Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="Cleon" data-source="post: 8758638" data-attributes="member: 57383">Don't much care for that.Apart from some of the phrasing looking a bit clunky to me, shouldn't the first paragraph be the general description and the stuff about its origins be after it?Let's see…A lean bipedal dinosaur about the size of a large human. Clearly a predator, it is armed with long jaws lined with sharp teeth, clawed forelimbs and a great talon on each of its feet. When it opens its mouth, the reptile reveals it also has fangs and a forked tongue like a viper. The ti-khana deinonychus serves the yuan-ti in a manner similar to a trained dog: guarding the yuan-ti and their property or hunting their enemies. Some yuan-ti have these creatures turn into tiny vipers and carry them about, using the ti-khana as a powerful bodyguard they wear like jewelry.Creatures of the Yuan-ti. Over millenia of experimentation, the yuan-ti have transformed various scaly reptilian animals into monstrosities that share some of their traits. Called ti-khana, these prized pets are carefully trained to serve their ophidian masters. All ti-khana are resistant to magic like yuan-ti and possess the innate ability to detect magic. The majority of ti-khana also have venomous fangs, the ability to transform into a poisonous snake, and some kind of supernatural or magical attack. Ti-khana require the dark magic and alchemy of the yuan-ti to breed and develop their powers. Ti-khana can survive in the wild, but it is unlikely they can reproduce properly without the yuan-ti's arcane treatments. It is possible some types of ti-khana can mate with their unaltered relatives or lay viable eggs with their own kind. However, feral offspring can not develop ti-khana abilities without yuan-ti intervention so, at best, would grow into beasts resembling the ti-khana's mundane ancestors. Breeding and training ti-khana is usually performed by specialist yuan-ti spellcasters, but an edifice can be enchanted to perform this task for one or more strains of ti-khana. This allows ancient yuan-ti sites to have a population of ti-khana "guarddogs" even if no yuan-ti has visited them for millenia.Not sure about the last paragraphs. If you don't care for it I'd suggest using the following instead: Breeding and training ti-khana is usually performed by specialist yuan-ti spellcasters, but some important yuan-ti sites are guarded by permanent populations of ti-khana "guarddogs".</blockquote>

Verification