Alzrius
The EN World kitten
Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gamer (sung to the tune of "Damn it Feels Good to be a Gangsta"; with apologies to the Geto Boys)
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
A real tabletop gamer runs his char’ right
A real tabletop gamer never needs to check morale
‘cause real tabletop gamers don’t lose fights
His PCs always got the high stats
Showin’ his party that he rolls highs
But real tabletop gamers don’t point-whore
‘cause real tabletop gamers don’t optimize
And everything’s fun in the game of a gamer
‘cause tabletop gamers don’t complain
Play levels one-to-twenty, low up through the epic
‘cause real tabletop gamers all campaign
And all I gotta say to you
Domino, video, card-playin’, free-formin’ lamers
When the dice come out what the #$%& you gonna do?
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Drivin’ the plot, helpin’ out NPCs
Though all my stats were rolled random
Now I’m earning big XPs
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Beatin’ monsters everywhere I go
Ridin’ around town hittin’ pick-up games
Whackin’ monsters with my sword +4
Now tabletop gamers come in all race and classes
Some got killed while they played
But this gamer here is a smart one
Bought contingency to get me raised
Now all I gotta say to you
Domino, video, free-formin’, card-playin’ lamers
When your tournament ends what the #$%& you gonna do?
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
A real tabletop gamers get his wealth
Real tabletop gamers get the biggest of the treasures
Ask that tabletop gamer called Melf
Now monsters look at tabletop gamers as a challenge
And move into their combat roles
But get surprise on a monster grab your weapons and your spells
And end up pokin’ them full of holes
‘cause tabletop gamers be the game players
And everything’s quiet in their fort
A tabletop gamer sees a bad guy
And his partners in the party scry-buff-teleport
Real tabletop gamers don’t parlay much
All you hear is the clack of a die cast
And real tabletop gamers just roll to hit
‘cause real tabletop gamers make you die fast
Now when you in the game world makin’ crits role-play it
Fail a save against some GMPC shamer
But players like myself kick back and retrain
‘cause damn it feels good to be a gamer
And now, a word from the Game Master!
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Got it all set up behind my screen
Everything lookin’ good to the players ‘round the table
But none of them know I’m feelin’ mean
So every now and then I pick a player slap ‘im down
By fudgin’ just a die roll or two
And lettin’ a monster make its attack roll
So it can run that PC through
So players of the game keep respecting me
And you’ll be the game world’s star
But your actions better not upset me
Or level-drainings are in store
And for all those char-op threads which I have read
I’ll issue this disclaimer
They’re what a GM needs to run the PCs scared
And damn it feels good to be a gamer
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
A real tabletop gamer runs his char’ right
A real tabletop gamer never needs to check morale
‘cause real tabletop gamers don’t lose fights
His PCs always got the high stats
Showin’ his party that he rolls highs
But real tabletop gamers don’t point-whore
‘cause real tabletop gamers don’t optimize
And everything’s fun in the game of a gamer
‘cause tabletop gamers don’t complain
Play levels one-to-twenty, low up through the epic
‘cause real tabletop gamers all campaign
And all I gotta say to you
Domino, video, card-playin’, free-formin’ lamers
When the dice come out what the #$%& you gonna do?
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Drivin’ the plot, helpin’ out NPCs
Though all my stats were rolled random
Now I’m earning big XPs
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Beatin’ monsters everywhere I go
Ridin’ around town hittin’ pick-up games
Whackin’ monsters with my sword +4
Now tabletop gamers come in all race and classes
Some got killed while they played
But this gamer here is a smart one
Bought contingency to get me raised
Now all I gotta say to you
Domino, video, free-formin’, card-playin’ lamers
When your tournament ends what the #$%& you gonna do?
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
A real tabletop gamers get his wealth
Real tabletop gamers get the biggest of the treasures
Ask that tabletop gamer called Melf
Now monsters look at tabletop gamers as a challenge
And move into their combat roles
But get surprise on a monster grab your weapons and your spells
And end up pokin’ them full of holes
‘cause tabletop gamers be the game players
And everything’s quiet in their fort
A tabletop gamer sees a bad guy
And his partners in the party scry-buff-teleport
Real tabletop gamers don’t parlay much
All you hear is the clack of a die cast
And real tabletop gamers just roll to hit
‘cause real tabletop gamers make you die fast
Now when you in the game world makin’ crits role-play it
Fail a save against some GMPC shamer
But players like myself kick back and retrain
‘cause damn it feels good to be a gamer
And now, a word from the Game Master!
Damn it feels good to be a gamer
Got it all set up behind my screen
Everything lookin’ good to the players ‘round the table
But none of them know I’m feelin’ mean
So every now and then I pick a player slap ‘im down
By fudgin’ just a die roll or two
And lettin’ a monster make its attack roll
So it can run that PC through
So players of the game keep respecting me
And you’ll be the game world’s star
But your actions better not upset me
Or level-drainings are in store
And for all those char-op threads which I have read
I’ll issue this disclaimer
They’re what a GM needs to run the PCs scared
And damn it feels good to be a gamer
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