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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Zhaneel" data-source="post: 1630907" data-attributes="member: 15829">BerandorInteresting story.  I am left feeling a little confused.  Basically, I got very early on that Robert was either a clone or a Robot.  I'm a loss as to how he misunderstood his name tag and as to what his truly programming was supposed to accomplish.  There were several miscellaneous things that jolted me out of the story [how can something be futuristic if we don’t know what the present is like?, it hard to be bossy while asking a question, rough transition from the Motel to the Apartments, can't ride/drive a motorcycle with someone in front of you & the laws around motorcycles, etc.].The picture use was pretty good, in my opinion.  I loved the eye and the car photos.  The leaping photo was a pretty visual, but not something I thought was essential to the story.  As for the black dot picture, given how tough it was I give you major props for having it be a recurring image.Brief nit pick: Dialogue punctuation is as follows:"What are you saying?" asked Rose.  The stuff inside gets the question mark, no comma, and the end of the sentence gets a period.The ending was chilly, but at the same time I felt a little sudden.  We didn't see Robot/Robert I go down and so the switch and being told [not shown] that the robot was down was a little odd.The constant use of He early on grated, even though there was a good reason.  I liked, however, that you didn't start using Robert until he knew what he looked like.  Small smiles happened when you made reference to the writer's trick of the main character not knowing his identity.  Another old hat trick, however, is the use of the mirror for description, just FYI.All in all good story.  Some room for improvement, but there always is for Ceramic DM.</blockquote>

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