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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Henry" data-source="post: 308694" data-attributes="member: 158">I've been through literally every cycle you named.First, is the resentment due to the hobby, or due to something else? I was once oblivious that I spent more time gaming with friends than I did with my wife (then, my girlfriend.) She had to point it out on a calendar to me to make me realize it. If you are gaming to the neglect of your family and outside social life, then there is a line that needs to be drawn, if you wish to include that person in your life. Find out if it is due to feelings of abandonment, or perhaps broken promises on your part, or some other self-caused neglect. In other words, make sure your OWN house is in order before you go down other avenues.Second, find out if it is something that your partner feels lacking. Perhaps your partner needs to look into some outside interests, as well. It is not so good to wrap everything into one person, to the exclusion of all others. Picking a gaming day is a perfect time to get a little distance from one another - because quite frankly, while every relationship needs unity, it also needs smatterings of distance, as well. My wife enjoys my game days, because she has said numerous times that if I never gamed, she'd blow my brains out. <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /> It's something that completes her, just like her hobbies do.I'm willing to bet that even gaming couples on these boards have some hobbies or activities that they do apart from one another.Third, people marry each other all over the world, thinking that they are going to "change" this person into something more suitable to them. NEWS FLASH: It ain't gonna happen. If that person wants to remain true to themselves, and happy in general, they shouldn't be forced to give up constructive things that are very important to them. Moderation is one thing, but alteration is something else altogether. If someone married you with the understanding that you have a hobby that you are passionate about, then IN NO CIRCUMSTANCE should you be expected to change who you are by giving it up.By the same token, anyone with religious convictions against RPG's should not get involved with someone who roleplays. You are then asking THAT person to change something fundamental to who they are, and you are asking for the same amount of trouble. There's nothing wrong with explaining to that person the truth about RPG's, but if you both go into a union diametrically opposed on a critical opinion like that one, then you are again asking for trouble.Finally, for anyone whose spouse is totally against gaming, just on its principle, ask them to roleplay, or ask them to sit in on a session, just to let them know what is going on. Sometimes, the mysterious aspect some people give to gaming is a detriment, and the spouse assumes something nefarious or not above-board is going on. Nothing dispels myths like empirical evidence.</blockquote>

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