Paranoia O.R.C. and P.I.E. Full again

Thursday at 7ish pm somewhere in or around Gen Con

ATTENTION: All citizens of Alpha Complex ATTENTION

Alert Loyal Citizens. Alpha Complex is in danger. A group of O.R.C.s (Organized Red Communists) have stolen a P.I.E. (ACCESS DENIED). A group of six Troubleshooters is needed for this dangerous yet critical mission. A pair of loyal other citizens may also be assigned to offer additional aid as it is needed. While certain Troubleshooters may resemble certain characters from a treasonous non fun game like D&D these are all loyal citizens supported by the computer.

There are 8 player slots for the game. The first 6 are part of the trouble shooter team, the last two are experimental characters that may or may not be enjoyiable. But fun will be had by all. To not have fun would be treason.

What you need: a d20 and a pencil. Characters are provided.

Okay, here is the plan. We all meet a bit before 7pm at the ENnies booth outside the dealer room. If anyone wants to grab dinner together, that would make things easier. Buying the computer dinner is a great way to ensure that your clone gets specail treatment. Gifts are nice too. Once we are all together we hunt for a place to play. If while at Gen Con you notice a good place to play make a mental note of it. I have no idea how easy or hard it will be to locate a place.

Players:
Alenda
Shaylon
Piratecat
BelenUmeria
Xath
Rystil Arden
Thunderfoot
KidCthulhu

Team Leader: Piratecat
Loyality Officier:BelenUmeria
Equipment Person:Shaylon
Happiness Officier:Alenda
Hygeine Officier:Rystil Arden
Communications and Recording Officier:Xath
NPC1: Thunderfoot
NPC2: KidCthulhu

People in this game do not have to know Paranoia, in fact knowing the rules is treason. If you are new to Paranoia nad want to play I can e-mail you some information that will help you understand to some extent what it is all about. But be warned, full understanding is treason.

Alenda and I would not mind jumoing in on this one. Is this your Orc and Pie game or will you be running that one too? I thought Orc and Pie was more D&D related, but I could be wrong.

BelenUmeria said:

Alenda and I would not mind jumoing in on this one. Is this your Orc and Pie game or will you be running that one too? I thought Orc and Pie was more D&D related, but I could be wrong.

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Greeting fine Citizin!! (You'll get sick of this kind of talk really fast, trust me). In the days of the Old Reckoning times there was a prophet, treasonous as he was, Monte Cook. He invented a great adventure Orc and Pie. However, that was for the (non fun) game of D&D. To take the adventure to its true potential the Computer (me) has translated the game into the (fun) game of Paranoia. To keep true to the spirit of the adventure the computer has formed together a team of troubleshooters that at times can have the same feel and attitudes of player chacters from that (non fun) game. I know you comprehend this as to not comprehend would be treason. However, if any loyal citizens have questions, please feel free to post them and the Computer will answer them fully.

Crothian, I'd love to get in on this game, but am debating between the "happiness officer" and the "hygeine officer". Can you offer a little more background about what these officers do?

Edit: P.S. Is it OK that I've never played Paranoia?

Heh...I'd want to play the Loyalty officer.

Alenda said:

Crothian, I'd love to get in on this game, but am debating between the "happiness officer" and the "hygeine officer". Can you offer a little more background about what these officers do?

Edit: P.S. Is it OK that I've never played Paranoia?

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It's perferred that you never played before. People that have played suffer from the illusion they know what the game is. Being new the only delusions you'll have are the normal ones you carry around in every day life.

Team Leader

Congratulations, citizen! Because of your unique abilities you’ve been selected to serve as team leader. This is a vital assignment, and your selection demonstrates The Computer’s exceptional faith in you.
As team leader you must coordinate the efforts of your fellow Troubleshooters, using their diverse talents and skills to successfully complete your mission assignment. To this end, The Computer has provided you with all necessary equipment. However, if you feel The Computer may have overlooked some of your needs, please don’t hesitate to point this out.
At times your team may engage in combat with evil Commie mutant traitors. In such situations your superior tactical knowledge will determine the outcome of the battle. Deploy your team carefully. Keep those fire lanes clear!
Your badge depicts you as the center of your team, with your expertise and knowledge radiating as inspiration to all. The Computer stands ready to assist you in these tasks. Good luck, citizen! The sensors of The Computer are upon you.

Loyalty Officier

Congratulations, citizen! In recognition of your exemplary service, you have been chosen as loyalty officer for this mission. This appointment shows The Computer’s special faith in you.
Your duties include watching your fellow Troubleshooters for signs of substandard zeal, recording and reporting any incidents of disloyalty and taking immediate corrective action when the opportunity arises.
You report directly to The Computer, not to your team leader. You must be ever vigilant. Any Troubleshooter can spot blatant Commie sabotage, but it is your highly trained eye The Computer relies on to see Commie plots before they hatch.
Study The 10 Early Warning Signs of Commie Traitorism. Observe the other Troubleshooters. Note which ones have substandard zeal, which ones use irregular speech patterns, which ones act— funny. You are the eyes of The Computer, ever watchful, always observant, forever with your ear to the door.
Remember, only you can prevent Commie traitorism.

Hygeine Officier

Congratulations, citizen! Your MBD is team hygiene officer.
This is a solemn honor. Only the most trusted servants of The Computer serve as hygiene officer.
Yours are the duties of The Scrubbing Helmet, that legendary bastion of clean corridors and well-flossed Troubleshooters. Serve his memory well!
Your responsibilities include monitoring the PHL (Personal Hygiene Level) of each team member, reporting when a Troubleshooter fails his PHT (Personal Hygiene Test), and implementing ESP (Emergency Sanitation Procedures) against any and all offenders.
To aid you, The Computer has generously provided you a PHTCMK (Personal Hygiene Test and Cleanliness Maintenance Kit) for performing PHTs and ESPs on your fellow Troubleshooters. Consult your briefing officer for instructions.
Take your duty seriously. Recent team leader post-mission reports indicate 52% of all mission disasters can be blamed on hygiene neglect by the hygiene officer. Failure to report sub-standard PHLs is treason.
Remember, ACTIAMT: A Clean Team Is A Mean Team!

Comminications and Recording Officier

Congratulations, citizen! Your Mandatory Bonus Duty for this mission is communications and recording officer (C&RO). Your two-fold assignment is a high honor and a sign of The Computer’s trust in you.
As communications officer, it is your job to handle the com unit. This is important, as (in the event of personal communication device malfunction) it is your team’s only link to the benevolent wisdom of The Computer. Interpret The Computer’s instructions, and relay questions and information to The Computer. Handle this duty wisely!
As recording officer, you are in charge of the all-important multicorder. Use it to record the mission in exciting detail in 156-bit color with state-of-the-art sound fidelity. Use close-ups, exotic lighting, scenes shot in infrared and in-depth interviews with suspected traitors. Missing a scene is treason. Re-stage exciting moments you may have overlooked. Your recordings may end up on the evening vidshows for all Alpha Complex to see!
Take your duty seriously. Recent team leader reports indicate 61% of all mission disasters can be blamed on the C&RO’s failure to keep an accurate mission record.
The Computer is everywhere—but you must be everywhere else! Don’t let The Computer down!

Equipment Person

Congratulations, citizen! You have been selected as the bots, weapons, vehicles and sundry equipment repair and maintenance officer, colloquially known as the equipment guy. The Computer trusts you! Why else would you be responsible for every piece of assigned mission equipment?
As equipment guy, you have many responsibilities. You must regularly and punctually carry out RSIs (Random Surprise Inspections). Collect all weapons and equipment your fellow Troubleshooters carry, and check each item for signs of wear, misuse and sabotage. If you find evidence of sabotage or tampering, report it immediately to your loyalty officer or team leader or directly to The Computer. You will be soundly rewarded for your efforts.
It is also your duty to see that all R&D devices assigned to the team are tested, bots have their protective asimov circuits checked regularly and all vehicles perform as intended.
If your team comes across an Old Reckoning device, you are responsible for obtaining it and returning it to The Computer for analysis.
Finally, you serve as team driver/pilot, except on those occasions you feel it necessary to appoint someone else to this task.
Remember, if it’s not broken, fix it!

Happiness Officier

Congratulations, citizen! Due to your properly zealous attitude you’ve been chosen as happiness officer. This is a great honor. Only those who know the true joy of being an Alpha Complex citizen are appointed happiness officer. Your selection shows The Computer’s exceptional faith in you.
As happiness officer it’s your duty to keep team morale high and to motivate your fellow Troubleshooters with frequent pep talks, singalongs, and practical jokes.
In addition, you must constantly be on the alert for SSM (Sub-Standard Morale) among your fellow Troubleshooters. Here are some early warning signs of SSM: argumentativeness, a reluctance to volunteer, questioning the team leader, habitual frowning when you tell jokes, and a refusal to participate in group singalongs.
As happiness officer you’re authorized to give PSDs (Personality Stabilizer Drugs) to any Troubleshooter who shows signs of SSM. You’ll be given a variety of PSDs for dispensing. Failure to treat SSM is treason! Remember, laugh and the whole Complex laughs with you, cry and you fry alone.

Put me down for happiness officer.

Friend Computer! I feel that I am a far better choice to play the Loyalty Officer, Friend Computer! This is because I want only what is in the best interest of Alpha Complex, and Loyalty is in the best interest of Alpha Complex, and I am inherently far more loyal than Belenumeria. You will note, Friend Computer, that the other concerned citizen has a "U" in his name. I am not in a position to discuss whether "U" stands for a prohibited security clearance, because rumors are treason and unlike some people I am completely loyal, but I will leave it to Friend Computer to compute any inferences.

Ahem.

And if not, give me (gulp) Team Leader.

oh no. this is gonna hurt.

Crothian said:

It's perferred that you never played before. People that have played suffer from the illusion they know what the game is. Being new the only delusions you'll have are the normal ones you carry around in every day life.

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Sing-a-longs? That seals the deal! Sign me up for the happiness officer.

Woo Hoo!!!

Edit: Damn!! Too late. I guess I'll grab the hygeine officer

Alenda said:

Sing-a-longs? That seals the deal! Sign me up for the happiness officer.

Woo Hoo!!!

Edit: Damn!! Too late. I guess I'll grab the hygeine officer

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I don't care about happiness officer, I just thought I would be good at making dumb jokes. I could also go equipment officer. It isn't an issue with me if you want it!