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I think how the oaths work in terms of where the power comes from is purposely designed to be table dependent: someone swears an oath, black box (the table dependent part) happens, and viola, you have a paladin. We can argue about the elegance and implications of a given table's black box, but I don't think anyone will find any evidence that one table's black box is more "right" than any others. This is one of those "rulings over rules" things.
Yeah, this. Nobody is going to "win" this argument.
My black box is that it would depend on the situation. I would rule that the Oath has to be sincere. An oath is not a deity, but there's tangible magic/power involved.
The Pact with the Patron, however, doesn't require any sincerity. There's only an assumption that the Patron believes your sincerity, at least at first.
If making the Pact doesn't conflict with the Oath I would allow it, at least at the start.
If keeping the Pact conflicts with the Oath there would be problems with Paladin powers.
If keeping the Oath conflicts with the Pact there would be problems with the Patron.
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