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<blockquote data-quote="yangnome" data-source="post: 1638902" data-attributes="member: 7413">I agree with your comments.&nbsp; The end felt really rushed, and tacked on to me as well and I wanted some more time to work with it and get it right.&nbsp; Unfortunately due to the mix up withthe posting of the pictures, I didn't have enough time to work with the story.&nbsp; I worked all weekend, so I pretty much just wound up with Friday night.&nbsp; The end of the story had to be rushed during breaks at work and IMO it really shows.&nbsp; I'll likely go back and try to rework the ending later.&nbsp; I really need to expand on David's rantings and the rituals that the group conducts.&nbsp; I also want to expand a bit on his memory of his mother and her problems with the cult he joined.&nbsp; I also think I really lost the feel of the story I was trying to accomplish as I was rushed.&nbsp; It wouldn't suprise me if the reader were able to read hte story and point to exactly where I left off Friday night.As for David coming in during the story, I had given the idea some thought.&nbsp; I decided to leave it a little ambiguous though, just showing hte change in the stack of books on the desk and the light that had been turned on while the narrator was asleep.All in all, I pretty much agree with your comments whole cloth.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="yangnome, post: 1638902, member: 7413"] I agree with your comments. The end felt really rushed, and tacked on to me as well and I wanted some more time to work with it and get it right. Unfortunately due to the mix up withthe posting of the pictures, I didn't have enough time to work with the story. I worked all weekend, so I pretty much just wound up with Friday night. The end of the story had to be rushed during breaks at work and IMO it really shows. I'll likely go back and try to rework the ending later. I really need to expand on David's rantings and the rituals that the group conducts. I also want to expand a bit on his memory of his mother and her problems with the cult he joined. I also think I really lost the feel of the story I was trying to accomplish as I was rushed. It wouldn't suprise me if the reader were able to read hte story and point to exactly where I left off Friday night. As for David coming in during the story, I had given the idea some thought. I decided to leave it a little ambiguous though, just showing hte change in the stack of books on the desk and the light that had been turned on while the narrator was asleep. All in all, I pretty much agree with your comments whole cloth. [/QUOTE]

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