Top n Random Useless/Bizarre Dungeon Items

[demiurge1138]

I figured I had better put in one of these lists at some point...
1) A small stuffed crocodile, about four feet in length. It has a continual light spell cast on its belly, and is hanging from a celing.

2) A box marked "Frosted Unlucky Charms". They detect for artifact levels of magic and evil, but their only unusual power is that they stay crunchy in milk.

3) Proteo-Meat. This can claims to contain a meat that tastes like anyhting, provided with the proper condiments and preparation. It also warns the user to never, ever eat it raw...

4) A small glob of ooze that smells absolutly delicious. It tastes like toast, and reproduces rapidly in acidic environments.

Sorry about the dearth of food-based items. Please, post more!
Demiurge out.

 

[Skade]

5) Collection of goblin ears, arranged by size and color
6) clay figurine of a large orc, hollow and marred by an open slit on its back
7) pastel chalk paintings of dragons and wyverns against a sunset, for that Southwestron look

 

[WanderingMonster]

8) A small balloon made from some sort of animal bladder. It is labelled "Imp Flatus".

9) A magical pin that will hold a piece of parchment on a wall forever (A Tack of Up Eternity)

10) A vial of small blue pills. It requires an Open Lock check to figure out how to open the cap. The body of the vial is inscribed with the undercommon phrase, "TENTAGRA. One tablet as needed to maintain extraction. A Schedule II illithid drug."

 

[Piratecat]

1) A small stuffed crocodile, about four feet in length... hanging from a celing.

Most people don't know it, but in my campaign a stuffed crocodile or alligator (commonly called a corkindril) hanging from the ceiling gives a +2 circumstance bonus to alchemy checks. I mean, heck, there's got to be a reason why every single alchemy lab has one of these!

 

[WanderingMonster]

*bump*

11. An 8" strip of fresh beef. It is cursed and cannot be cured by any means short of a wish or miracle.

12. A corpse stripped of everything but it's left boot. Chuckle menacingly and say, "It appears that something sinister is afoot."

13. A large glass lens that is 12" in diameter resting at the bottom of a large dish full of warm salty water. Ten smaller lenses are also in the dish.

 

[alsih2o]

2" wide ring gates that only function when worn as earings.

 

[Iron_Chef]

2" wide ring gates that only function when worn as earings.

In one ear and out the other, LOL.

 

[Sejs]

Ladies and Gentlemen, for your amusement - something that's right up this particular thread's alley:


Warehouse 23.

 

[alsih2o]

Ladies and Gentlemen, for your amusement - something that's right up this particular thread's alley:


Warehouse 23.

You open one of the 993 boxes on this floor and find...
A thin ring made of ruddy gold. Inside are letters in an ancient script which, if deciphered, will read "Factory Second." It is, in fact, the Other True Ring. Its wearer will feel no effect other than a vague sense that exciting things are happening somewhere else, to other people.

 

[Crothian]

Ladies and Gentlemen, for your amusement - something that's right up this particular thread's alley:


Warehouse 23.

That's really cool. Some great ideas for a Modern game there.