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Here, the local dog pound was giving away a free ziplock bag full of dog crap if you showed that you voted. I had no use for it, but hey, free dog crap!

Needs more cowbell.

Worst. Spammer. Ever.

In fairness, women didn't take the stage in Shakespeare's time, so it was necessary for men to play female roles. Also, the Monty Python guys aren't exactly playing women in a subtle, realistic fashion, are they? I think it would be kind of irritating if a guy roleplayed a female PC anything...

Running a 1e campaign. Loving it.

Ha, that reminds me of an incident in my campaign several months ago. The party was trekking through a swamp with a cultist prisoner, but he was a bit of a liability to their travel. They ended up tying him to a log and leaving him, with plans to come back for him as they left the dungeon...

:lol: Dude, I've been playing for 25+ years, and I'm running a 1e campaign right now - no need to instruct me on the background of earlier editions, thanks! I didn't say that modrons aren't part of the D&D canon, I said they're not sword-n-sorcery.

Yikes, I totally forgot about the five level higher with sword and lance thing! The races and classes from UA are totally off-limits for PC's in my campaign - like others have said, I just use it for the spells and magic items. Oh, and I use the expanded level limits and allowed classes per race...

Blah. They're stupid, and don't fit in with sword-n-sorcery.

And don't forget, of course, that a brand-new cavalier character could potentially start his career with (I believe) full plate armor and a heavy warhorse!

Jeez, you don't think it's reasonable for a gnome to be able to summon an earth elemental just by being a gnome? What a hardass DM you are! ;)

Not for Up The Garden Path, there isn't!

"It's like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black." -Nigel Tufnel

That's because you would cut your junk on their sharp edges if you tried.

Hey! If you've never read any Conan stories, go here now: A - M, Project Gutenberg Australia free ebooks ebook etext etexts Looks like the Gutenberg Project has a crapload of R.E. Howard's stuff up for the reading online. Although I've read a lot of the Conan stories, I've never gotten around to...

Mmmm - Delver has delivered a delicious batch of Truth! Well said, sir.

Oh, that was you who started that thread? In fairness, DF does state in no uncertain terms up front what topics aren't allowed. You knew better.

Are you serious?! The woman couldn't even feed her kid at the table because douchey players felt the need to act like obnoxious horny 15-year-olds? Ugh - how old are these guys?

Check page 5 of the Monster Manual.

The Master will not be pleased with your joke...