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When Players don't respect the DM's rules - Help!
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<blockquote data-quote="Shadowslayer" data-source="post: 2887884" data-attributes="member: 8400"><p>OK, my advice would be, get the group together and hammer out some common rules. Is it core only, are certain supplements allowed? WHich ones? etc. And then go with that no matter who is DMing. (this is how my own group does it) The inexperienced DM will just have to come up to the challenge. (It's not rocket science...actually the EL/CR thing is an imperfect system whether its core only or wide open)</p><p></p><p>I disagree though, that its not an ego/control/authority issue. From where I'm sitting, thats exactly what it looks like. The OP said that it all ended up working out, but still had the niggling feeling that he'd been undermined. So never mind that it worked out in the end....it didn't work out HIS way, hence the post.</p><p></p><p>QUOTE </p><p>"However, I feel like I should not have caved. It's not about character stats, <strong>it's about this player not respecting me or my rules.</strong> I don't want to be unable to keep up with new material, especially new material from books I don't own.</p><p></p><p>The most awkward part is, the problem player hosts the games, so <strong>I don't feel like I can lay down the law as much as I'd like to.</strong> If necessary, I can probably see about someone else hosting the game, but I'd prefer not to do so." </p><p>UNQUOTE (emphasis mine)</p><p></p><p>Here you have a guy who would consider switching up the group and dumping one guy because he's not being afforded due respect? Oh yeah...it sounds like an ego thing.</p><p></p><p>ANyway, I'm just saying that I feel that some sort of group consensus is in order. As I said before, I have no way of knowing if the rest of the group embraced the core-only thing, or just merely went along with it. It could be that the other player was out of line. I don't have the whole story. Was the offending player guilty of wanting special treatment? I don't see that. I see that he just wanted to play the way the group had already established in prior campaigns.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shadowslayer, post: 2887884, member: 8400"] OK, my advice would be, get the group together and hammer out some common rules. Is it core only, are certain supplements allowed? WHich ones? etc. And then go with that no matter who is DMing. (this is how my own group does it) The inexperienced DM will just have to come up to the challenge. (It's not rocket science...actually the EL/CR thing is an imperfect system whether its core only or wide open) I disagree though, that its not an ego/control/authority issue. From where I'm sitting, thats exactly what it looks like. The OP said that it all ended up working out, but still had the niggling feeling that he'd been undermined. So never mind that it worked out in the end....it didn't work out HIS way, hence the post. QUOTE "However, I feel like I should not have caved. It's not about character stats, [B]it's about this player not respecting me or my rules.[/B] I don't want to be unable to keep up with new material, especially new material from books I don't own. The most awkward part is, the problem player hosts the games, so [B]I don't feel like I can lay down the law as much as I'd like to.[/B] If necessary, I can probably see about someone else hosting the game, but I'd prefer not to do so." UNQUOTE (emphasis mine) Here you have a guy who would consider switching up the group and dumping one guy because he's not being afforded due respect? Oh yeah...it sounds like an ego thing. ANyway, I'm just saying that I feel that some sort of group consensus is in order. As I said before, I have no way of knowing if the rest of the group embraced the core-only thing, or just merely went along with it. It could be that the other player was out of line. I don't have the whole story. Was the offending player guilty of wanting special treatment? I don't see that. I see that he just wanted to play the way the group had already established in prior campaigns. [/QUOTE]
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