Gamer Grrls

[Li Shenron]

If the problem is with a single player or two in the group, I wonder what do the others think about it. You should bring the topic up and discuss it openly, although that could possibly make the situation worse if the guy is really stupid :\ in which case at least you will know you shouldn't waste your time with a group that makes you uncomfortable.

I have seen it happen a couple of times anyway, a player being sexist towards gaming girls, and always expecting the women not to be able to keep up with the (in their own opinion) "good tactics".

 

[S'mon]

I find when I play D&D and other d20 roleplaying games I tend to have difficulty with some of the male gamers. They expect me to play some sexed sorceress in barely there clothes or a fighter chick in a chainmail bikini.

I haven't really noticed this in my own group...

Actually, off-hand I don't think I've ever seen this re female players, although at Gencon as a male player & GM I've been handed and created a few pregen PCs who fit the chainmail bikini archetype. I don't mind the archetype per se but I do strongly object to attempts to force players to play one particular type of character just because of the player's own sex (or race, age, height, etc).

 

[Falconnan]

1. I will not defend bad behavior, but it does have a root cause. The male psyche is not all about dominating women. A woman in a chainmail bikini is more comedic to me than arousing, but I can understand it. Fantasy games focus one's fantasies. Don't tolerate the bad behavior, but try to appreciate the humor value. In other words, try to laugh at them in a way that tells them they are fools for letting this into the game. It will at least make you feel better, and may teach them something.
2. My wife games. She does not care for the mechanics end of the game, and prefers to have me or others help her construct her characters. She has the ability, just not the desire. She does dictate the theme of her characters, however. She plays rogues particularly well, and saved a very powerful party through her unorthodox, aggressive playing style.
3. These same personal traits are part of what led me to marry her. And no, she has never, to my knowledge, worn a chainmail bikini, though now that I think about it . . .

Ohh Ho-one-ey . . . !

 

[Falconnan]

Wife's verdict:
Chainmail-no.
Leather and chainmail-yes

 

[James Heard]

I've had my share of female gamers simply playing or overplaying the stereotypes, kissing up (or trying to kiss up to) the GM like they need their hands held too. I think the problem with vaguely waving at what seems like to perhaps be a problem with the guys sometimes has it's root occassionally with the females themselves. That's not saying that I haven't played with excellent female players, just that for every wonderful player of ANY gender I've had I've had a couple of placeholders and just plain kick them to the door sorts...and you can't do that haphazardly with a lot of female gamers without risking sounding sexist or ticking off the below-the-belt-boys who are simply excited without merit that one of their fellow gamers wears a bra. I'd be a lot happier if more female gamers didn't resort to baby talk and cleavage-chick tricks at the table because it would make it a whole lot more about the game and not hormones.

 

[Falconnan]

Quoting my wife-not a member--
"If the guys want her to play that kind of character-do it.
Use Charisma as your highest score.
Use bluff, intimidate, or whatever, other skill appropriate to get their characters killed. Play the sex-pot if they try to pigeon-hole you, then make them regret it. Bad guys love bad girls. "

Me again:
No one ever tried this with her in our game. Likely why our mortality rate was low.

 

[Ottergame]

I've played with a number of female gamers. They've run the gamit from "over compensating for the sterotype", to normal people, to sexed up horny bimbos, to girlfriend of the GM who's playing because she wants to be involved yet spends the whole time coloring and talking on the cell phone.

 

[Li Shenron]

Never met a female gamer who behaved as James and Ottergame describe.

 

[Lord Pendragon]

Would it be rude to ask your age, and the age of your gaming groups, Chaos Kitten? I ask because it sounds a lot like maturity that is the problem. Granted, adults can be immature, but I've yet to come across the kind of blatant sexism you are describing off the playground.

Perhaps I'm just sheltered.

 

[Ogre Mage]

I am male, but play a female human cleric with a similar theme -- war domain, divine favor (quickened), GMW, divine power, righteous might. Early in the campaign, some of the (male) players were surprised she had a base STR of 16. She certainly does not wear a chain mail bikini (even with CHA 14). The campaign has reached 8th-9th level and for a while some of the other players acted surprised that with multiple buff spells in play, her bonus to hit is around +20. Now they spend more time hiding behind her than anything else.