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Message: <blockquote data-quote="barsoomcore" data-source="post: 590260" data-attributes="member: 812">Xarlen, I just want to add my bit of assurance to you, and a consideration I haven't seen anyone else mention.I would not have thought that an NPC driven mad by miscarriage would be considered offensive by a player, either. I likely would have fallen into exactly the same issue you have, even though I'm older than your player.Not because I don't think miscarriage is a horrible, painful thing. Of course it is. But, well, I guess I feel that including such a painful event in an NPC's background just isn't likely to offend anyone. Many of my NPC's have similar, or even much worse, things in their backgrounds.Most people I know in my life have very painful events in their pasts. These are usually formative events for people in the real world. When trying to create memorable and believable characters, I find I am unable to avoid giving them grief-stricken backgrounds. Were I to expunge all references to things my players might potentially find painful, I would be mighty restricted in my NPC creation.I would certainly not hesitate to create an NPC with a similar background, that's what I'm saying.There's also the question of how the NPC was played by you. That can be another source of offensiveness to a player, I think. Perhaps you were particularly ham-handed in your presentation and turned what should have been a painful but honest piece of story-telling into an insulting cartoon of emotional manipulation. I wasn't there and so can't comment, but that's another danger of "mature" subject matter in games -- as a DM you have to be able to not just think this stuff up but communicate it believably and sensitively.It's something that we as DMs have to always consider -- are we going to be able to play this NPC or describe that particular outrage of evil?I am sorry for the pain you inadverdantly caused your player and I hope that your game is improved rather than weakened by this. I am not in "This is just silly entertainment" camp on RPGs -- I do believe that real and important stories can be told this way. It's just hard, that's all. Good for you for trying. You'll do a better job next time, I'm sure.</blockquote>

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