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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Ankh-Morpork Guard" data-source="post: 1719192" data-attributes="member: 10079">Truthfully, I tried this for a day or two...didn't work. Just made things worse. I think I was trying it again when I first posted this thread. In fact, I tried AGAIN earlier today. Its really not worth it...hard to fight off when it hits, but I've managed it a few times so far so I think I can keep doing it.1. Do have means of support. I've got a good amount of friends here willing to help(if I can contact them), and this family is doing their best for me whether I want the help or not. At the same time, once I get my Student Visa I can work, so I planned(and still plan to) work to supporting myself.2. Solid plans are pointless, they always get ruined. I had vague plans, and actually...most of them are still there. While coming here for HER was very important(and still is to me), College is ALSO a big thing. I want to develop my skills as an artist and hopefully(eventually at least) teach others.3. Alright, truthfully that's probably the dumbest thing of all. I could ask my family back in the States and I COULD get back(hell, I bought round trip tickets since they were cheaper...I could go back December 2nd if I really wanted to).4. I know it sounds childish, but those few times we met were enough to know I wasn't crazy. I still know that I've done this for the right reasons, and that I'll just have to adapt to things whether I want to or not.5. Met her 8 years ago through playing XvT...started really talking to her about 5 years ago. For those five years, we talked on the phone for hours nearly every night. She gave up nearly all of her friends outside the internet just to speak with me. I'm not the only one who's had to make a lot of changes.6. I didn't know she'd cheated on me until after I'd gotten here.7. This should bother me more than it does. Young or not, this is the perfect thing to happen to her. She needs something stable in her life, and currently, I can't be that. Neither can the person she's 'with'. A child can, and will do that. It'll be very hard on her, but she'll have to deal with it.</blockquote>

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