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Message: <blockquote data-quote="scourger" data-source="post: 1560248" data-attributes="member: 12328">moderate & meetsI've lowered my expectations, separated my playing & DMing, and have come to a good place.  But it was a strange trip.For my weekly group, I used to have high expectations that resulted in successes and disappointments--sort of soaring highs and crashing lows.  That was fine for a while.  But then our group changed.  There were many factors, but the low point for me was when only 1 player out of 6 showed for a game I put on.  I ran the next game because I had committed to do so to myself, to the group and to a publisher (it was a playtest).  But, only 50% of the others showed overall.  I decided to leave off DMing for them for a while.  That was a year ago.  I think the problem boiled down to the fact that the only game on which we could all agree was D&D.  Any deviation from that game, no matter how slight and even other d20 fantasy games, brought out very selfish behavior with people just choosing not to participate.  I later called it the "player boycott" that I countered with my "DM embargo".  I stopped DMing in our weekly group.  There are a couple other DMs in the weekly group, so the D&D games went on.So, I started DMing on weekends as I had done several years back.  One of my oldest gaming buddies (and friend to at least half the weekly group) had moved back into town.  I started a mini-camapign with him and 2 other guys from the weekly group.  The rest were invited but declined.  Probably because it is a sci-fi game based on D&D d20 rules.  It was a lot of fun.  We haven't finished that mini-camapign yet, but we have another game going as well.  It has been difficult to find weekend time lately, but I am determined to finish that mini-campaign.  (Another post made me realize that I have never finished a campaing in nearly a quarter century of gaming.)Meanwhile, one of the weekly players dropped out.  About 6 months ago, our weekday group tried to get back on track.  I tried to get the aforementioned friend into the weekly group, but he was rejected.  That did not help my dilemma.  My attempt to remarry my playing with my DMing was frustrated.  So, it is status quo ante.Now, I am just trying to keep from putting all my eggs in one basket.  I considered dropping out of the weekly group to have more time for weekend gaming, but then I would be doomed to much DMing with little or no playing.  I still refuse to DM during the week, so I need the weekend games for the creative outlet of DMing even though it is increasingly difficult to schedule.  I wish I could find another group altogether or even some more weekend players, but all these people are my friends (some for many years (over 10)).  I don't think I would enjoy gaming with others as much.  I just decided not to let ayone bust my gaming groove.  I am actually now pretty happy playing once a week and DMing once a month.  I know time will bring more adjustments.  I hope the future will recombine my gaming into DMing plus playing in the same weekly group.  Also, as an aside, I have attended more conventions lately.  I went to a small gaming con 9 years ago in the town I used to live in.  I went to GenCon 2002.  I've been to 2 sci-fi cons this year in nearby cities.  The ones this year were sci-fi with some gaming.  Here again my expectations were low, but they were exceeded in both cases.  I could only get the one weekend gaming friend to go with me to the first con this year, and I went alone to the second.  But, as I said, nobody is going to bust my gaming groove.  I am very happy to know that I can enjoy convention gaming at a minimum if it comes down to it.</blockquote>

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