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Like a cleric?

It's called the Eldritch Theurge

Unfortunately for him, my next Saturday morning is free.

Smiting Spell: You can alter a spell with a range of touch to transfer its energy from your hand to a weapon that you hold. The next time you strike an opponent with that weapon, the spell discharges. The target takes the normal damage and effects of a successful attack in addition to the...

Don't forget trafficking illegal immigrants.

Please explain to this poor unfortunate soul that power notation is not generally used in Dungeons and Dragons. Maybe it was Improved Familiar? :p Such rapid character development. What more can you ask for in a player? To be fair, typhoons, thunderstorms, etc both occur over the sea...

Please show me this sheet.

Perhaps this gauntlet should consist of a tournament of champions who have their own friends and loved ones whose souls they want saved. The group which reaches the end of the gauntlet and conquered both monster and champion alike gets to have the soul they were after released, while all losers...

Ehh... adoption?

Actually, a lot of powergamers like Raven because it is the only familiar that can speak, which is worth a lot in terms of communication and skills such as Knowledge and UMD.

I like to throw in slavery, indentured servitude, and blatant corruption.

To be fair, theres plenty of wind on the high seas.

Greenfield, you must post his character builds as near as you can tell for us. I'm betting he gets them off of D&D Wiki.

Cannibalistic halflings

He could have at least said something about an adoption.

in 1e, I believe, Fighting-Men gained followers as they leveled up due to their martial exploits, so I can see where they're coming from, if I squint a bit. At any rate, it's politically inadvisable to anger someone who can wipe your country off of the map with a few hand gestures.

Newton's first law.

He sounds adoreable.