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<blockquote data-quote="Cleon" data-source="post: 5514505" data-attributes="member: 57383">Let's see...Leomarhs are a race of planar animals apparently descended from lions or&nbsp; one of the other great cats.&nbsp; They can and do live well in uninhabited&nbsp; areas of other planes, although they are easily most common to the&nbsp; Outlands.&nbsp; Leomarhs are smarter than normal animals, showing an almost&nbsp; fiendish cunning, and are known to use ambush and hit-and-run tactics in&nbsp; their hunting.&nbsp; Leomarhs cannot be tamed, but are rarely the companions&nbsp; of rangers, druids, or those who have a strong affinity with animals.

&nbsp;&nbsp; Leomarhs have a hyenalike slope to their bodies, resulting from&nbsp; having larger forequarters than hindquarters.&nbsp; Their bodies are covered&nbsp; in small scales instead of fur, and their tails are long and snakelike&nbsp; and have a spade-shaped blade at the end.&nbsp; Their manes consist of dense&nbsp; golden-brown fur, and they have small patches of this fur along their&nbsp; legs and feet.
We don't need the second paragraph, since it's covered by the description. Does give me an idea for a few tweaks to the description though...As for the first paragraph. The bit about what planes they live in seems back-to-front. I don't think it needs the &quot;are known to&quot; bit. The &quot;rarely&quot; reads oddly to me, I prefer &quot;occasionally&quot;. Putting that together:This leonine creature has larger forequarters than hindquarters,&nbsp; giving its back a hyena-like slope. Its body is covered in fine scales&nbsp; rather than fur, although it still sports a mane of dense, golden-brown&nbsp; fur.&nbsp; Tassels of the same color line its legs and feet, which also match&nbsp; its small beard.&nbsp; Its snakelike tail terminates in a spade-shaped blade.&nbsp;Leomarhs are a predatory planar animals apparently descended from lions or&nbsp; one of the other great cats.&nbsp; They are most common to the&nbsp; Outlands, but can and do live well in uninhabited&nbsp; areas of other planes.&nbsp; Leomarhs are smarter than normal animals, showing an almost&nbsp; fiendish cunning, and use ambush and hit-and-run tactics in&nbsp; their hunting.&nbsp; Leomarhs cannot be tamed, but are occasionally the companions&nbsp; of rangers, druids, or those who have a strong affinity with animals.A typical leomarh is 6 to 7 feet long and weighs 300 to 450 pounds.&nbsp; &nbsp;Although intelligent, leomarhs do not speak or understand any language.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Cleon, post: 5514505, member: 57383"] Let's see... [INDENT]Leomarhs are a race of planar animals apparently descended from lions or one of the other great cats. They can and do live well in uninhabited areas of other planes, although they are easily most common to the Outlands. Leomarhs are smarter than normal animals, showing an almost fiendish cunning, and are known to use ambush and hit-and-run tactics in their hunting. Leomarhs cannot be tamed, but are rarely the companions of rangers, druids, or those who have a strong affinity with animals. Leomarhs have a hyenalike slope to their bodies, resulting from having larger forequarters than hindquarters. Their bodies are covered in small scales instead of fur, and their tails are long and snakelike and have a spade-shaped blade at the end. Their manes consist of dense golden-brown fur, and they have small patches of this fur along their legs and feet. [/INDENT]We don't need the second paragraph, since it's covered by the description. Does give me an idea for a few tweaks to the description though... As for the first paragraph. The bit about what planes they live in seems back-to-front. I don't think it needs the "are known to" bit. The "rarely" reads oddly to me, I prefer "occasionally". Putting that together: [I]This leonine creature has larger forequarters than hindquarters, giving its [COLOR=Red]back[/COLOR] a hyena-like slope. Its body is covered in fine scales rather than fur, although it still sports a mane of dense, golden-brown fur. Tassels of the same color line its legs and feet, which also match its small beard. Its snakelike tail terminates in a [/I][COLOR=Red][I]spade-shaped [/I][/COLOR][I][COLOR=Red]blade[/COLOR].[/I] Leomarhs are a predatory planar animals apparently descended from lions or one of the other great cats. [COLOR=Red]They are most common to the Outlands, but can and do live well in uninhabited areas of other planes[/COLOR]. Leomarhs are smarter than normal animals, showing an almost fiendish cunning, and use ambush and hit-and-run tactics in their hunting. Leomarhs cannot be tamed, but are [COLOR=Red]occasionally [/COLOR]the companions of rangers, druids, or those who have a strong affinity with animals. A typical leomarh is 6 to 7 feet long and weighs 300 to 450 pounds. Although intelligent, leomarhs do not speak or understand any language. [/QUOTE]

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