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1. Rove McManus 2. George Lucas 3. Russell Crowe 4. Richard Branson 5. Bono Then I'd eat them.

Was it just me, or did the Eurovision Song Contest suck this year? Yes, yes, I know, it sucks every year, which is why we watch it. I don't watch Eurovision because it sucks and its supposed to suck. That's not it at all. Eurovision isn't supposed to suck - that's what makes it so entertaining...

I'm actuallly playing a character at the moment in Iron Kingdoms who is a gunslinger. He wears a broad-brimmed hat and a long coat, smokes cigars constantly, and when I speak as him I use a growlly, very familiar voice. His name is Lauden. Lauden of the East Wood. My impression has met with...

I've been playing RPGs for twelve years, and I've never had a problem with reality. Just the other day I mentioned this to the Magic Pink Pixie, the one that lives in my fridge, and he agreed that I was totally well-adjusted.

Oh, ye Gods, tell me about it! There's nothing worse than being the only one sitting there with pencil and paper while everybody else is looking at you over a laptop. It feels like you're being interrogated by the Microsoft Inquisition.

Well, in my view you're missing a lot of the fun if you minimise out-of-character discussion. I'm our group's DM 75% of the time, and I'm the worst when it comes to out-of-game discussion. The point is socialisation; if you wanted just plain role-playing you'd play WoW or something. In any case...

And, of course, there's the infamous Basher the half-orc. We eventually decided ('we' means everybody apart from the player) that 'Basher' was a nickname and encouraged the player to think of and reveal the PC's real name. Of course, he never did. He didn't think like that. He just wanted a...

We have a player/DM who sucks big-time at names. It takes him several sessions to come up with a name, and this includes for adventures he's running. We have a running gag now that everything in his world is alphabetically tagged to save time, so "Character A" goes to "Town C" to meet with...

Oh, and I once played a character called Bill the Giant. In my defence, he wasn't actually a giant, he was a half-dragon. My fellow PC asked "what the hell are you?" and I did the whole "I'm a giant" schtick, viz: *Me: I'm a giant. *Other PC: You're too short to be a giant. *Me: I've been ill...

We had a friend whose Shadowrun character, an Irish elf gunslinger was called "Rick O'Shea." We thought it was corny at first but it grew on us over time and we started to like it - it suited. The character was psycho, however. Rather like the player. We also had a Shadowrun character called...

I love the way you phrased that. Spot on.

I do know the answer. It's worse. The C-word is much worse. But why is it worse? It's demeaning to women. Absolutely, I agree. But why is it demeaning to women? Why is calling a man a "dick" not as offensive to men as "c***" is to women? I'm not suggesting things should be otherwise - I'm...

As a representative of a nation where swearing is a national passtime, I find this discussion intriguing. I swear like a drunken sailor who's just dropped the anchor on his foot. I have an incredibly foul mouth, in general. Of course I do - I'm an Australian. My conversations are littered with...

In addition to "blowing up the samurai", another thing we do when the DM attempts to railroad us is to shout "all aboard!". If it continues, we all make a noise like a train's whistle and pull on an imaginary cord to make the whistle sound. If the DM is persisting with his railroading, which...

Oh, I cannot tell you the number of times I have prayed for the existance of a plot golem... I thought of some more we use, for when we fail skill checks. [list] "Glub" means "I failed my swim check." "What floor?" means "I failed my spot check" "What planet?" means "I really badly failed my...

Here's a review: "Save your money." This review brought to you by STARP_SOCIAL_OFFICER.

We have these two, both of which stem from the same player's stupidity. Once, said player was driving home with two other players, and in the course of his conversation, he said that he had "hit a quadruped". He meant to say "quandary", except that he didn't know what the term meant and was...

I've very lax with the rules if my players want to do something cool. Basically, in my view, "cool" transcends the rules.

It's a simple formula as far as I'm concerned: moral ambiguity + good role-playing = memorable adventure.

Wait...what gate?