A waste of statistics and an illustrators time.

[alsih2o]

What is the most useless monster?

Let's try to stick the discussion to monsters we have all seen, aka The Real Turds of the Monster Manual.

There are over- and underpowered, borken, shafted and unfortunately-involves-psionics monsters, but I am looking for the stupid, insipid and never-to-see-use.

Takers?

 

[Piratecat]

I have a pet phantom fungus. His name is "Flumphy," and he's the cutest 'lil useless monster ever.

 

[dravot]

We were less than impressed by a rast, which was summoned by a trap that got triggered on a blown disable check.

 

[Henry]

Rasts, Tojanidas, Xorn, and most other creatures that are grossly asymetical and serve no real purpose that fifty other creature don't already fill.

Except Athachs. Cause they're cool.

 

[Abstraction]

Ethereal Filcher. The description for this monster should read "Your stuff is gone and you can't do anything about it. Nyah nyah."

 

[Krieg]

I have a pet phantom fungus. His name is "Flumphy," and he's the cutest 'lil useless monster ever.

I have one word for you....Lamisil.

PS - Naming your maladies is just darn creepy!

 

[diaglo]

Except Athachs. Cause they're cool.

except the text doesn't even mention the third arm growing outta their chest.


my useless nomination would be the will o wisp
edit: that is since they made green slime, rot grubs, and gas spores a trap and not a monster anymore. the will o wisp too should fall into that category.

 

[Arcane Runes Press]

The Phantom Fungus gets my vote.

A big, always invisible fungus that looks like a battletech mech carved from a sponge - but wait, instead of missiles, its big tubes shoot tongues.

But then, of course, those tongue things don't actually do a damn thing, they're just there in the picture.

And hey, it's not even a plant from "dimensions beyond our understanding." No, it's just a big plant that's invisible.

My theory is it developed invisibility out of a sense of shame.

Patrick Y.

 

[Rugger]

I gotta go with the Tojanda and Rast, myself. What were they thinking??

"You see a giant turtle-thing coming at you in the murky depths. With fins. And 2 extra arms....on its belly and back. And I think it has a mouth. And it wants to talk to you...."

Gotta defend the Xorn, though... had a memorable encounter with one that has shaped my view of them forever: nobody could speak Terran, so they asked what kinda noises it made...so now all Xorn's I run walk around saying "xornxornxorn, xorn!" guess you had to be there

-Rugger

 

[DMH]

The grey render, roper (the pic in the MM III was so much cooler than the write up), beholder*, grick, yrthak (sp?), windghost, mooncalf, gravecrawler, gravorg, and storm elementals (there is already the tempest) plus a bunch more.

*yes I know they are popular, but I think they are stupid none the less.