Are you a better person?

[Algolei]

No. What good qualities I have can be attributed largely to his steady, calm demeanor and good (if rouhg-edged) nature.

He's had longer to practice than I have though, and while I am well thought of by my peers, my old man is positively beloved by the people who know him.

Same here. My father was like unto a god among men, the miserable bastard. He taught Electrical Technology at a local community college. When he retired, they hired three people to replace him, and two quit because of their heavy workload.

And he grew up with everybody--used to be, whenever the news came on and somebody "important" was talking, my father would say, "Old [insert name here]. Y'know, we went to [insert place here] together."

Me, I don't know nobody.

Even at 75, my father is still teaching. As I understand it, every person working on elevators in Manitoba, NW Ontario, and parts of Saskatchewan had to pass a course he taught. I helped him by typing out the final exam....

 

[Arnwyn]

Guys: Are you a better man than your father?

What does "better" in this context mean to you? How do you feel about being better or not better than your parent?

Nope, I'm no where near better than my father. He is more understanding, more caring, more dedicated at what he does, more handy, and more talented. He is a fantastic role-model and the gold standard for what I should try to live up to.

A lot of the reasons why I'm the successful, well-adjusted, and very happy person I am today is because of him (though my mom helped a whole lot, too). Even then, I could only dream of being half the man he is.

 

[Henry]

I think my father was the better man. He worked from an early age (he was 13 when the Great Depression hit hard, and had to help support a family of about 7), he served in WW2, he supported our family with his single income, he gave me nothing but love, and he let me find my own way even when I was dammed ignorant about some things. My mom and he were an awesome team (she was the homemaker and the discipline in the family) and when she died, he had a much harder time raising me.

His biggest failings were that he had a hard time disciplining when it was called for, and he had a bit of the "Southern prejudices" that most of his peers had, though in practice, he was the most egalitarian man I ever met, hiring for ability and giving everyone a chance when they were down and out.

I loved him to death, and hope to be a tenth as loved and remembered by friends and family when I pass from this world.

 

[Quasqueton]

One of the things my father has always wanted more than anything else is for me to be "better" than him.

This was the thought that prompted me to ask this question.

I was thinking about my two (still very young) sons. I want them to grow up to be better men than me. My dad has said as much about his hopes for my brother and I.

If we aren't better than our parents, have our parents failed their goals?

Quasqueton

 

[Thunderfoot]

Wow, this is a doozy to try and answer.

My biological father walked out when I was one, tried to kidnap me and went on to father a string of other children with various women both married to him and other people. So am I better than he, yes. I have tried in everyway to keep my mind on task and to be committed to whatever ideals I hold too. He got married at 18 and was divorced by 20. I, on the other hand, married at 18 and am getting ready to have my 17th anniversary in OCT. I have always tried to stay as far removed from him as possible, but I found out that one of my best friends growing up was actually my half-brother, talk about shocking to a kid, I was 9 he was 7 and a half, my sister was 8, wait that math dosen't add up, uh-oh. :\

As for my step-dad, he tried, but we had different views on life and didn't see eye to eye on anything other than baseball and politics. Not really a good way to go through life, he divorced my mom after I left for the service and I've seen him only a couple times since then. I learned a lot about parenting from him and am having to unlearn most of it. Stern is good, totalitarian isn't. But, he took care of his responsibilites and stuck to his guns for the most part, and though I did fear him I didn't really respect him. So am I better than he? Maybe, in some respects yes, he was egotistical and hypocritical and mean spirited, but he meant well when the sun set. He did well for himself financially, and I can say that I haven't surpassed him that respect, but I'm trying.

My mom was the most stable source of anything in my life an I think the biggest male aspect in my life was proabably my uncle Tim early in life and my grandpa right before he died later in life. I still see my grandpa in my daughter's eyes and mannerisms and it always reminds me of where I can from, poor farmer stock with good old fashion horse sense and a strong sense of family first. So it's hard to stray from it when you are reminded everyday when this young blonde whisp goes bounding through the house whistling constantly but NEVER an actual song, I get it grandpa I won't forget. And no I not better off than either my grandpa or my uncle Tim, but I miss them both.

 

[Rel]

If we aren't better than our parents, have our parents failed their goals?

Quasqueton

No. We are not toy trains who, if wound properly and set in our tracks, toodle off to a predetermined destination. We have free will and after a point our lives are what we make of them.

If we don't turn out better than our parents, that doesn't mean that our parents failed any more than us overcoming a horrific childhood makes our parents a success. If we turn out poorly then I suppose that our parents may well be disappointed but that isn't the same thing as being a failure.

 

[BlackSilver]

Not so sure

Better then my Mom?

Not so sure. She travels the world, doing all kinds of charity work for AIDs, cancer, etc.

However she is very unaccepting of those that do not live as she thinks they should- those of other religion then her own need to get converted, things like that.

Me- I work in my own way to help others, volunteering at shelters (women’s, teens, and homeless), giving blood every two months, volunteering to help at walks and rallies (same thing she does, just on a smaller scale), along with a few other activities that I hope can make the world better.

After so many years of being judged by her morals it is hard to think she is better then I am, but after seeing what she has done around the world, its hard not to think she has some great qualities.