Why does the stigma of the "jerk GM" still persist in our hobby?

[Morrus]

Buy-in level.
...

You literally need just a pen and paper to get started in this hobby. You don't even need to buy a gamebook -- you can borrow a friend's or even spontaneously come up with a primitive form of RPG yourself. You don't even need to GM.

Even computer games require you have a PC, a games console or a handheld device AND THEN have a copy of the game itself to play. It is very unlikely -- outside of your teenage/undergrad years -- you will know someone you can just borrow expensive kit like that. You cannot spontaneously come up with your own computer game -- that requires a talent called "programming" and that's just cut off 70% of humanity already from the jump.

Archery: you need to pay to be a member of an archery association, plus regular dues to a club you've joined so you can shoot at their range and use their equipment (+ your own personal gear expenses)

Sailing: you need to at least pay a time-share on a vessel, you need to have training and a license to sail, you need to have a full day free to really get anything out of it

Foodie: you need to have the disposable income to afford to eat-out regularly (w/ everything that includes) at nice places and to be able to take the all-too common financial risk that a restaurant or hole-in-the-wall might suck.

And on and on and on.
...

The vast majority of hobbies require decent disposable income and/or some level of skill to do them at a level where you're getting anything out of them.

This means we've already filtered for a certain caliber of people. If you have even half-decent disposable income AND you're paying rent and bills, you're probably going to be at least semi-competent socially. And if you're a snooker cue, it's likely going to be in an endearing or charming way.

In my experience, in the many online and offline games I've run, at least half the table is filled with people who are shift workers, on contract or are students. The other half is usually like myself (NB: I'm in my twenties): white-collared, salaried young professionals or those who run their own companies (either straight successful or getting there).

When the former group come to play, a lot of them are there for power fantasies and vicarious gaming. If they're players, they come to get themselves validated; GMs, they're there to get control over something in their lives. The latter group -- we don't need that because we're already leveling up in real-life. And that's a 100% real.

So that's where, most of the time, you get jerk RPGers in general, not just GMs (because in my experience, players are usually the problem, not GMs).

That's not what I asked; you're begging the question.

You've explained why you think there are more jerks in our hobby than others. My question was: are there more jerks in our hobby than others? I'm not sold on the premise that there are. Without establishing that the premise is true, explanations for the premise are rather pointless.

 

[Hussar]

The number of people playing and DMing has expanded quite a bit since it came out. I suppose a few very, very rural areas with no cities withing an hour drive might be in this situation. The number of bad DMs, though, is still a very small minority of DMs, so there is no tendency for DMs to just lose it and go power mad.



Reality does not bear out that theory. Even back in the '80's when I was playing 1e, the edition that gave the DMs the most power, while having the fewest DMs out there, and the smallest number of alternatives, I only encountered power mad DM. During 2e I encountered a couple more at conventions and walked away from those games. Didn't hit any of them during 3e at all. If your theory was correct, virtually every DM that I encountered would have be a rabid, power mad DM.

Not at all. I'm just saying that a combination of younger, and thus less mature, DM's plus being placed in a position of considerable authority, leads to a number of potential issues. Not that "virtually every DM" would be rabid and power mad.

I'd agree that it's a small minorty. Thing is, it doesn't take a lot of numbers to run into it fairly often. If even 10% of DM's are jerks, it's not that hard to run into.

 

[Maxperson]

Losing players is hardly a check on GM privilege; it's just the last and final resort of the desperate because no actual checks on GM privilege exist or all other methods have been exhausted.

Maybe if you are a glutton for punishment. During the threeish DMs that I encountered who were like this, I walked out after one session and I didn't even finish out the night in one of them. There is not other resort that I'm going to try UNLESS I know that the DM is very new and these are just growing pains caused by a lack of understanding. Then I will help the DM.

 

[Maxperson]

Not at all. I'm just saying that a combination of younger, and thus less mature, DM's plus being placed in a position of considerable authority, leads to a number of potential issues. Not that "virtually every DM" would be rabid and power mad.

I'd agree that it's a small minorty. Thing is, it doesn't take a lot of numbers to run into it fairly often. If even 10% of DM's are jerks, it's not that hard to run into.

So first, I think 10% is about 3 times higher than it actually is. That is of course my opinion based on my experiences, but I've encountered many DMs in a city the size of Los Angeles since 1983 when I started playing.

Second, I agree with you that the younger you are, the more prone to abusing the DM power you are, but at the same time the younger you are, the more likely are not to care. I didn't like it when my Jr. High friends put their butts near my head and farted, but I laughed at it and called them something I can't post here. Now I'd tell them not to do that again(not they would try).

I'm not even counting my Jr. High and High School DMs for just that reason. It's just a different environment. The three DMs I'm talking about all happened after graduation.

 

[Hussar]

Meh, not going to quibble over numbers.

 

[Maxperson]

Meh, not going to quibble over numbers.

Same here, which was the point of saying that it was based on my personal experiences instead of something super concrete.

I note that you didn't respond to the bulk of the post, which had nothing to do with numbers other than age categories.

 

[Umbran]

I'd agree that it's a small minorty. Thing is, it doesn't take a lot of numbers to run into it fairly often. If even 10% of DM's are jerks, it's not that hard to run into.

And, in terms of how human perceptions and memory works, negative experiences tend to leave an outsized impression. One bad GM is only counterbalanced by a stack of good GMs.

 

[ParanoydStyle]

Overall, I am probably one of the most miserable, vicious bastards you'll ever meet. EXCEPT when I'm GMing or DMing. Part of it is professionalism. Lots of the GMing I've done was of my own games at convention demos and the pressure was on to do a fantastic job (while being extremely patient and charming) in order to make the game I'm trying to sell look as awesome as it is. Part of it is pride. DMing is definitely the thing I'm best at, and it's also something I'm the best at of anyone I've ever met. So even though most days I hate everyone and act accordingly, not so while DMing. My thoughts are on having perfect form.

Anyway, I'm just chiming in that I'm a misanthropic jerk of the highest order, and a very good GM (or so every player has told me), and the two are separate, and may or may not be at all related.

Part of the answer to the OP's question is that GMing is freaking hard, and sometimes the hardest part is keeping your cool in the face of idiocy, ill manners, or both without losing your COOL. Players openly fighting over the spotlight and attempting to have their characters do terribly suicidal or flat out impossible things is all stuff a GM just needs to be able to take with a smile, and that last part, taking it with a smile, is part of being a GM that is particularly hard. I mean, fact: you are working harder than the rest of the group, and on top of that you most likely are the one that actually bought the game materials and accessories, and on top of that it's very likely you're hosting, as well. It's not hard to see how a GM could become resentful of their "freeloading" players. Part of the answer to the OP's question is that I do think the role of GM attracts a few different types, one of those being the control freak who needs everything exactly their way. On top of all the mental health issues I've actually been DIAGNOSED with, I think I have a bit of an OCD/Control Freak thing going on too, but personally I try to harness my meticulous control of the game circumstances to maximize the players' enjoyment. I get very particular about lines on the Battle Mat, but I've never tried to tell a player what their character does.

 

[Hussar]

Same here, which was the point of saying that it was based on my personal experiences instead of something super concrete.

I note that you didn't respond to the bulk of the post, which had nothing to do with numbers other than age categories.

Sorry, I missed it. Was there something to reply to?

 

[Doug McCrae]

There can be a form of market incentive - bad GMs will lose players to good GMs. There are two constraints on this though. Firstly, most rpgers don't want to GM so GMs are rare. Secondly a good GM can only take so many players before their game starts to suffer. Another anti-market factor is that gamers don't primarily play rpgs because the GM is good but because they want to socialise with that particular group of people.