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Help With my monsters

Clifford

First Post
Alright here is a monster i am working on and i need me some help with it. Is there anything wrong that you can see?

A’Bao A’Qu

Medium Sized Outsider (good, Incorporeal)
Hit Dice: 3d8 (17 hp)
Initiative: +4 (Inproved Inish)
Speed: Fly 30’ [perfect]
AC: 15 (+5 Natural)
Attacks: six Tentacles +7 Melee
Damage: 1d4 (Holy Damage) + Energy Drain on evil creatures.
Face/Reach: 5ft x 5ft/ 5ft
Special Attacks: Feeding
Special Qualities: Sr 14, Blur, Detect evil, Bless, Incorporeal, Dr 20/+2
Saves: Fort +4, Ref +4, Will +8
Abilities: Str-, Dex 11, Con 10, Int 10, Wis 18, Cha 20
Skills: Hide +6, Sense Motive +10, Move silently + 6, Concentration +6
Feats: Improved Inish
Climate/Terrain: Any
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: none
Alignment: Any good
Advancement: 4-10 (Med sized) 11-15 (large) 16-20 (Huge) 21-40 (Gargantuan )

An A’bao A’qu is a creature from the plains of good that seems to drink the essence of evil beings.
The origin of these mysterious creatures in caked in speculation. There seems to be a connection between these creature and lantern archons though the nature of this Connection has never been verified but it has been documented that when an A’bao A’Qu Dies it seems to create lantern archons. Though good its self the A’Bao A’Qu seems to have an incomprehensible mind and cannot (Or Dose Not) Communicate by any means. The A’Bao A’Qu Just seems to hunt an kill evil creatures for their Spirits. It Should be noted that an A’Bao A’Qu may ignore an evil creature who is trying to reform the A’Bao A’Qu seems to be able to detect this. An A’Bao A’Qu can be found anywhere that evil can be found.

An A’Bao A’Qu resemble translucent Energy beings with many writhing tentacles, Most of their features are blurry and Unidentifiable with any amount of detail. A’bao A’Qu Are most often a light blue in color
Though this is by no means a rule.

Combat

A’Bao A’Qu Rush into combat against evil creatures Slapping with their tentacles and Flailing about
Seeking Evil creatures to devour.

Feeding (Su): With its tentacle attack the A’Bao A’Qu Can inflict 1 Negative level on an evil creature.
Fort save (DC 18) To Resist loosing a level. Each Eight Levels drained in the fashion Boost the A’Bao A’Qu up One hit dice with all Normal Benefits. If for example a 10 HD A’Bao A’Qu drains enough levels to become 11 HD dice its size would also increase with all applicable bonuses as for a large creature.

Blur (Sp): A’Bao A’Qu Are constantly under the effects of a blur spell. Dispel Magic works as normal but the Creature may reactivate it as a free action.

Holy Aura (Su): the A’Bao A’Qu Has an effect identical to Holy Aura on its self at all times. This counts as if cast by a cleric of a level equal to the A’Bao A’Qu’s Hit dice.

Bless (Sp): All good aligned creatures with in 100’ gain the benefits of a bless Spell but only is the A’Bao A’Qu has “eaten” within the last hour.

Incorporeal (Su): Only harmed by +1 or better magic weapons, or magic, with a 50% chance to ignore any damage from a corporeal source. Can pass through solid objects at will, and own attacks pass through armor. Always moves silently.

Death Throws (Ex): When an A’Bao A’Qu Dies or drains enough life energy to become 41 hit dice it explodes into A Mini Nova of Holy Energy. Evil Creatures within this area take 1d6 points of holy damage per hit dice of the A’Bao A’Qu, A reflex save may be made for ½ damage [Dc 10 +1/2 the A’Bao A’Qu’s Hit dice + its Con Modifier] Much of this energy is Infused with the innate Good energy of the A’bao A’qu and Congeals into lantern archons. 1 in 20 of these lantern archons will grow to become a New A’bao A’qu in about 100 years. An A’bao A’Qu creates 1 lantern archon per hit dice it Possessed when it explodes.


Cliff:D
 

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Psychotic Jim

First Post
A unique, actually alien-minded extraplanar monster. Looks like there are a few errors. Average hp for a 3 HD outsider should be 13 (3 * 4.5). saves should be +3/+3/+7 (you have a +3 base save bonus for all saves as a 3 HD ousider). How did you get a +7 attack bonus for the tentacles (BAB is +3). Also, what is the caster level on the bless and blur abilities. Lastly, the bonus incoporeal creatures get to AC for the Cha modifier is a deflection bonus, not a natural armor bonus. Creatures with the incoporeal subtype cannot have natural armor modifiers to AC.
 

Clifford

First Post
Thanx

Thanks for the imput jim. The Origonal version of the monster wasnot incorporeal and the ab+7 is probably from the strength score it once posessed.

CLiff:D
 

Clifford

First Post
ANother monster for everyones consideration. The abtu

Abtu (Anet)

Medium Sized Magical Beast (Aquatic)
Hit Dice: 4d10 +4 (26 hp)
Initiative: +2 (+2 dex)
Speed: Swim 40’
AC: 16 (+4 natural, +2 dex)
Attacks: 1 Bite +6 melee
Damage: 1d6 + 2
Face/Reach: 5ft x 5ft/5ct
Special Attacks: None
Special Qualities: Tireless
Saves: Fort +4, Ref +4, Will +1
Abilities: Str 14 , Dex 14, Con 12 , Int 10 , Wis 14 , Cha 12
Skills: Intuit Direction +29, Hide +9, Tumbling (water tricks) +9, Bluff +8
Feats: Alertness, Endurance
Climate/Terrain: Any warm fresh Watters
Organization: Solitary Or pair (One abtu and one anet)
Challenge Rating: 2
Treasure: Double Coins only
Alignment: Either Lawful Neutral Or Chaotic Neutral
Advancement: 5-8 (Medium)

Abtu are Large Fish, which resemble plump sturgeons with a patch of red scales on their heads. Anet are female Abtu, which look similar to their male counterparts but lack the red patch..

Abtu are benevolent river guides, which will safely Guide boats to their destinations. Anet are tricksters, which lead boats Astray for fun. Each only charge a Gold coin For a safe voyage However the Anet Will Always try and Lead the boat astray possibly at the behalf of one of the passengers enemies. However an anet would find it just as funny to deceive the Enemy just as well.

Each spring each abtu and anet switches their alignment to Neutral and begins Courtship rituals and several weeks later they spawn a brood of baby abtu and antes about a dozen in number. After which the Female and male leave to allow the baby to fend for themselves. Both abtu and anet Speak their own Aquan and common.

Combat
Abtu prefer not to fight and will flee if provoked. If forced however they will fight with their powerful bite.

Tireless (Ex): Abtu never get tiered and never sleep.

Skills: Abtu Get a +20 to intuit direction checks.
 

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