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<blockquote data-quote="Thornir Alekeg" data-source="post: 2891228" data-attributes="member: 15651">I understand that a DM needs to be able to control what goes into the game and why.&nbsp; I do it myself when I DM.&nbsp; The point I was trying to make (maybe poorly) is that the approach to that control makes a big difference.&nbsp; When you delcare that people must check with you first, or that you have the right to remove something, the implication is that your needs as DM outweigh the player's needs when it comes to their character.&nbsp; If instead you request that players work with you to make sure you can fit their character concept into your world, you give the impression that their needs are as valid as yours are.&nbsp; Ultimately you may still end up removing something or not approving a character, but if you are working together, the player will hopefully fully understand the reasons why, and together you can find something that works for both of you.&nbsp; As for non-core rules, let the players know that is the reason why you are hesitant to allow other materials in.&nbsp; Let the players then make a case as to why what they want isn't that far out there.&nbsp; Together discuss concerns and do so again later if what you thought wasn't an issue appears to in fact be a problem. Too many DMs, IMO, feel that they should have ultimate control over everything that happens in their world.&nbsp; I don't agree.&nbsp; The players need to have a good amount of control over creation of their own characters because it is the one piece that gives them buy-in into your world.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Thornir Alekeg, post: 2891228, member: 15651"] I understand that a DM needs to be able to control what goes into the game and why. I do it myself when I DM. The point I was trying to make (maybe poorly) is that the approach to that control makes a big difference. When you delcare that people must check with you first, or that you have the right to remove something, the implication is that your needs as DM outweigh the player's needs when it comes to their character. If instead you request that players work with you to make sure you can fit their character concept into your world, you give the impression that their needs are as valid as yours are. Ultimately you may still end up removing something or not approving a character, but if you are working together, the player will hopefully fully understand the reasons why, and together you can find something that works for both of you. As for non-core rules, let the players know that is the reason why you are hesitant to allow other materials in. Let the players then make a case as to why what they want isn't that far out there. Together discuss concerns and do so again later if what you thought wasn't an issue appears to in fact be a problem. Too many DMs, IMO, feel that they should have ultimate control over everything that happens in their world. I don't agree. The players need to have a good amount of control over creation of their own characters because it is the one piece that gives them buy-in into your world. [/QUOTE]

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