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<blockquote data-quote="Raven Crowking" data-source="post: 4046663" data-attributes="member: 18280"><p>In this thread (<a href="http://www.enworld.org/showthread.php?t=218774&page=2)" target="_blank">http://www.enworld.org/showthread.php?t=218774&page=2)</a>, I wrote</p><p></p><p style="margin-left: 20px">I believe that everyone, whether they know it or not, has "deal breakers" where it comes to games (as well as other types of relationships). It is perfectly fair to say, "This isn't what I want from a game; this is a deal-breaker for me." It is perfectly fair to decide that something is a deal-breaker, and that it makes the game not worth playing. It is perfectly fair -- and mature -- not to compromise on things you believe are "deal breakers". You are under no obligation whatsoever to play in (or run) a game that you are not enjoying.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">However, the same is true for everyone at the table, including the DM. There really are cases where what the DM/other players want from the game is incompatable with what you want from the game. There really are cases where what you need "fixed" to make the game work for you is the very reason that everyone else is there. It is equally true that there really are things that need fixing in some games, because they are detracting from everyone's enjoyment -- including the DM's. Sometimes the DM just doesn't know what the problem is, or how to fix it.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">Talking about this stuff in a mature manner is, therefore, always valuable.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">Damaging the game because you are not enjoying it is not, IMHO, ever valuable. Leaving in the middle of a game is a tactic designed to damage the game, as is an attempt to sabotage the game to "force" an issue. IMHO, when you sit down to play you agree (like the hypocratic oath) "above all, to do no harm" intentionally to the game, no matter what chair you sit in (DM or player).</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">Violate that agreement, and I have no sympathy for you at all.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px">(And that is a general "you" that applies to anyone, not "you" in particular.)</p><p></p><p>That viewpoint certainly informs my response in this thread. In effect, the OP says that he has a player that is intentionally harming his game. Regardless of what the reason for that behaviour may be, it is never IMHO acceptable.</p><p></p><p>If someone says, in effect, "X is abusing my goodwill; what should I do?" my foremost answer will never be "What are you doing to invite that abuse?" Instead, I will always respond "End the abuse; thereafter, see what you part you might have played, and end that behaviour as well". If the AWP started this thread, complaining about the DM in question, my response would be the same -- if you think the situation is abusive, end it.</p><p></p><p>RC</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Raven Crowking, post: 4046663, member: 18280"] In this thread ([url]http://www.enworld.org/showthread.php?t=218774&page=2)[/url], I wrote [indent]I believe that everyone, whether they know it or not, has "deal breakers" where it comes to games (as well as other types of relationships). It is perfectly fair to say, "This isn't what I want from a game; this is a deal-breaker for me." It is perfectly fair to decide that something is a deal-breaker, and that it makes the game not worth playing. It is perfectly fair -- and mature -- not to compromise on things you believe are "deal breakers". You are under no obligation whatsoever to play in (or run) a game that you are not enjoying. However, the same is true for everyone at the table, including the DM. There really are cases where what the DM/other players want from the game is incompatable with what you want from the game. There really are cases where what you need "fixed" to make the game work for you is the very reason that everyone else is there. It is equally true that there really are things that need fixing in some games, because they are detracting from everyone's enjoyment -- including the DM's. Sometimes the DM just doesn't know what the problem is, or how to fix it. Talking about this stuff in a mature manner is, therefore, always valuable. Damaging the game because you are not enjoying it is not, IMHO, ever valuable. Leaving in the middle of a game is a tactic designed to damage the game, as is an attempt to sabotage the game to "force" an issue. IMHO, when you sit down to play you agree (like the hypocratic oath) "above all, to do no harm" intentionally to the game, no matter what chair you sit in (DM or player). Violate that agreement, and I have no sympathy for you at all. (And that is a general "you" that applies to anyone, not "you" in particular.)[/indent] That viewpoint certainly informs my response in this thread. In effect, the OP says that he has a player that is intentionally harming his game. Regardless of what the reason for that behaviour may be, it is never IMHO acceptable. If someone says, in effect, "X is abusing my goodwill; what should I do?" my foremost answer will never be "What are you doing to invite that abuse?" Instead, I will always respond "End the abuse; thereafter, see what you part you might have played, and end that behaviour as well". If the AWP started this thread, complaining about the DM in question, my response would be the same -- if you think the situation is abusive, end it. RC [/QUOTE]
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