The Ethics of Two Way Ignore

[Willie the Duck]

I tend to limit my ignoring to 'non-contributors' (trolls, people looking to start fights, etc.), but that is almost exclusively because not being able to see parts of a conversation is disjointing enough that the benefits do not outweigh the burdens.

I don't think there's any reason to second guess the decision of anyone else to ignore others, nor why. Nor to fear that one is getting a one-sided view of things. This is all in regards to the topics discussed on this board, which are by decree excluding of 'Things that matter(tm)*." This is a forum for discussion of opt-in hobby activities (and, for that matter, we have no reason to believe that this forum is a representative sample of the hobby as a whole). Curating what portions of the discussion happening here is of no major consequence to the world at large, nor one's understanding of it. If I'm on the Bloom County fan forum and don't want to discuss the mating habits of the giant purple snorklewhacker with that guy who adamantly thinks the strip's best days were in the Major/Bobbi Harlow/Mr. Limekiller era and brings. it. into. every. discussion., it is of no consequence to anything. Same with here. Pick the engagement here that brings you joy, full stop. *Yes, if you are actively choosing to engage in the discussions of the ways of the world (how it works or how it should), then selectively surrounding yourself with people with whom you already agree is deleterious to your understanding of how the world at large see things (and potentially changing anyone's mind on anything). In that instance, selectively curating your surrounding discussions might be less advisable (although even then, arguing politics on the internet often isn't as fruitful as one would hope).

Regarding the OP topic -- I share OP poster's concern. I don't think "I want to ignore your posts" should equate to "you do not get to participate in a discussion simply because I started the topic," so I am glad that the forum software no longer does this. Figuring out the downstream consequences of a software implementation is always the fun/frustrating part of development, and glad someone is paying attention/looking for ways to improve the experience.

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[MNblockhead]

Don't you think that most disputes which rise to the level of ignore on this site, are less about RPGs and more about non-RPG content? Hence the no political commentary rule. I mean sure we got edition wars but I dunno, I feel the non-rpg stuff is far more polarising amongst posters.

Probably, but the only people I've ignored were over constant spamming of the same trolling, snarky, anti-WotC posts on thread, after thread, after thread, which spawned the same arguments over and over and over again. For a while, especially and for a while after the OGL fiasco, it was making this site unreadable for me.

What kinda surprised me is that only by ignoring three people, everything became readable again. Some people seem to have an endless store of gripe and an inability to let up or let other people talk about anything even marginally related without interjecting the same complaints and sealioning you when you choose not to (re‑re‑re‑re...)engage with them about their pet peeve.

 

[MNblockhead]

<snip>

I don't think it is usually a question of looking for an echo chamber, but I do think it is an easy thing to fall into if you are too ready to block people you just disagree with. It doesn't apply so much with hobbies, but politics wise you see it a lot. Especially those folks that use "block lists" and block folks just because they follow a particular person they really don't like. I follow a lot of people I really don't like the views of because you need to know what the opposition is up to and also you need to challenge your own beliefs every now and again.

</snip>

I think seeking out an echo chamber is fine. I come here to read and talk about a hobby I like with others who are interested in it. But in my experience, I'm blocking out someone who keeps shouting out the same thing again, again, and again, trying to force me into their echo chamber. The ignore feature can be helpful to cut down on the noise and spend more time engaging with more people rather than being forced to continually engage with someone who keeps following you into every room trying to corner you into listening to the same rant.

 

[Li Shenron]

Why are you playing in a PBP with someone who you don't want to talk to?

It was mostly a joke... but then, it does happen quite often than in a PBP there are more applicant players than 'slots' and the DM ends up choosing who's going to play, so it is not impossible to be accepted in a game together with someone whose 'application' you couldn't even see.

On second thoughts, there are people I put on my ignored list because they are rude and aggressive when discussing about rules or "how the game should be played", but can be totally fine once they are actually playing it. In fact, I usually think it's also common for some people to become aggressive because they are not playing enough. But we only get one ignore list that works for all subforums, so we can accept that.

 

[Jahydin]

Appreciate the insight on why other use the this feature.

I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but boy does it make me feel awful when I notice someone's blocked me. All I can think about it is how badly they must hate me and how I just want to say sorry.

 

[Scribe]

Appreciate the insight on why other use the this feature.

I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but boy does it make me feel awful when I notice someone's blocked me. All I can think about it is how badly they must hate me and how I just want to say sorry.

I wouldnt say I hate the people I have on ignore, its more I just dont need the negativity they bring in my life.

 

[Whizbang Dustyboots]

I wouldnt say I hate the people I have on ignore, its more I just dont need the negativity they bring in my life.

Yeah, at least two of the people I have on ignore I think are genuinely nice people. But I don't need the temptation to reply to their nonsense every time they post (and they are both prolific), especially as it would turn me into the kind of angry person I don't want to be.

 

[Scribe]

Yeah, at least two of the people I have on ignore I think are genuinely nice people. But I don't need the temptation to reply to their nonsense every time they post (and they are both prolific), especially as it would turn me into the kind of angry person I don't want to be.

Yeah the funniest/saddest thing is that I've got common ground probably with a few, but their militant views on other things are just not something I need to see on a forum about an elf game.

 

[Jahydin]

I wouldnt say I hate the people I have on ignore, its more I just dont need the negativity they bring in my life.

Everyone on here seems genuinely nice, so I 100% know no one actually hates me. Just a stupid persistent thought I have to fight off every now and then, haha.

 

[Snarf Zagyg]

Everyone on here seems genuinely nice to me, so I 100% know no one actually hates me. Just a stupid persistent thought I have to fight off every now and then, haha.

If it makes you feel better, I hate everyone. Even me. Especially me.

Anyway, I don't think that's there's any ethical issue with blocking people. Sometimes you need to take a break from certain people for your own mental health; sometimes you need a permanent vacation. It's all good.

I have found that some people take blocking personally, which I don't fully understand. Other than a select group of people, I will often use block as a timeout when things get heated. Sometimes it's them, sometimes it's me. Who knows? It takes two to tango.

After a while, I'll unblock and check their latest posts to see if my blood is less angry. Usually it is, and I keep it off. A few times, I've noticed that the person in question has "retaliated" by blocking me, which means I don't know, so I leave them on block. Oh well, c'est la vie.