Upgrade your account to a Community Supporter account and remove most of the site ads.
Rocket your D&D 5E and Level Up: Advanced 5E games into space! Alpha Star Magazine Is Launching... Right Now!

Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="Lockridge" data-source="post: 3682257" data-attributes="member: 43850">It was all a blur.Keep encouraging her and telling her she's doing well.Encourage her to do the prenatal exercizes.  Kedgells(?) are very important if she is going to go through a day without peeing everytime she laughs.As already stated, get rest and eat.  You will need it.  The doctors and nurses will take care of your wife so you need to take care of yourself.One thing we did was to buy a freezer.  We then made several casseroles and other frozen dishes as well as stocked up on dry goods for the pantry before the baby was born.  This meant that we didn't have to worry about cooking for a while.Accept help.Learn to tell the relatives and freinds to leave.  Too many people in the house in the first few days is too stressful for you and your wife.  Also, turn off any phones near the baby's room.  Given your sleep times, you may wish to turn down all the ringers.Hire a maid to clean the house for a couple of weeks (or have a relative do some work).You may want to think about using a midwife although you sound too far along at this point.  A doolah (spelt wrong) may also help coach your wife during labour.Buy and read a book.  I recommend "The Birth Partner, Second Edition" by Penny Simkin.  Best $20 you'll spend.As for the first few months of the baby's life:  Nothing follows the textbook.  Do not look to books or other's advice as anything more than a very rough guideline.  Your baby will vary on everything including teething, eating, when they will start to crawl, when they will smile - everything varies.Babies cry.  Thats it.  Your baby will cry.  There will be times that you will get frustrated - deal with it and remember that this is normal but don't lash out (not that you would, but just saying)This next part is my very strong opinion:Babies this young do not understand discipline or yelling.  Also, they have no motor control.  Sometimes things that they do which you may interpret as misbehaving is simply very bad motor control.  Take a deep breath and realize that.I want to emphasize the fact that babies this young (up to about a year - you'll know) cannot be disciplined.  There is no right or wrong to them.  Many people cannot fathom the blank slate that babies are.  They won't make the connection between daddy hitting them and them trying to put their fingers in the sockets.  If they do something wrong, tell them, shake your head and remove them from the object of wrongness.  Do not administer punishment - they won't get it.Breastfeeding:It is different for every woman.  Around here, women are strongly encouraged to breastfeed.  Some are successful and some are not through no fault of their own.Breastfeeding is a LEARNED process for both mother and child.  A mother should try it but not to the point of starving her child or ruining her emotional health.  Many mothers who fail to breastfeed feel a great deal of guilt and fall into tears over it.Our midwife encouraged my wife to breastfeed.  She tried very hard but just didn't produce very much so our child was always hungry.  Looking back on it we should have just went with the bottle.  When I think of my crying little girl looking up at me...Now I know she was hungry.  We spent money on a breastfeeding therapist and pumps and it was all wasted.I am in favour of breastfeeding but don't let anyone tell you what you should do if you think it is not working.Both of you should get used to crying.  Tears will be of both frustration and elation.Baby proof your house.  Babies will try to go down stairs.Money:Simplest is best.  We wasted a lot of money on the best "this and that".  Very often the simplest things are best.  Forget baby electronics as well.  It just costs more and babies don't notice it.  Look at the recent toy recall - all fancy plastic toys.  Our girl's favourite toy are wooden blocks - WOODEN BLOCKS!  They cost a few dollars.Same with strollers and car seats.If you're like me though you'll likely ignore this advice and spend money on the best only to realize later that most expensive is not the best.HAVE A DATE NIGHT.  Get a friend, or relative to babysit once in a while.  VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU TWO GET A BREAK.Ok, thats all I can think of for now.</blockquote>

Verification