Risk vs. Reward
To cut to the chase, my question is this: does it unbalance the game to make all powers that have no effect on a miss Reliable?
And if thats true, why not make powers that do nothing on a miss Reliable? Or give 'em a recharge on 5-6 on a d6, or something--anything to avoid that feeling of "I just burned through my best resources and gained nothing!"
I'm on this big risk vs. reward kick today, I talked about rewards in the magic item thread. I'll talk about the single biggest problem with 4E in my opinion, and it directly relates to your question.
Critical failures can be just as defining as critical successes. They can be character defining, depending on the story. I still remember the time, in the chapel of Castle Ravenloft, I fumbled *two* saving throws in a row. Dead character, totally by accident, totally not by design. Damned inconvenient. But classic. Was I happy at the time? No. I was able to laugh it off though. And it changed the story quite a bit.
I think that our society today focuses too much on "everyone being a winner". This isn't how life works. This mentality leads to people not working as well as they could as a team in D&D. Everyone wants to be the one to do something totally awesome on their turn. The thing about victory is sometimes there is a loser, and that sucks. It sucked when you fumbled. I hear you. I've been there too.
I hear these stories about kids playing baseball and not keeping score and it makes me sad. Without competition and the possibility of loss, how is victory exciting? Why practice harder?
What some people don't realize though is that adversity builds character. I know that in my personal life, things have always come easily to me. It was like my life was blessed, and the world revolved around me. I'm finding in my late twenties, with three kids and a wife, that the world does not in fact revolve around me. Sometimes things don't work out the way I think they should. I am learning some of these life lessons the hard way. Now in a game setting, some people think that everything should work out their way, all the time. How fun is that?
Anyway, all of this is up to the game you are playing and if everyone buys in on this. Some people are completely happy with showing up at a game, getting their pellet, drinking from their water dish, and leaving. This is really why Living Forgotten Realms has gotten dreadfully boring to me, and why, in my opinion, it will never see the popularity or dedication that Living Greyhawk did. The risk is lower, and the rewards are bland. A lot of 4E games are like this too, because risk has been diluted, reward has been homogenized, and defeat is impossible because the DM is handing out encounters that the PC's always win. I do think that the powers that be in D&D have noticed this and are rectifying the situation.
I will suggest to you sir to drink down your bitter defeat. Let the acrid taste sit on your tongue a bit. Overcoming adversity is heroic because it isn't easy to do. When you fail, you pick yourself back up, and try again. And if you can succeed, well... that is the stuff legends are made of.