D&D 5E Poll: Is it rude for a sidelined player to leave the session?

[BookBarbarian]

For me, it depends. I play a lot of Adventure League. If my character got killed in the first combat and the group didn't have a reasonable way to get them revived...there is very little incentive to stay. It's a module, not part of an ongoing story line that involves my character. Most of the people at the table are acquaintances, not close friends. And I probably already know how the module ends anyway, because you tend to replay a lot of the same modules with different characters.

If it was a home game with a group of friends, I'd be much more likely to stay. It's also much more likely that the DM would find a way for me to remain involved in the game on some level. But even then, it's possible that I would decide to head home or something if I felt that sitting around and kvetching would be more disruptive than helpful.

Good point about adventurer's league. I only play with friends, so the thought didn't even occur to me.

 

[Inchoroi]

I would say if the DM is bad enough to let a player sit inactive for a long period of time, then no, not at all. If, however, they have to sit for 5-10 minutes before, say, the focus turns back to the other half of the party in our hypothetical split, then yes, absolutely. In other words, it depends on the specifics. I wouldn't hesitate to kick a player that just ditched to go watch a movie or something silly. I'm not known for my patience, however, in those sorts of situations.

 

[Fanaelialae]

My answer: no, it's not rude unless he does it rudely. E.g. if he leaves in a huff, or leaves when it's likely his absence will cause problems for other players later on (e.g. early session termination when the party gets back together), then it is rude. But it is not intrinsically rude to make good use of your time.

I agree (and also voted no) although I would point out that it would be just as rude, at least IMO, to remain at the table while in a huff.

 

[FormerlyHemlock]

Um .... you and I have very different definitions of "requested{.}"

My specific statement, in regards to this poll that you mentioned, was-

"Given the extremely strong nature of the commentary from some respondents, you are welcome to set up that poll.

I'll bring popcorn."

I've got popcorn!


(If you didn't parse my response, it meant that there was no way in heck I was setting up this poll, because of the very ... passionate ... opinions that have been elicited on this topic in multiple threads)

Oh. I misinterpreted your response then.

 

[lowkey13]

*Deleted by user*

 

[cbwjm]

Man ... this is making me miss the Warlock threads.

Warlock threads? All I can think of is a thread titled "Is it rude for a warlock to break his pact early".

 

[cbwjm]

My answer is no, if the players character is completely out of the game with no chance of coming back then, yeah, feel free to head off.

I guess it does depend on the situation and hopefully the players, and that includes the DM, are able to read it well enough to figure out if the PC is going to be able to come back into the game during the session. Some sidelined players may want to stick around anyway depends a bit on the group dynamic.

 

[hawkeyefan]

I voted yes and also it depends.

If the only reason they're leaving is because their PC is down or banished or whatever, that seems pretty rude to me. Plus, are there that many ways a PC could be sidelined that couldn't be fixed?

On the other hand, if the player has some other obligations they could be meeting, and they opt out because of that, then I can understand.

It really does boil down to how they went about it, as with most social activities.

 

[Lanefan]

Now I'm imagining six players ghosting into your living room, leaving beer, whiskey, and rum... then all leaving. And there you are, all alone, with a pile of alcohol.

And where, exactly, do I sign up to DM this game; cause I'll be there in a heartbeat!

 

[Lanefan]

Situationally dependent, for me.

If I'm out for the duration and know it, my staying/leaving will depend on a bunch of things including how engaging the ongoing play is, how tired I am and-or what I have to do next morning, whether there's anyone else also out long-term who I can shoot the breeze with, and so on.

One other aspect that hasn't been brought up at all yet is whether the sidelined player is supposed to even know what's happening in his/her character's absence. We're pretty strict on player knowledge = character knowledge, and if for example the party is split and I-as-DM know I won't get to one part of it this session then I might even suggest that/those player/s leave early as an alternative to having to sit in another room (or my having to take the active group to another room) while I take care of the active group.

Lanefan