh, and this why dwarves and giants are enemies... and along the way goblins and orcs managed to piss off the dwarves too. And this is why dwarves and orcs and goblins hate each other.</blockquote>

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