A Respect Scenario To Consider

[ArghMark]

I suppose what we don't know is the cultural background/race/class of the fellow who got the knife pulled on him, nor his general demeanor.

From a very generalized look at classes alone.. the response would be..

Fighting class - Pulling a knife in a hostile manner? Initiative, baby! It may not be to the death, but pulling a knife on a highly trained warrior is known as a stupid thing to do regardless of the situation.

(Later) - Scuffle? What scuffle? It's been sorted out.

Skill class - I do apologize.. perhaps you could tell me about your culture...?

(Later) We're all friends here, Chase!

Magic class - I fully apologize and will not do so in future.

(Later) You want healing? You pulled a knife on me, you mad, ignorant dog.



Not knowing the issue, I do know that if player a was trying to add roleplay into the position, he did so in a violent way that denied the response that anyone could give. He suddenly (and without knowing the details) spontaneously acted like a violent thug.

If he had for instance, glared, put his hand on his dagger, and growled a menacing threat, it would of been a salvagable scene. As it was, the only thing the guy being held up could do is say 'Eep!' or break the scene.

As such, a consistent party would address the issue in a firm manner. Do the other pcs just laugh it off and keep going, or do they suddenly realise having a crazy foreigner who is as likely to stab them as the enemy is worthwhile?


As a direct response, for game reasons, I expect the PC should back down, because its the only option that wouldn't end in violence, but to re-address the issue at a later point.

 

[Michael Silverbane]

I would tell that character's player to stop acting like a jackwagon.

 

[FireLance]

So, do you show him respect and back down and not call him by his last name or do you threaten him in someway and not show him any respect at all and risk never earning his friendship?

Can I show him respect AND threaten him in some way?

First: "Okay, Julian. I didn't know you felt so strongly about it. All you had to do was ask."

Followed by: "Incidentally, that shoving me against a wall and putting a dagger to my throat thing? Not cool. In my culture, it's considered extremely rude if not downright hostile. Do it again, and you'll shortly be getting acquainted with the business end of my weapon."

 

[Heathen72]

It might be worth saying to the player that having his character hold a knife against your character's neck is extremely offensive gaming etiquette, and indicate to him that if he does so again that you won't continue to game with him.

I really object to intra party conflict of this sort, particularly where (as indicated above) it is unexpected - it can actually be very upsetting to go through. I would suggest it is more about the 'Chase' player trying to control the other players in the group than anything to do with his character's 'culture'.

It might be that he feels your character wasn't giving his character the respect he felt he was due - I have seen this happen before where a players felt his character concept was undermined by a wise cracking player - but this is not the right way to go about it.

Role playing in a party means that people often have to compromise their character concept a little for things to function. Chase's player might argue that he is simply playing his character, but by doing so he is relying on you to compromise yours (if you feel that you would normally reciprocate) to keep the party together. Unless the game is one in which the PC's are encourage to kill each other, it is extremely rude. And if you are trying to create a party in which the the characters need to work together, it is untenable.

I would have a discussion with the player and the GM and see if there is perhaps another reason why he felt the need to assault your player. If not indicate squarely to him that it is not on.

Or ask the GM to have some NPC's call him Chase. See how quick he is to pull out a knife when the Chief of Police calls him that.

 

[coyote6]

In general, defuse, and then he and my character become members of different parties (i.e., depending on whom the rest of the party supports, one or the other of us is playing a new PC).

Specifics depend on the particular character involved. The last PC I played would laugh and point out that Julian was holding a nice steel knife against an enchanted mithral gorget -- not going to slice anything important that way -- then ask him to to put it away or use it (OOC, "aka roll initiative"). The PC before that was an evil necropolitan warlock, so he'd probably apologize, and then coup de grace Chase at the first opportunity (don't go to sleep, Julian).

Other PCs might point out that there was a gun in Chase's belly, and several others pointed at his head, and in my culture bringing a knife to a gunfight is usually pretty dumb.

One thing I'm pretty sure -- there would be not much respect paid. He would at best be called Julian, with special emphasis and as much sneer as possible, forever after.

 

[TheYeti1775]

Depends on the group really.

Star Wars game I'm playing now.
I constantly and purposely mispronounce one of the Jedi names because I know it irks the character (not the player).
It makes for good role-play. It's when players take it personal that it becomes an issue.

 

[delericho]

He doesn't like it. He gets really upset with you. Then one day he shoves you against a wall and puts a dagger to your throat and says:

So, do you show him respect and back down and not call him by his last name or do you threaten him in someway and not show him any respect at all and risk never earning his friendship?

IRL? It would never actually arise - I respect people enough to call them by the names they wish to be called by. So, the issue would never arise.

However, if anything of the sort did arise, my first instinct would be to extricate myself from the situation (which probably means backing down). I would then leave, and never again associate with the person (in the gaming group, it would be an "it's them or me" ultimatum). And I would also call the police to report the assault and threats, for good measure.

In-game?

It depends on my character. Most likely, I'd explain to the DM that, no, his character did not just put a knife to my character's throat, at the very least without some sort of initiative and/or attack roll. (And if the DM then lets it stand without a roll, then I would actually walk from the game over that.)

Also, if the character I'm playing is enough of a jerk to be calling someone by a name they hate, and is hanging around a person unbalanced enough to pull a knife over it, then my character is probably sufficiently morally ambiguous that he'd respond by knifing Chase while he sleeps, or slipping poison in his ale, or otherwise exacting a painful and fatal revenge.

 

[jbear]

Umm ... I put 'Don't back Down' ... but like others have mentioned, that would depend on the character I am playing.

I don't mind or take offense at situations like this as long as I'm sure the dislike between characters is in-game and hasn't spilled over into a dislike between players.

I chose 'Don't Back Down' because my current character is a care free, hard to the core fighter who has no fear of death. He enjoys giving people he meets 'nicknames' and if he were to discover that a companion was irked by the use of his last name he'd enjoy some friendly ribbing. If the DM deemed he had actually managed to get a knife up to my character's throat without being able to react, I guess he'd back down at that time. He has some street wisdom. But it is not something he would let go by just like that. I think the first thing he'd do would be to start insisting that the offending ally call him exclusively by his last name because in his culture only close friends call each other on a first name basis and given that he made it perfectly clear that they are not friends then formality is called for. Of course he'd do this with a grin splitting his face from side to side. Then he'd probably add that if he doesn't respect my culture and makes me draw my hammer on him it won't be to talk about cultural differences.

It would be helpful though to put the question into a slightly wider context in order to give any kind of decent response.

 

[Diamond Cross]

It would be helpful though to put the question into a slightly wider context in order to give any kind of decent response.

I don't have any because it was something that I came up with at the top of my head.

 

[the Jester]

It depends on the group, but generally, if you threaten another pc over something like this and you never bothered to bring it up in a nicer way first, I'd probably shrug and go along with it- but I wouldn't work very hard to keep him alive after the fact.

It depends on the pc though- I've had characters that would immediately throw down when threatened, and would fight to the death unless an apology was forthcoming. And then would apologize himself for giving offense. And issue a firm warning that next time I'd cut his own arm off with that self-same dagger.