[AD&D Gamebook] The Sorcerer's Crown (Kingdom of Sorcery, book 2 of 3)

[Jfdlsjfd]

Commentary:

"Mignam flerol, lursip gravdam," Dalris says in the "spell language of the aboriginal Kandian druids."

The words of Dalris's Entangle spell are a neat touch. Some spells' verbal components are phrases in Common (well, English in my version of the gamebook), some are recognizable Fakus Latinus, and others are purely made up like in this example.

I failed to notice that, but it's the aboriginal Kandian druids. Your map was more accurate than I initially though. Who did colonize (Ti-)Kandia, for Kandian people to be aboriginal?

 

[Jfdlsjfd]

The archdruid Perth’s "manservant" [exact word in the book!] addresses us as "Magus Delling" and informs us that Perth and a visitor await us.

I don't have a problem with Perth having a manservant, TBH. His (foster) daughter is a princess.

Perth calls us his "tribal mage" and invites us to see who’s here. We recognize the visitor immediately. "His curly auburn hair and scraggly beard, bequests of some remote human ancestor, still seem almost comical against the smooth elven skin of his mother’s race."

So he was half-elven in book 1, and a horrible degenerate creature, half-elf, half (yuck) human in book 2 ? That's a step back in sensitivity.

This is Thayne, who was half-elven in book 1, but is referred to as elven in book 2. (Weird.)

Yes, but the purity of his blood is marred by some remote ancestor nonetheless. It only takes a single fault to taint your line. I gueuss after the meeting, they all will put on KKK masks.

We jokingly tell Thayne he’s "still uglier than any elf ought to be" before we embrace him. Thayne wears "supple russet doeskin" and has the "sinewy and hard" arms of "a fighter as well as a woodland sorcerer."

We're the kind sort of person, considerate an all. He isn't responsible of his mixed ancestry.

Thayne studies us and states that "half a decade has made you a man… but a pale one." He notes that magic has taken its toll on us, as it did with our father, and wonders what happened to “the mountain boy” he knew on Seagate.

He knew? We've met a Thayne, a drunkard with briefly talked to in back alley of Freeton five years ago and whom we left very quickly before he started begging ? How on earth can he recognize us? It's a trap.

 

[Joshua Randall]

Marla didn't die, but joined with the spirit ancestor of the Dellmer clan, and that Landor didn't die but disconnected with reality and entered an astral energy state, we can safely consider that nobody in our family is actually capable of dying.

It explains how we can keep going even after all those Your Quest Ends Here sections!

However, why shouldn't they eat enough?

The cliché is that the bookish apprentice is so engrossed in his studies that he forgets to eat. And, IRL, I did have one super, super, super smart friend who was like this. His parents literally had to remind him to eat.

So basically, as soon as we stopped belittling other students and teachers, our Charisma tanked?

You got it! Without other students to lord it over, we reverted to the unpopular nerd we always were meant to be.

So, why exactly don't they give us INT 15, DEX 11, CHA 13 and another 4 points to allo

I know, right? The more I read these character generation instructions in the here and now, the more I chuckle at how needlessly convoluted they are. Which actually perfectly fits the AD&D ethos….

Didn't she kill us in book 1 if we fumbled with her dagger?

True. Dalris is kind of bad mother — SHUT YO MOUTH!

I failed to notice that, but it's the aboriginal Kandian druids. Your map was more accurate than I initially though. Who did colonize (Ti-)Kandia, for Kandian people to be aboriginal?

Your guess is as good as mine! I honestly don’t remember if any of this ever gets cleared up. Given the book’s author is an anthropologist, I hope he is (was) going somewhere with all this. But we’ll see.

He knew? We've met a Thayne, a drunkard with briefly talked to in back alley of Freeton five years ago and whom we left very quickly before he started begging ? How on earth can he recognize us? It's a trap.

I would say that by implication, as part of Team Good Guys, Thayne got to know Carr in the years after the Sceptre of Bhukod was recovered. I mean — on OUR Carr Delling’s path, the College Arcane path, we indeed barely met Thayne. But one would presume that after Carr BAMFED out of the crypt with the sceptre, that he would meet up with Dalris and she would introduce him to the other members of the team: her father Perth; Thayne; and…

…

… hmm. This is small team.

Which makes it all the more inexplicable that in five years, they wouldn’t have done anything to have the new guy get to know one of the old guys.

 

[Joshua Randall]

68

Thayne explains that after Beldon bit it, everyone hoped that Haslum would take over the academy — Haslum being the Keeper of Scrolls and archivist.

[No, you're not senile: there is nothing in book 1 about Haslum as a character nor about Keeper of Scrolls as a bureaucratic position within the College Arcane.]

Unfortunately Haslum "vanished mysteriously nearly a year ago", and according to Thayne’s "sources" inside the academy, that may be because Haslum used a Gate spell to summon a demon. (Cool!) A demon would also explain the "great evil" that has befallen us in recent months.

We object that caution was Haslum’s middle name and he would never do something so risky. And besides, we’ve seen "very little mention" in dad’s spellbooks about demon summoning, and as we all know, if Landor didn’t write extensively about it in his books, it can’t exist and can’t hurt us, la la la we're not listening.

Then we ask about what we should’ve been informed of LAST YEAR, which is what is the "great evil" that Perth and Thayne apparently just started referring to today.

Thayne wants to know if we remember a "slight, very dark student. Beldon’s senior novice."

"Arno!" we shout. Well do we remember the "somber and malicious" student from our "brief stay" at College Arcane, who somehow became our "greatest rival" in that short timespan. We ask Thayne what Arno has to do with anything.

Before he answers, Thayne drains his tankard and signals for more mead.

Once the servant has left, Thayne whispers that things are worse than we know [which could mean any level of badness, because we don't know squat].

"The paladins have left their guard posts in the marshes, thus freeing the monsters they were guarding. Those evil creatures now control all of Seagate's ports, including Freeton. I had to sneak through their barricades to leave the island."

OK, that's pretty bad. Our interior monologue informs us that Seagate Island's strategic position in the strait known as Pirate's Alley "could" allow the eeeeevil monsters like gnolls and orcs to blockade the main Tikandian port of Saven. And the news that the paladins left their strategic positions in the swamps is shocking because the "Knights of Blessed Dyan" would never surrender those positions willingly.

We reiterate our question about what Arno has to do with any of this.

Thayne "believes" that Arno has found a source of eeeeevil magical power that rivals that of the Sceptre of Bhukod. With it, he can somehow control the paladin guards. And "even now" Arno is at the cathedral in Saven where he agitates for the archcleric to use the Holy Guard against the Kandia tribes.

Dalris jumps into the conversation to ask how that can be, because the Knights of Blessed Dyan derive their paladin mojo from being lawful good.

Thayne says that is the reason he's come to get us, because "the evil that Arno has summoned" to Seagate is stronger than Archcleric Oram's gods. According to Thayne, Haslum tried to combat Arno but "vanished in the attempt." Thayne wants us to use the Sceptre of Bhukod against Arno.

Perth asks why go to Seagate when the eeeevil has already spread to the mainland. Perth wants us to go to Saven to confront Arno there.

We contemplate for a while, and not just the paradox of how Arno can be in two places at once. [About which more below.] No, what we contemplate is something we have discovered about the Sceptre of Bhukod that no-one else knows -- something we have to reveal now, at the most dramatically cliff-hanger-y time!

Grab the edge of your seat before you turn to (103).

 

[Joshua Randall]

Commentary:

I actually do really like this plot dump, which does a great job of unloading a bunch of Capitalized Nouns that hint at a much more deep, rich, and expansive world than what we experienced in the previous book. There are paladins guarding monsters in swamps! Demons being summoned! Holy orders that may be corrupted! It's exactly the kind of portentious nonsense that I unironically enjoy in my fantasy fiction and D&D play.

However. There are so many, many problems here.

Unfortunately Haslum "vanished mysteriously nearly a year ago"...

Team Good Guys’ slow motion work continues. Nearly a year ago this Haslum guy vanished, possibly after casting a 9th level spell, but Thayne is just getting around to sharing this key intelligence now.

…and according to Thayne’s "sources" inside the academy…

Who are these mysterious "sources" that everyone has everywhere? This feels like lazy writing to cover for the lack of any legitimate reason that someone would either know or now know something. If they know it when they shouldn't, it's because of "sources". If they don't know it when they should, it's because of, I dunno, probably what we call 'magic' in Thayne's immortal words.

Haslum used a Gate spell to summon a demon.

Ohhhhhkay. Gate is a 9th level spell. It is up there with Wish on the list of game-breakingly powerful spells in AD&D. So the gamebook would have us believe that (1) the College Arcane has scrolls of 9th level spells just lying around and (2) the supposedly super-cautious Haslum decided that the best approach to whatever situation he found himself in was to Gate in a DEMON?!

Why would he do that? When you cast Gate, you get to specify to which plane you connect and the "specific being of great power" whose attention you attract. You cannot accidentally summon a demon when you mean to summon a deva or planetar or whatever the super-powerful good aligned creatures were in AD&D which are all mixed up in my mind with later editions but anyway it doesn't matter, they clearly weren't DEMONS.

So for Haslum to use a Gate scroll to summon a demon means either that Haslum is super, super evil and did this on purpose; or that Haslum somehow got mind-controlled or tricked into doing it.

Thayne wants to know if we remember a "slight, very dark student. Beldon’s senior novice." // "Arno!" we shout.

Recall that per The Story So Far, Carr took the learn-magic-with-Thayne path canonically. That means he never had any of the interactions with Arno that would cause them to butt heads and that would illustrate Arno’s sadism and malice. But that’s OK, because on this canonical path, during a brief stay at the college we somehow became great rivals with Arno anyway.

Also, dear readers, you now know one reason I chose the College Arcane path as OUR canonical path in book 1: so that I could show you the parts of that book that illustrate that Arno is a creepy psycho-killer-in-training. Otherwise Arno's introduction here in book 2 lands with all the power of a limp noodle.

Before he answers, Thayne drains his tankard and signals for more mead.

Second time the mead has been mentioned. Eh, I'm sure it's nothing.

Those evil creatures now control all of Seagate's ports, including Freeton.

That means the eeeeevil creature should also control the College Arcane, which is located in Freeton. Although we'll probably find out that the hordes of gnolls and orcs were unable to get past the Yellow Musk Creeper fence because they didn't have enough pole-vaultin' poles.

Seagate Island's strategic position in the strait known as Pirate's Alley "could" allow [...]
Thayne "believes" that Arno has found a source of eeeeevil magical power [...]

Argh, this kind of writing drives me insane. Don't be so wishy-washy with your "could" and your "believes". It's your plot! Anything you want to be true, is true. Don't use these weasel words that reflect uncertainty and doubt in a story that is painted in the bright colors of good vs. evil. We're not here to contemplate the hazy uncertain realities of the geopolitical situation based on possibly faulty intelligence. It's not that kind of story, at all.

Make your story big and bold and definitive!

• Whomever controls Seagate Island absolutely controls trade into Saven -- that makes this a way bigger threat than something that maybe might sort of be a problem.
• Arno has definitely positively found a source of eeeeevil magic power -- that makes him way scarier than someone who maybe might sort of have done that.

And "even now" Arno is at the cathedral in Saven
[...]
"the evil that Arno has summoned" to Seagate

WTF? Saven is the big important city on the mainland of Tikandia. Location of the Archcleric Oram's temple and former abode of Landor.

Seagate is the lion-infested island across the water. Location of the College Arcane.

They are not the same place!

It's possible that Arno summoned something eeeeevil while on Seagate Island, then left and went to Saven to convince the archcleric to send holy warriors against Team Good Guys. This would imply a past-present-future, normal world of cause-and-effect, like the one in which you and I live.

Except that we also get…

Thayne wants us to use the Sceptre of Bhukod against Arno [on Seagate Island].
Perth wants us to go to Saven to confront Arno there.

Aaaaargh! These cannot both be true at the same time. Arno cannot be in two places at once. (I know, I know: he's a ~~wizard~~ magic-user, so maybe he can. As cool as that would be, that's not the case here.)

The gamebook sets this up as some terrible dilemma we face about where to send ourselves. But it's completely insane because nothing about this choice makes any sense at all.

I almost wonder if the author got his S-named locations, Seagate and Saven, mixed up in his own mind. He might've thought he was plotting out how Arno did a thing in S-location and also did a thing in S-location, not realizing those are two separate locations!

Finally,

Thayne says that is the reason he's come to get us, because "the evil that Arno has summoned" to Seagate is stronger than Archcleric Oram's gods.

So first Haslum summons a demon and then Arno also summons some unspecified evil. That's a lot of summoning, and again it's bad writing. The plot can use any contrivances it wants. Don't use the same one back to back.

 

[Jfdlsjfd]

Side note: honestly, everything makes more sense if you consider that Saven and Freeton are the same place, on Seagate Island.

Thayne explains that after Beldon bit it, everyone hoped that Haslum would take over the academy — Haslum being the Keeper of Scrolls and archivist.

Unfortunately Haslum "vanished mysteriously nearly a year ago", and according to Thayne’s "sources" inside the academy, that may be because Haslum used a Gate spell to summon a demon. (Cool!) A demon would also explain the "great evil" that has befallen us in recent months.

OK, we missed a Checkov scrollkeeper opportunity, but why not. We don't explicitely get acquainted with the various red-robed guys, so it's totally possible he was the obvious successor to Beldon should something untoward happen to him.

But still...

1. The logical aftermath of Our Carr (a) crossing the Forbidden Door nobody could (b) taking control of the famed and immensely powerful Sceptre of Power which makes their magic useless (c) demonstrating its effect by returning Beldon's Death Spell on him is "Hi there, bald guys, I am the inheritor of the former owner who was usurped by late Beldon whose cinders you can see lying in my father, and now, MY office. I am the new master of this place. As there are still things I need to learn, like, for example, how to cast a spell since I failed all my lessons so far, I'll appoint a temporary manager. Also, we'll implement change since teaching is very bad here -- did I mention that you failed to teach us any spell ? -- mostly because you guys don't teach and delegate that to sociopathic 2nd year students. Ah, and I have a list of people to expel. It's a short list, actually..."

2. Admittedly, since we didn't take our canonical path in this book, Carr never enrolled, and for an external observer, he just broke and entered the academy, killed their benevolent headmaster without being able to explain any kind of evil plan he might even, let alone proove them, and fled after stealing a precious treasure of the Academy. So they were left to their own device...

But in this case, what are we told? "Everyone wanted to Haslum to take over".... "but unfortunately Haslum disappeared last year". We offed Uncle Beldon 5 (or is it 6 ?) years ago. It took them more than FOUR years to elect a new headmaster? How many round of vote do they have?

3. After the disappearance of their most power, 9th-level-spell-casting scrollkeeper, the other red robes decided that hand over the academy to a sociopathic apprentice instead of one of their own. Huh...

4. Thayne is the WORST character to have source in the academy. He was forbidden to appear and the security system was set up to warn if he even got near the gate. His backstory is totally not coherent with him having friends within the faculty, as Beldon would have removed them before as potential traitors.

5. Haslum summoned a demon. WIS 3 scrollkeeper probably needed his power for some kind of important thing like "I want to bind you to my service in order to discover where the stolen sceptre of Bukhod is, and where is Landor's son, the only person that could actually steal it from our tower". And he got, hum, outbargained. That I can see.

We object that caution was Haslum’s middle name

Despite not knowing him at all since we fled the academy after our heist in this reality.
Or despite not knowing him at all since we never encounter him or hear of him even if we do go to the Academy for lessons.

The author knew that he was writing a trilogy, didn't he? He could have just put ONE lesson for one of the spells taught by a benevolent teacher called Haslum, where failure doesn't make you die, and where he exhibits care for his students and is deeply sad at seeing our Carr fail to learn the spell, offering a remedial class in the next few days for those who failed.

Then we ask about what we should’ve been informed of LAST YEAR, which is what is the "great evil" that Perth and Thayne apparently just started referring to today.

Actually, in this reality, we have no reason to care about the Academy. Our job there was done once we learnt that the scrolls were in the glade and we recovered the sceptre of power. That we safely keep in our unguarded log shed while we go out hunting manticores. Some more exposition as to whether we should care for the Academy, Freeton or even Seagate Island would be in order.

Thayne wants to know if we remember a "slight, very dark student. Beldon’s senior novice."

I remember that one. He was killed during a Feather Fall lesson by a fellow student called Carla.

Before he answers, Thayne drains his tankard and signals for more mead.

Our interaction with this bum tend to confirm our first impression (where he offered alcohol to an underage children in a dark alley): he has a severe intoxication problem. Seriously, I can understand that being expelled from the Academy hit him hard, but he should get therapy or something...

"The paladins have left their guard posts in the marshes, thus freeing the monsters they were guarding. Those evil creatures now control all of Seagate's ports, including Freeton. I had to sneak through their barricades to leave the island."

Very organized monsters then, who can control a city, create barricade, and set up a network of influence over several ports to cooridnate regional piracy.

Why didn't the paladin just attack them during all those decades?

OK, that's pretty bad. Our interior monologue informs us that Seagate Island's strategic position in the strait known as Pirate's Alley "could" allow the eeeeevil monsters like gnolls and orcs

Tsssk, they are persons now.

Thayne "believes" that Arno has found a source of eeeeevil magical power that rivals that of the Sceptre of Bhukod. With it, he can somehow control the paladin guards. And "even now" Arno is at the cathedral in Saven where he agitates for the archcleric to use the Holy Guard against the Kandia tribes.

So basically, he knows nothing and is just making stuff up. Typical of a bum who want to stay a little longer enjoying our food and mead.

Dalris jumps into the conversation to ask how that can be, because the Knights of Blessed Dyan derive their paladin mojo from being lawful good.

Maybe they lost their mojo, girl? They are now the Knights of the Unholy Arno.

Thayne says that is the reason he's come to get us, because "the evil that Arno has summoned" to Seagate is stronger than Archcleric Oram's gods.

Reinforcing my theory that Landor's power made the god quake in fear more a sign of local Gods being extremely weak, more like minor faeries in our myth, than God as all-powerful creators of the universe.

According to Thayne, Haslum tried to combat Arno but "vanished in the attempt." Thayne wants us to use the Sceptre of Bhukod against Arno.

To butt his head with? The only canonical power of the sceptre is to bounce back spells to their caster. So if Arno is half as smart, he'll look at scrawny Carr and say "hum, so you oppose me? Well, duly noted, goodbye" (possibly just casting Shield should we threaten him with magic missile, after failing to "use" the sceptre against him?)


I agree with the commentary that a better sense of urgency would be created had the author been more affirmative... as in "shortly after your heist in Landor's tower, you vacated the place but didn't close the door behind you. One of the first students to show up was Arno, who got his hands on an artifact that was kept in the office, powerful even if not as powerful as the scepter, an Orb of Mind Control. Using it, he forced the benevolent scrollkeeper to summon a demon for him (and promptly fed the scrollkeeper to the demon) and won the election for headmaster position despite his very low academic standing. Everyone was shocked when it happened. Then, he turned his orb power on the knights paladin, and it worked so well that they abandonned their sacred vows... Now, he is en route to Saren to meet the Archcleric and possibly subvert the religion that is the basis of the social order of the whole of Kandia, outside of our few, forest-dwelling tribes. We must act quickly against him!"

 

[Joshua Randall]

everything makes more sense if you consider that Saven and Freeton are the same place, on Seagate Island.

It would clear up why Landor lived in Saven, yet built his academy in Freeton — if those are the same place, the “yet” disappears.

It would clear up why Carr vaguely remembers Beldon from visiting him one time in Saven. (I may not have quoted this from book 1, but it’s a thing.)

It would clear up why, when Marla fled with Carr from Saven, she didn’t go to Freeton — if those are the same place, then obviously you don’t flee location A to go to location A.

And of course it would clear up how Arno could need to be confronted at the academy in Freeton and also need to be stopped from chatting up Archcleric Oram in Saven at the same time — because if those are the same place, Carr can kill two birds with one stone.

Although we do know from one of our alternate paths in book 1 that we can get forced to make a choice between objectives even when those objectives are (supposedly) in the same location! I’m referring to how Carr wanted to get the spellbooks which he was repeatedly lied to and told were in Landor’s quarters, and Team Good Guys wanted Carr to get the sceptre which they thought were also in Landor’s quarters, so clearly Carr had to choose one and one only of those objectives to pursue because they’re both in the same location.

If Carr has to make a pointless choice when the two choices are in the same location by the book’s own insane anti-logic, then why not also force Carr to make a choice about which of two locations to visit that have the same person in both places at the same time?

We don't explicitely get acquainted with the various red-robed guys, so it's totally possible he was the obvious successor to Beldon should something untoward happen to him.

Out of all the insane anti-logic things to complain about in this series, “minor named character gets introduced and killed off in a few paragraphs of backstory” is way down the list. Lots of books do that. And it’s also a very RPG-ish thing we usually accept for the sake of a richer story.

So of course I’m going to pick at this minor harmless nit until it is bloody and raw.

"Hi there, bald guys, I am the inheritor of the former owner who was usurped by late Beldon whose cinders you can see lying in my father, and now, MY office.”

Well acccctttttually, we left Beldon’s body in the crypt with the thing. No body, no crime!

entered the academy, killed their benevolent headmaster without being able to explain any kind of evil plan he might even, let alone proove them, and fled after stealing a precious treasure of the Academy.

It’s actually more insane than that! According to this book’s The Story So Far, Carr (and Dalris) broke in, stole the sceptre, killed Beldon… and then Carr hung around for “a short time” — long enough to become rivals with Arno and, apparently, to get to know Haslum and Haslum’s character (he’s cautious).

We offed Uncle Beldon 5 (or is it 6 ?) years ago. It took them more than FOUR years to elect a new headmaster?

Why not? It takes Carr all day to read nine words, it takes Thayne a year to deliver critical intelligence, and it takes Team Good Guys fifteen years to search a small island.

the other red robes decided that hand over the academy to a sociopathic apprentice instead of one of their own. Huh...

Handed it over, or had it seized from them by force?

Thayne is the WORST character to have source in the academy. He was forbidden to appear and the security system was set up to warn if he even got near the gate.

Or maybe that makes him the BEST character to NEED sources inside because he can’t enter undetected. Of course, being detected doesn’t matter now that Beldon is dead, but everyone got super annoyed that the Magic Mouth would scream at Thayne every. Single. Day. Like a car alarm that keeps going off and after the first time nobody looks to see if the car is being stolen but the sound is still super annoying and OMG WHO INVENTED THIS INFERNAL MACHINE?!

The author knew that he was writing a trilogy, didn't he? He could have just put ONE lesson for one of the spells taught by a benevolent teacher called Haslum

Just for you, I will make a chart that shows who teaches each spell on the College Arcane paths in book 1. (I’ll need a little time to pull it together.)

Some more exposition as to whether we should care for the Academy, Freeton or even Seagate Island would be in order.

Yes, definitely! Except the book is at pains to leave our childhood a complete blank, a childhood that could have been used to build up our love for Saven (or Freeton?) where we grew up, our love for the Academy our father built, or our love for the rugged lion-infested beauty of Seagate Island. But none of that build up ever happens. Instead the first book starts when we are already a teenager.

The book does make a few attempts to back-date some backstory, though. For example, it tells us how nice Wendel was to us when we needed help, so nice that we respond by abandoning him to the tender mercies of a mob of superstitious peasants.

I remember that one. He was killed during a Feather Fall lesson by a fellow student called Carla.

I spat out my coffee laughing!

Our interaction with this bum tend to confirm our first impression (where he offered alcohol to an underage children in a dark alley): he has a severe intoxication problem.

Hmm….

Reinforcing my theory that Landor's power made the god quake in fear more a sign of local Gods being extremely weak, more like minor faeries in our myth, than God as all-powerful creators of the universe.

Fair. And a very cool part of the world-building of (Ti)Kandia. It feels like the kind of world-building an anthropologist author would do, right? Morris Simon knew from academic training that in the real world, tribes often had competing gods, and if your tribe got its butt kicked by some outsiders, that obviously meant the outsiders and THEIR gods were more powerful than YOUR gods.

 

[Joshua Randall]

Just for you, I will make a chart that shows who teaches each spell on the College Arcane paths in book 1.

I have delved deep into the bowels of the first book and emerged with the following data.

Cantrips	Section	Instructor	Notes
Exterminate	201	Arno
Tweak	29	Arno
Cough	n/a	n/a	on bookmark but not possible to learn
Hairy	96	Arno
Unlock	121	Arno
Weak Spells	Section	Instructor	Notes
Friends	22	Arno	roll 3 dice to learn!
Unseen Servant	38	Arno
Spider Climb	198	Arno
Feather Fall	91	Arno
Comprehend Language	70	Arno
Burning Hands	176	n/a	RTFM
Strong Spells	Section	Instructor	Notes
Armor	41	an older adept (nameless)	"red" robe is actually pink
Light	136	a young adept (nameless)
Detect Magic	223	Beldon	dweomer explanation
Read Magic	45	Haslum, oldest adept
Sleep	151	Arno
Find Familiar	4	Beldon

And, mea culpa, Haslum does exist in book 1.

He is found on only one extremely specific path: you have to go to the College Arcane, choose to skip Cantrips, not tell Beldon about Thayne (else you are offered the Weak Spells catalogue), and then roll a 4 to "choose" Read Magic.

At (45) we brag to Beldon that we are "good at languages", but Beldon redirects us to Haslum (probably because nobody wants to hear a 15-year-old brag about being good at anything) (at least anything we are allowed to talk about in polite company).

"Our Scroll Master, Haslum, is the instructor for this course," Beldon explains.

Beldon leads us up the stairs to the 15-foot-wide landing that contains the door to Landor's quarters and... the other door, which is "an airy, well-lit chamber" filled with "benches, shelves, and cupboards" all "stacked with an amazing variety of books, maps, and scrolls."

Scroll Master Haslum is a scholar and the oldest of the red-robed adepts. He hands us the clear crystal prism mounted in an ebony holder that is the material component for Read Magic, notes that the prism is "rare and costly" but promises that if we are good at this spell he'll reward us with one of our own.

INT test, target number 22, on a success (185) we get a long passage where Haslum teaches us Read Magic, very similar to the Thayne equivalent. Haslum gives us "a delighted smile" as we rapidly assimilate knowledge, and when we cast the spell, says, "Your father would be very proud of you. You may keep the prism, Carr. You've earned it." We learn the spell and gain +1 INT and +1 CHA.

On a failure (86), we admit to Haslum that we can't follow all his teachings and we need more sleep.

Haslum studies your strained face, then nods gravely. "You need more basic courses before you tackle one this demanding. Go back to your room and get some rest. Tomorrow you can ask Beldon to assign you to a different class." We don't learn the spell but there is no other penalty for failure.

So there we have it: Haslum did exist in book 1 and was a nice guy, especially compared to everyone else.

---

A few other things I noted in the table above.

• Cough: This cantrip is on the bookmark-slash-character-sheet, but it is not possible to learn it. It's not in the catalog of 1d6-2 (but just roll 1d4, sheesh) cantrips.
• Friends: When we attempt to learn this spell we are instructed to roll three dice and add to our INT. I have no idea if this is a typo or intentional.
• Burning Hands: Carr decides he doesn't need no stinkin' instructor and that he can figure this out via Read The Friendly Manual. On a failure, he get the gnarly explosion death I posted in the previous thread.
• Armor: the instructor here wears a "red" robe (irony quotes in the original) that is actually a subtle blend of pink and yellow, indicating his high status and power. That is EXACTLY the joke I made in the previous thread: that the most advanced students' robes should be PINK.
• Detect Magic: this section (223) has the book's explanation of dweomer: "A dweomer is the enchantment surrounding anything or anyone with active magical powers. The spell allows the caster to see the normally invisible dweomer." I do love that this definition is a triple tautology: "A [Middle-English word for magic] is the [magic] surrounding anything or anyone with [magic]."

---

Will I take back some of my rants about Haslum in this thread?

Goodness no! Have you learned NOTHING?

 

[Joshua Randall]

103

We tell everyone that the sceptre “may” not [more weasel words] be the answer our problems.

“Whutt doo yoooo meeeen? The Shhhepter is aweshhhhum!” Thayne slurs. Thayne is on his third mug of Kandian mead and his face is flushed with alcohol.

We say it would be easier if we showed everyone. (Of course.)

Perth fetches the sceptre from his sacred chapel. It is wrapped in “the tanned hide of a sacred hollyphant,” Perth explains, which will suppress the sceptre’s power as long as the bag remains tied. “Anyone may handle the sceptre safely while it is encased in this sheath, but its great power will be unleashed instantly if the cover is removed.”

We nod, unwrap our package, and feel it pulse when we touch it. Err, I mean, the Sceptre of Bhukod flares briefly, but its white light fades when we place the wand on the table. Everyone gasps at the beauty of our rod.

The famed object is fashioned of perfect silver and gold, with three large pearl-like spheres at its bulbous end and a row of hieroglyphic symbols engraved in a spiral around the shaft.

Our father Landor played his trap card such that anyone other than him or “his sole heir” who touches the sceptre will have his life force drained. In addition, its normal function is to absorb and reverse any spells cast upon the wielder.

We explain that we couldn’t translate the hieroglyphs on the shaft until a few months ago when Rufyl casually mentioned that it was Landor who inscribed them on the wand.

Dalris says what everyone is thinking, which is that as fascinating as this is, what does it have to do with confronting Arno?

We respond that once we knew it was one of dad’s codes, we translated it, and it reads, “Drink. More. Ovaltine.” No, sorry. It reads, “My trap card only has 30 charges.”

”Shooo whuttt?” Thayne wants to know.

Dalris gets it: once the charges are used up, anyone — good or evil — will be able to use the Sceptre of Bhukod.

We nod gravely. Dalris has the right of it: once the charges are used up, anyone can touch our staff, even if they’re not our dad or us. And we don’t have any way to know how many times the sceptre’s protective power had been used before we found it. So we shouldn’t be too anxious to use the wand. We should consider another way “to get Arno out of the academy.”

Thayne jumps to his feet, flushed with a combination of “elven ire and Kandian mead.” He calls us a female kitty cat and says if we’re too scared to touch our own wand, he’ll do it for us.

”DON’T, THAYNE!” Dalris yells, because she really does not want to see one man touch another man’s sceptre.

The drunken elf lurches forward and grabs for our sceptre’s “gleaming shaft”. The moment he touches our rod near its bulbous end, we explode! No, sorry. I got too excited there.

The moment [Thayne’s] hand clutches the enchanted weapon, it and he seem to explode in a blast of pure white energy. When the powerful dweomer fades, [we] see Thayne’s lifeless body lying sprawled across the table, his fingers inches away from the wand and his sightless eyes staring at the ceiling.

We’re too stunned by the death of our “old friend” to react. Perth and his servant grab Thayne and rush to Perth’s chapel where there may still be time to “enliven” Thayne if his spirit lingers.

Dalris sobs loudly, so we place our arm around her shoulders. [Aww!]

Arno’s evil has already spread to Wealwood and taken the life of a friend, we think to ourselves with “terrible anguish.”

(85) if we’ve changed our mind and now want to take the sceptre to confront Arno, or
(77) if we still think it would be safer to leave the powerful wand with Perth until we’re sure we need it.

 

[Joshua Randall]

Perth fetches the sceptre from his sacred chapel. It is wrapped in “the tanned hide of a sacred hollyphant,” Perth explains.

Prior to 2023, I would’ve been able to dazzle you all with my deep AD&D knowledge of weird monsters like the hollyphant. However, thanks to Baldur’s Gate 3, everybody knows and loves/hates the hollyphant.

That said, let me get this straight: Perth has the tanned hide of a lawful-good upper planes dwelling mini flying elephant. How? WHY?!

Was this one of our previous missions before Dalris got wind of things? And a good thing, too, if we skinned a hollyphant to wrap around our staff.

We explain that we couldn’t translate the hieroglyphs on the shaft until a few months ago when Rufyl casually mentioned that it was Landor who inscribed them on the wand.

We understand our father’s code well enough to translate it, but not well enough to recognize the writing until Rufyl brings that to our attention? How does that make any possible sense?

In real life, if I see an object with some Hebrew writing on it, I don’t forget how to read Hebrew until my dog reminds me that I can read it. As soon as OUR Carr Delling can read Landor’s code, then he should’ve been able to read the “hieroglyphs” at any time thereafter.

Although I do love the idea that Rufyl has had enough of this crap and refuses to volunteer any information until he absolutely has to.

It reads, “My trap card only has 30 charges.”
[…]
Dalris gets it: once the charges are used up, anyone — good or evil — will be able to use the Sceptre of Bhukod.
[…]
We don’t have any way to know how many times the sceptre’s protective power had been used before we found it.

Let’s do some advanced math:

30 charges
minus 1 dead (half-)elf ranger/wizard
equals 29 charges left

So all we have to do is keep anyone else from drunkenly fondling our sceptre and we’re good. Until we find Arno at which point we leave the wand on a table with a note that reads, “For free stew, touch me.”

OK, fine. I think the implication is that one charge gets used up every time someone touches the sceptre, including Carr. (Note the flare of white light when it was taken out of its dead-LG-flying-elephant-skin bag.) Still, Carr ought to know roughly how many times he’s handled his own sceptre in the last five years.

We’re too stunned by the death of our “old friend” to react.

Again with the “old friend” bit. We’re such good friends with Thayne that we haven’t seen him in five years and when we do, we make fun of his racial characteristics.

Arno’s evil has already spread to Wealwood and taken the life of a friend.

No it hasn’t! Thayne got drunk and grabbed the shaft of our mace-like rod-sceptre-wand, and he paid the price.

As a very harsh after school special lesson about why you shouldn’t drink too much, this scene works. As an illustration of Arno’s evil, it completely fails.