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CERAMIC D.M. (not the current one, a year old)
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<blockquote data-quote="alsih2o" data-source="post: 865689" data-attributes="member: 4790"><p>maldur (back from gencon)</p><p></p><p> barsoomcore-The first thing I had to think about when I read his story is Samourai Cat</p><p>in the real world , and I love samourai cat! Th surrealistic madness of</p><p>mixed times and concepts! fantastic!</p><p></p><p>NoOneofConsequence did add the additional difficulty of continuing his</p><p>earlier entry, but It did n't really work for me. Its a nice story, But</p><p>barsoom core had me laughing out loud on several occasions.</p><p></p><p> Barsoomcore for me!</p><p></p><p> alsih2o</p><p> </p><p> barsoomcore- this isn't what i expect from a ceramic d.m. entry, and i loved it. the story sounds</p><p>like the working mans complaints to me, and the bit about calling bees cracked me up. "useless stone lanterns" may now just be</p><p>a catchphrase in my little world. entertaining without sacrificing any story elements. i could have kept reading this for pages...</p><p></p><p> nooneof consequence- amateurish mercenary sees visions. i personally think no matter what happens in ceramic d.m. this story needs to eb continued in the sh forum. i really like what</p><p>you are doing with this.</p><p></p><p> in a close match, i have to go with barsoomcore.</p><p></p><p> mirthcard</p><p></p><p> I could go on and on about what I like in both of</p><p>these stories, but the real decision comes down to</p><p>what I don't like, so I'm going to focus on that in</p><p>both critiques, making them both shorter than normal.</p><p>I want you both to know that this was a hard decision</p><p>for me because I liked both entries so much. Okay,</p><p>let's begin. </p><p></p><p>barsoomcore:</p><p></p><p>Your comedic protagonist was at times funny and at</p><p>times annoying. It was hard to stay focused on the</p><p>story of an asian executioner when I kept hearing a</p><p>weird combo of Seinfeld and Shecky (sp?) Green in my</p><p>head. Also, I really can't stand opera or musicals, so</p><p>when you make reference to the Mikado, the score drops</p><p>slightly. </p><p></p><p>NoOneOfConsequence:</p><p></p><p>Ah, the return of Treffin. I'm not sure if you made</p><p>the right decision bringing him back or not, but</p><p>what's done is done. This story doesn't flow as well</p><p>as the last one and some of the use of the ingredients</p><p>seemed a bit forced. Also, the plot device of having</p><p>Treffin's older self talking to him (whether real or</p><p>hallucinatory) was a little contrived. </p><p></p><p>In an almost split decision, I give this round to barsoomcore.</p><p></p><p></p><p> looks like everyone like noones, story, but the round goes unanimously to barsoomcore!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="alsih2o, post: 865689, member: 4790"] maldur (back from gencon) barsoomcore-The first thing I had to think about when I read his story is Samourai Cat in the real world , and I love samourai cat! Th surrealistic madness of mixed times and concepts! fantastic! NoOneofConsequence did add the additional difficulty of continuing his earlier entry, but It did n't really work for me. Its a nice story, But barsoom core had me laughing out loud on several occasions. Barsoomcore for me! alsih2o barsoomcore- this isn't what i expect from a ceramic d.m. entry, and i loved it. the story sounds like the working mans complaints to me, and the bit about calling bees cracked me up. "useless stone lanterns" may now just be a catchphrase in my little world. entertaining without sacrificing any story elements. i could have kept reading this for pages... nooneof consequence- amateurish mercenary sees visions. i personally think no matter what happens in ceramic d.m. this story needs to eb continued in the sh forum. i really like what you are doing with this. in a close match, i have to go with barsoomcore. mirthcard I could go on and on about what I like in both of these stories, but the real decision comes down to what I don't like, so I'm going to focus on that in both critiques, making them both shorter than normal. I want you both to know that this was a hard decision for me because I liked both entries so much. Okay, let's begin. barsoomcore: Your comedic protagonist was at times funny and at times annoying. It was hard to stay focused on the story of an asian executioner when I kept hearing a weird combo of Seinfeld and Shecky (sp?) Green in my head. Also, I really can't stand opera or musicals, so when you make reference to the Mikado, the score drops slightly. NoOneOfConsequence: Ah, the return of Treffin. I'm not sure if you made the right decision bringing him back or not, but what's done is done. This story doesn't flow as well as the last one and some of the use of the ingredients seemed a bit forced. Also, the plot device of having Treffin's older self talking to him (whether real or hallucinatory) was a little contrived. In an almost split decision, I give this round to barsoomcore. looks like everyone like noones, story, but the round goes unanimously to barsoomcore! [/QUOTE]
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