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That's what mementos, long distance calls, and visits are for...

Now THAT's thinking with your noggin...

And there was much rejoicing...

Now now, you are getting a scalp massage out of this glomp, no need to get violent in people's junks. As for Aeson, nope. But then, he got called on spending some excessive time on the Net at work, and seemed to be looking for some rec/exercise activities that were less computer related.

Let's just say that competitive swimmers have a lot of muscle mass in the legs. A lot. And the rest is pretty well muscled too.

I'll give it even chances, mostly because I'm sure you have more muscle strength than even the swimmers I've known. Unless, of course, I'm in an area where not being upright is perfectly safe. Then I'll just go down.

Precisely.

I still feel good about my chances to handle impact.

Maybe you should make a Goldmoon Prestige Class, then you can have exclusive use of the GoldmoonApult ability.

She was 5'11" and athletically built...

I've been jumped on by women before, I only failed to catch and hold once. I was still able to avoid injury to any involved parties. Done? I've been known to continue giving scalp massages for hours. You've got a while...

Hmmm, 6'+ redhead grabbing my midsection in a body hug? Curious. Given such a position, you are exactly where I want you. *gives scalp massage*

You are awfully Glompy this Hive, GM.

And there was much rejoicing...

There's another waste of skin that would be an excellent tester of my Chipper-Shredders for a Better Tomorrow plan.

They've got bigger things to be cranky about...

I'm pretty sure bureaucracy can't allow something that simple and streamlined to happen.

So, you need an ICBM...(InterCONEtinental Ballistic Munchie).

Well, at least he hasn't been crucified, sprayed with honey, and covered in army ants. See, it can always be worse...

Best Musical Devil ever.