....and the DM just gaped

[lonesoldier]

Psion Uncarnate

I took the Psion Uncarnate Prestige class and it gave my DM all manner of hell. Pit traps do not work. I can manifest decerebrate (Read: Remove brainstem) enough times to kill every person in any given city and I have some Metamagic/Psionic feat ripped from Complete Arcana (The twin spell thing) that lets me deal 10d4 every turn.

Of and I picked up an axe with my telekinesis powas and flung it into a psuedodragon, good times, good times.

 

[Brother Shatterstone]

Work's dead today, but should be picking up again tomorrow, so I don't know how long it will last....

Well, its always better than nothing.

 

[Nareau]

I've gotten similar reactions from players before.

PC is a chaotic neutral sorcerer who takes himself very seriously. He's dark, and mysterious, studying the myriad paths of the arcane. He wears dark robes all the time, reads books on demons, the whole works.

Well, after adventuring for a while, get earns enough money to commission a headband of charisma +2. The only person around who can make it is the priest of Pelor. He takes the commission, and the PC's hang out around town while it gets made.

Unfortunately for the PC, priests of Pelor are all about the brilliance of the sun. He gets the headband of charisma, and is rather chagrined to find that it's bright yellow, with a big shiny gold sun emblem on the front.

The look on the player's face was priceless.

Spider

 

[Nareau]

I've posted this before in similar threads, but here goes:
Vampire game, long ago. My character goes to meet the BBEG (Giovanni leader) in his 20th floor office suite. After some failed negotiation, I decide to tackle the BBEG through the plate-glass window. During the fall, I diablarize him while pumping all the blood into my Stamina. I survive the fall, BBEG gets dusted.

Spider

 

[Kai Lord]

back in 2E. We had a item we had to retrieve from a room guarded by a naga, we were in no shape to take on a naga, so the paladin throws open the door runs across the room grabs the item, the naga attacks him and misses he runs out of the room and we all run out of the building laughing our butts off.

LMAO.

 

[kigmatzomat]

back in 2E. We had a item we had to retrieve from a room guarded by a naga, we were in no shape to take on a naga, so the paladin throws open the door runs across the room grabs the item, the naga attacks him and misses he runs out of the room and we all run out of the building laughing our butts off.

Heh. The only plan my players have ever cooked up that survived contact with the enemy was "grab him." They needed a staff from a powerful half-demon so six people pile on him while the seventh ran away with the staff. He beat the crap out of them in the process but without his magic doo-dad they crushed him.

 

[Feyd Rautha]

As a player...

In my first DnD session ever I had a free reign with my character's alignment. I had read all of the alignments and given my character's background I thought he would be Neutral Evil. The GM (more experienced than I) said that it would be hard to do, but whatever. I came to the first session and sat there and did a spot on "neutral evil" in relation to the rest of the party and the events unfolding. He just stopped for a moment and was like...oh...so I guess you can play Neutral Evil

As a GM...
Well, I judge Living Greyhawk and even though it's supposedly "tame" I still have a minor fit whenever somebody drops any of the following (all of which have occured at tables I've judged)
...an armor class in the 50's
...a to hit roll with a mid 30's to mid 40's modifier (without True strike)
...200+ damage in a single round
...DCs for spell saves in the 30's

 

[Goddess FallenAngel]

We had a wizard once who won Initiative, then cast a twinned, maximized, Polar Ray spell, and rolled near max on the damage die. We were fighting a red dragon... that basically went away in a puff of steam before any of the rest of us had a change to touch it. It was quite amusing.

 

[Gwaihir]

I was the DM for this one about 5 years ago.
In a large dungeon crawl the players found a staff that was essentially a staff of power for clerics, flame strike, holy word, ressurrection etc. six or so functions, the party doesn't know what the staff does, but the six command words were engraved on the staff.

During the course of this adventure they managed to kill the BBEG, an evil priest whose death somehow figured in a prophecy for all the PCs being healed of some mysterious disease they all had contracted. After killing him they decided to continue to explore and loot the dungeon.

During this time, One of the characters, who the party had entrusted with the staff stayed with the body of the BBEG and proceded to try to test the staff, He used several of the healing functions on himself, but being healthy had no result, so finally he says

I touch the priests body and say the third command word.

Ressurection. I about died myslelf. The BBEG killed him, took the staff and ran out of the dungeon.

The same player had a 3rd level dwarf fighter attack a keep full of Goblins (100+) by himself because he figured he could only be hit with a natural 20. But we had just changed to 3E and several Goblins had fighter & monk levels.

 

[Shadrach_Storm]

So, I'm in a 1.5 edition (yes, that's not a typo) campaign with a high-level party (I run a dual-classed 9/12 dualist/psionicist), and the party was screwing around wasting time in a bar. To get things going the DM has this really large minotaur teleport in to attack us, and I laugh and obliviously say "As long as that's not Baphomet, this cow is toast." The DM cracks up, as the cow in questions is, in fact, Baphomet. Before I started in the campaign, one of the other players had previously drawn from a Deck of Fate and got the emnity with demonlord or archdevil card. Doh! Some lucky rolls with the Dispel Evil spell from our cleric got rid of him that day. Thus began my dualist's feud with Baphomet, no deck required.

Much later in the campaign during a fairly hum-drum gaming evening, my dualist was telling an npc the party met on an open plain about how he cut Baphomet's hand off in a previous fight (a lucky crit). The npc wasn't believing my story, so I started chanting "Baphomet" during the conversation. When the DM asked if my character was really doing that, I confirmed that yes he sure was. The DM had me roll percentile dice to see if I got any reaction from my chanting. The roll wasn't high enough. One of the other players holds his fingers to his head like little horns and says "Do the cow dance." So, I copy the gesture, hop around a little and continue chanting "Baphomet." That buys me another percentage roll, which was high enough, and d100 minotaurs (64 to be specific) show up among us on the plain. The npc finally believed my story, and we had an endless supply of beef jokes the rest of the night.