You all are just jealous. For eons my kinsfolk have lived under the craggy shelter of the mountains like lowly nerds or dorks in a "contemporary-highschool-setting", quietly doing the work of manyfold their numbers, while all of the brainless humans and elves swaggered around with all of the classy dames on their arms. Now that our hard work and self-sacrifice has begun to pay off, and our situation has begun to gleam positivity, you seek to soil and belittle our accomplishments.
Bah!! Go back to dwelling in mediocrity, you lousy humans.
You're all, like: " Ewwww! Look at ME! I'm pretty good at a bunch of things, but master of none! I act like everybody likes me, and that I'm the king of Damncool, but the truth is that nobody can stomach my presence and they only lead me on in thinking that I have talent and charisma! Isn't it SOOOO great being me? I'd listen to your response on that, but I'm too busy stealing other people's things and coopting their cultures! I'm so lusty that I have to breed like a cockroach to make sure that some of my damnable spawn manage to survive past a rat's life."
And the gutterbelly snapes known as elves are nay better.
They're all, like: "HaHAAAAAA!!! When you were busy building things from the stones of the earth we figured out how to make our homes using the least amount of work possible. That leaves us with ages of time to get absolutely NOTHING DONE!
We love swordplay and archery, because shooting someone from the darkness of the trees or stabbing them in the kidneys from behind with a thin blade that snaps when you pick it up wrong is ironically symbolic of our current LIFESTYLE! Oooohh!! You'd better be careful, acuz we're MASTERS OF MAGIC!
What's that? We can't use magic on it? Then I'll have NO PART in it. Let the lesser peons toil with the actual physical labour! I don't want to get sweat stains on my crushed velvet doublet and hose! DOn't you think that this leaf pattern is simply to DIE FOR? We live for ages and ages, and we kill more people from boredom than from our swords and bows. Who knows? We love the trees, and that makes sense, because the trees are incapable of screaming in rage at our pointless comments, and bashing our brains in to teach us some selflessness."
Filthy namby-pamby folk... Get a real job.
--Dwarves Rule, Elves Drool.