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"Aaaaaah! I is dead, and now is guy kiss me?! Is hell! Is hell! Nooooo!"

Whoops! I was mistaken. Looks like Tonk is indeed dying. (Isn't he just plain dead because he has no healing surges left?) Death Save 1: 1d20=5 Death Save 2: 1d20=18

Excuse me, Mr. DM! Didn't you say you were going to give us a couple of rounds without lightning, and then, the lightning would use a +4 attack bonus? If so, the lightning MISSED MY BOY! YEAH, BABY! Uh, and is it just me, or do the bare buttocks spattered with blood seem extraordinarily gross?

Mr. Pinch smiles. "Well, then, I'm sure you'll receive excellent representation. They really are the best Daunton has to offer, excepting that wheelchair-bound elderly half-elven gentleman, Matchlock Ironsides."

That can't be true. I'M the center of the universe. Nope! Everybody or nobody! "Very good." "I won't be able to provide you with legal counsel, as he is a high-ranking devil and would probably eat you, but we do have a firm that we employ from time-to-time in Daunton: Blorstrob, Eisenfeld and...

*gmmmpft* Hacker vomits in the back of his throat. "Uh...Woe, ole buddy," he says weakly, "You mind if I bother that flask again and maybe keep it for a while?"

A small smile appears on the lips of Mr. Pinch, as well as a sinister twinkle in his eyes. "Yes. And you might also want to consider that accepting a battle to the death changes the betting odds from 2 to 1 against the party to 5 to 1 against..." P.S. -- You can only bet money that you have!

Important! This is as good a time as any to mention the benefits the party has thus far for the battle... Approvalometer Effects The Approvalometer, at Green 2, all party members get a +1 bonus to attack rolls during the fight. Also, you have gained two Tokens of Favor. A party member can...

There was going to be a trash talk skill challenge before the fight. If successful, we get 100gp. Since the meter is already on green, do we assume that the preliminaries are done? Yep. If you want, you could ask for the 100 gp. The approval meter is already on the second green, so the party...

"The standard rate, of course: 500 gold pieces. This is assuming that you choose the 'to the death' option. Otherwise, revivification is automatic, and 'slain' party members will be able to view the battle from a special box and make commentary on the proceedings." If you choose 'To the Death'...

About the Sheet of Paper... The sheet of paper is a legal summons. Mr. Archibald Pennyfoolish has employed the services of Blorstrob, Eisenfeld and Grimm to sue the party for destruction of property, loss of wages, criminal trespass, and illegal improvements on a building.

About the Arena... Two approvalometers levitate above the stadium. The approvalometer for the party is on the second tier of green. The approvalometer for the Legion of Bone is middle yellow. The arena is square and surrounded by a high wall. Yes! Those are catapults. The wooden squares...

"It's a place of relaxation, where you may receive massages, soak in a hot tub, sit in a sauna, read books, listen to music, perform a wide variety of grooming, and so forth." Mr. Pinch chuckles. He has very long, sharp tusks! "Ah, delightful. I suppose you could buff in the inside of your...

Hacker takes a swig and passes the flask back. "Thanks. I wish I had a scrub brush for my brain..."

Tonk snarls with frustration, darting out from behind the trees and hurling a shuriken at the elemental. (Standard Action: Deft Strike1d20+7+2(CA)=20 1d6+4+2d6=12 -- HIT!) Tonk sneaks back under cover. (Move Action: back to 010, Stealth Check: 1d20+9=18) Damned thing is now bloodied!

Hacker shudders at Kathalia's response to the vampire. He holds his hand out to Woe. "Not so fast, pardner. I'm gonna need a shot of that, too."

"I do believe that is a question, Finnian.", says the oni. "As I stated earlier, we prefer our gladiators to be sequestered before the main event. Thus, we expect you to remain in TURTLEDOME! for the rest of the day. However, you will have full use of our day spa and lobster buffet. If I do you...

Okay, send him to 010.

"Directive? Supposition: directive implicit in function. Function of this me that is not me is violence and defense. Therefore, I defend through violence."