Amusing Cursed Items

[Interested2]

Lets compile a list of as many amusing cursed items as we can. In the grand tradition of such things, I'll kick it off:

1) Gem of Ineffable Self-Destruction
2) Cursed Belt of Gender Bending
3) Robe of Intestinal Duress
4) Bracers of Incontenince
5) Headband of Babble

 

[Galethorn]

6) Helm of helmet-hair
7) Necklace of proof vs. breathing
8) Cloak of proof vs. hiding
9) Dirty-dancing greatsword of suggestion
10) Apparatus of koala-itch

 

[Nyarlathotep]

6) Helm of helmet-hair
7) Necklace of proof vs. breathing
8) Cloak of proof vs. hiding
9) Dirty-dancing greatsword of suggestion
10) Apparatus of koala-itch

ROFL! Sadly I'm not creative enough to add to the list as I must maintain all my focus on not leaving work early.

 

[kolikeos]

2) Cursed Belt of Gender Bending

i think i saw this cursed item in the computer game baldur's gate

as for amusing cursed items:
earing of the eyeless (if you wear this earing, you become blinded, until a remove curse is cast an you)
greatsword of butt kicking (as long as the sword is held in ones hand, people at a range of 30 ft will come and kick your butt unless they make a will save)
scroll of atomic bomb (this looks like a scroll of a caster level 90 delayd blast fireball, but when one trys casting the spell it will be centerd on the caster atomaticly)
broom of ouching (you probobly guess where it 'ouches' )

 

[RangerWickett]

Elf Shoes. These function as boots of elvenkind, except that each time the wearer puts them on, he must succeed a Will save (DC 10), or else the tips of the toes curl up and sprout a little bell at the end. This in no way harms the wearer, nor does it give a penalty to move silently checks. It just looks silly.

 

[VirgilCaine]

There was a set of magic copper armor I read of once that was good, but it reduced your saves vs. electricity.

 

[moticon]

Counting elf shoes as 11..

12) Robe of static discharge. Wearer takes double damage from electricity and must make a reflex save DC 12 (14?) each time he touches metal to avoid 1d2 damage.

13) Headband of the Hip - This multicolored headband causes the wearer to use unconvential language, reducing diplomacy with the non-hip by a -2.

14) Flute of Dis'chord' - this appears as a fine instrument, but any bard that performs with it causes bickering and fighting to break out immeidately among all within 30' who do not make a will save DC 15.

15) Clifford's Dog Figurine - This figurine looks like a fierce wolf that might serve the owner on command, but once activated it becomes a medium size freindly red dog which follows it's owner performing no useful service except to bark at inconvient times and jump on the own any time spell casting actions are taken.

16) Murphy's Worry Stone - This small smooth stone has a "soft spot" on it, it seems to be a luck stone by all divinations, but once the wearer picks it up they must succeed at a will save 24 or carry it in one hand, worrying the soft spot with their thumb while worrying that "anything that can go wrong".

Moticon

 

[Hypersmurf]

15) Clifford's Dog Figurine - This figurine looks like a fierce wolf that might serve the owner on command, but once activated it becomes a medium size freindly red dog which follows it's owner performing no useful service except to bark at inconvient times and jump on the own any time spell casting actions are taken.

Medium? Dude, it's Clifford the Big Red Dog. He's Huge, at least.

-Hyp.

 

[sledged]

Elixer of Flower Breath
Belt of Gully Dwarvenkind
Candle of Melting
Promiscuity Belt
Robe of Acne
Figuring of Wondrous Power, Pumice Sloth

Dragon Mag had some great April Fool's cursed items. One of my favorites was the Dwarf Thrower (meant to be confused with the Dwarven Thrower).

 

[moticon]

Medium? Dude, it's Clifford the Big Red Dog. He's Huge, at least.

OK. we'll go with Huge... I thought about that but decided agin' it at first... You're pic tells it all.. I'm imagining my PC's wizard with his big red friend, Clifford...