toucanbuzz
No rule is inviolate
I was recovering some old gaming material I used to have on defunct Google Sites and came across this. Not sure where it began:
1. Leap into water without removing anything, always.
2. Pretty good with meeting new guys and giving them an old dead teammate’s stuff.
3. Re-checking after being absolutely sure they didn’t find any traps. Just in case...
4. When invited over for a sumptuous dinner, they refuse to partake in the feast and eat the journey bread they brought instead.
5. No adventurer worth their codpiece ever wastes time on minor social niceties like having a bath before attending the royal ball in court finery.
6. 90% of adventurers wielding their family blade steeped in centuries of history and tradition, wielded by their ancestors for a dozen generations shall toss it in the nearest bin as soon as they get something magical.
7. Capable of having multiple minute conversations in the middle of combat, discussing tactics in plain, clear, and concise language in front of enemies, who merely pause mid-battle and kindly await their stratagem's end before continuing the fight in no way applying their clear knowledge of said discussion.
8. Show no interest in personal comfort or normal human needs even though you're incredibly rich.
9. Carry all your personal possessions around with you at all times.
10. Do anything a stranger asks you to do on the assumption that it will somehow lead to wealth and power.
11. Never be even slightly bothered by the fact that your job often requires you to be stabbed, shot with arrows, or sprayed with deadly acid many times in a typical day.
12. Two years without a bowel movement and counting.
13. Wander around in the wilderness, hoping to get attacked.
14. When storming a castle, assume all enemies will remain in their rooms indefinitely instead of raising the alarm and then all attacking at once.
15. Make camp and rest for the night after casting a few spells, irrespective of the time of day and whether you're in hostile territory or on an urgent mission.
16. In a six-month time period go from an untried doofus to one of the most powerful mortal beings on the planet.
17. When they get sex changed, polymorphed into a bugbear, or suffer a similar calamitous change of their persona, they shrug and keep going...after all, naughty word happens.
18. Plunging headfirst in the dungeon of certain death is no problem, but getting invited by a friend to have dinner at his home causes tremendous trepidation. When invited to said dinner, will use all their ingenuity to smuggle weapons and armors inside their friend's home.
19. Never pray to deities unless they have divine class levels, as obviously those prayers would be unanswered and pointless.
20. Threats to their very lives will be dismissed or taken as a challenge, met head-on. Threats to their equipment will often force a panicked retreat.
21. Will dine on nothing but iron rations for weeks on end, without suffering any malnutrition effects, and show no desire for anything but the cheapest potato stews available at the cheapest inns.
22. Even if they sleep in fine rooms, they will likely all sleep in the same room, instead of taking personal rooms, and set up watches, even if the inn is well guarded, and in the center of the most secure, stable city in the realm, many miles from any sort of threat.
23. Carry dead friends around in a sack for weeks on end.
24. Attempt to put on suits of armor that were designed for a different gender and/or species.
25. Wander randomly around a town shopping while in full heavy plate mail armor with an overstuffed backpack and a dozen weapons; just in case trouble starts.
1. Leap into water without removing anything, always.
2. Pretty good with meeting new guys and giving them an old dead teammate’s stuff.
3. Re-checking after being absolutely sure they didn’t find any traps. Just in case...
4. When invited over for a sumptuous dinner, they refuse to partake in the feast and eat the journey bread they brought instead.
5. No adventurer worth their codpiece ever wastes time on minor social niceties like having a bath before attending the royal ball in court finery.
6. 90% of adventurers wielding their family blade steeped in centuries of history and tradition, wielded by their ancestors for a dozen generations shall toss it in the nearest bin as soon as they get something magical.
7. Capable of having multiple minute conversations in the middle of combat, discussing tactics in plain, clear, and concise language in front of enemies, who merely pause mid-battle and kindly await their stratagem's end before continuing the fight in no way applying their clear knowledge of said discussion.
8. Show no interest in personal comfort or normal human needs even though you're incredibly rich.
9. Carry all your personal possessions around with you at all times.
10. Do anything a stranger asks you to do on the assumption that it will somehow lead to wealth and power.
11. Never be even slightly bothered by the fact that your job often requires you to be stabbed, shot with arrows, or sprayed with deadly acid many times in a typical day.
12. Two years without a bowel movement and counting.
13. Wander around in the wilderness, hoping to get attacked.
14. When storming a castle, assume all enemies will remain in their rooms indefinitely instead of raising the alarm and then all attacking at once.
15. Make camp and rest for the night after casting a few spells, irrespective of the time of day and whether you're in hostile territory or on an urgent mission.
16. In a six-month time period go from an untried doofus to one of the most powerful mortal beings on the planet.
17. When they get sex changed, polymorphed into a bugbear, or suffer a similar calamitous change of their persona, they shrug and keep going...after all, naughty word happens.
18. Plunging headfirst in the dungeon of certain death is no problem, but getting invited by a friend to have dinner at his home causes tremendous trepidation. When invited to said dinner, will use all their ingenuity to smuggle weapons and armors inside their friend's home.
19. Never pray to deities unless they have divine class levels, as obviously those prayers would be unanswered and pointless.
20. Threats to their very lives will be dismissed or taken as a challenge, met head-on. Threats to their equipment will often force a panicked retreat.
21. Will dine on nothing but iron rations for weeks on end, without suffering any malnutrition effects, and show no desire for anything but the cheapest potato stews available at the cheapest inns.
22. Even if they sleep in fine rooms, they will likely all sleep in the same room, instead of taking personal rooms, and set up watches, even if the inn is well guarded, and in the center of the most secure, stable city in the realm, many miles from any sort of threat.
23. Carry dead friends around in a sack for weeks on end.
24. Attempt to put on suits of armor that were designed for a different gender and/or species.
25. Wander randomly around a town shopping while in full heavy plate mail armor with an overstuffed backpack and a dozen weapons; just in case trouble starts.
