I like what I'm seeing so far. If you don't mind, I might yoink this for a dwarven bard NPC I may be running.
I'm thinking the rhythm for the first, second and third line in each verse might go like this:
Ba-DUM-da dah, ba-DUM-da dah, ba-da daah-da-dah da-da-daah-dah.
Or something like that...