Every once in a while you meet the Perfect Gamer. Not the guy who plays a game perfectly or has perfect knowledge of a game’s rules, but the guy who is perfect to play any game with. What makes the Perfect Gamer? Let’s see if we can figure it out.
1. To the Perfect Gamer all games are relatively equal. It doesn’t matter what game is on the table, the Perfect Gamer is willing to give it a try. Even if it is a game in a genre he knows he doesn’t like, the Perfect Gamer will still give it a shot because he knows that this could be the one that changes his mind. Everything gets a fair shot to be unique, interesting and, most of all, fun.
2. The Perfect Gamer has fun. If a game turns out not to be unique, interesting, and most of all, fun, more often than not, he’ll still find a way to enjoy it in spite of itself or find an element of it that is interesting. No game ever completely fails to have value when the Perfect Gamer is playing.
3. The Perfect Gamer doesn’t care about winning. In fact, winning is merely a pleasant bonus compared to the fun of actually playing a game with friends. Crushing defeats are equally as good as stunning victories as long as the joy of game play has been shared with those at the table.
4. The Perfect Gamer is humble. When he wins he doesn’t gloat or rub your face in it. There is an understanding that without everyone else participating, there wouldn’t have been a game to win. The Perfect Gamer treats a victory as something to be happy about, but not something to make everyone else to feel bad about.
5. The Perfect Gamer is hopeful. Losing isn’t the end of the world. He doesn’t pout, accuse, blame or excuse. If he lost, he is happy for someone else to have won. He identifies his errors or faults and owns them so that the next time he plays the game, he plays better.
6. The Perfect Gamer is a Sportsman. No game played, whether won or lost, ends without a kind word and a handshake -- regardless of how his opponent has behaved. The worst player gets the same treatment as the best. No one leaves the Perfect Gamer’s table without being acknowledged and thanked, because the perfect gamer knows that without that other player there it isn’t a game.
7. The Perfect Gamer knows the rules. It’s not that he knows all the rules to all the games ever, but rather that he listens when new games are being explained and asks questions to clarify what he doesn’t understand. When he has a rule question he either takes the time to look it up himself or asks someone who has more experience. He doesn’t simply bumble around and hope for the best.
8. The Perfect Gamer shares. If he knows something you are about to do might be a problem later, he politely explains why what you are about to do might not be the best course. If a vital piece of information is necessary to playing, he gives it willingly so that everyone can play better. If there is a special rule governing a particular circumstance, you’ll know about it, too. He never takes advantage of what he knows and you don’t. He wants to be fairly challenged by the people playing.
9. The Perfect Gamer isn’t afraid to play at his best. He doesn’t believe in hollow victories for others because he pulled his punches. He understands that isn’t really fun for the winner. He doesn’t take advantage of new or inexperienced players, but he does help get them up to speed so they can play as well as they are able. If a game has a ‘best position’, to start from, he’ll put the new guy in it and then challenge himself to not only help you play better, but see if he can learn something new as well. You’ll win because you earned it, not because it was handed to you.
10. The Perfect Gamer’s game doesn’t end when the game does. Instead, he takes the time to share his thoughts and impressions of the game, to discuss strategy used by him and against him, to point out what he liked about the game and where it can improve. He is interested in hearing what you thought of the game as well and will spend more time listening to you and thinking about what you said than he will talking himself. If he didn’t like a game, he’ll say so and explain why, but he won’t blame you for having played it.
11. The Perfect Gamer respects taste. He knows not all games are for all people. It’s okay that you don’t like a game he brought, or that he didn’t like a game you brought. If you like a game he doesn’t, he isn’t going to mock you for it. Neither is he going to make fun of you for not liking a game he does. People are different and want different things from their games. It’s all good as long as people are playing and having fun.
12. The Perfect Gamer doesn’t care who or what you are. Religion, race, creed, color, sex, sexual orientation, politics, etc. None of these matter to him. At the game table only two things matter: Can you play and are you fun to play with? Distinctions separate people and the Perfect Gamer is all about bringing people together to play and enjoy themselves. There is no room at his table for people who don’t understand that as well. There are no girl gamers or guy gamers, there are just gamers.
13. The Perfect Gamer understands balance. Life gets in the way sometimes and that’s okay. If your responsibilities mean that you can’t be a regular attendee that’s fine. You’ll be just as welcome as ever when you can play. He doesn’t hold it against you if an unexpected change in your plans means you have to miss out. Do what you need to do and he’ll see you next time. It’ll be just like you never left when you get back.
14. The Perfect Gamer communicates. Is he going to be late? It won’t be a surprise to you. He’ll pick up the phone and let you know just as soon as he can. You won’t be holding the start of a session for him if he is going to be really late; he’ll insist you get started without him. He doesn’t think anyone else’s fun should have to be ruined by his tardiness. When he gets there, he’ll slide right into place and things will carry on with as little disruption as possible.
15. The Perfect Gamer facilitates. Even if the game isn’t in his own house, the Perfect Gamer goes out if his way to help supply food and drinks. He shows up early to help get things set up and stays a little longer to help clean up. He treats your house at least as good as if it were his own. At the game store he helps straighten up the chairs, tables, terrain and whatever else you have used. If a mess is made he helps clean it up. He leaves a place cleaner than he found it.
16. The Perfect Gamer treats your games as if they were his own. Pages are never folded or torn, models and miniatures are treated gently, game bits are never abused. He’ll help you bag bits and keep track of pieces. He is careful with food and drink and always keeps them well away from the game pieces. If a piece is damaged he can repair it or help replace it. He is respectful of the time and money you’ve put into a game.
17. The Perfect Gamer tries to grow the hobby. New people are always welcome at the table. Curious bystanders are enlightened. Events are created or attended that bring folks on board. As far as the Perfect Gamer is concerned, the more people involved in the hobby the better. He’ll have more people to play against and have fun with in the long run.
18. The Perfect Gamer is encouraging. He wants you to try new things, both at and away from the table. He thinks you CAN do it, if you want to, and there is no reason not to try. Feeling particularly bad about a defeat in spite of yourself? The Perfect Gamer will go out of his way to make you feel better and to help you overcome it. He sees it as his duty to try to make sure that as many people as possible are having fun.
19. The Perfect Gamer cares about you outside of the game as well. You become his friend simply by playing games with him. Once you are a friend, he takes an interest in your life away from the table. Things going rough for you? He’ll offer whatever help he can. Things going great? He’ll celebrate along with you.
20. The Perfect Gamer shares. Books, knowledge, time, paints, miniatures and himself. He wants you to play and makes sure you have the means to do so. If that means you have to borrow a rule book for a week to make a character or read up on a game, so be it. If you can’t get into the tourney unless your figs are painted, he’ll make it happen. Confused by a rule? He’ll explain it. Need a ride to game night? He’ll pick you up. He loves helping because it means more playing, more gaming and more fun.
Perfect Gamers are hard to come by. Most people never meet one, though they can turn up almost anywhere playing almost any type of game. For most of us, striving to be a Perfect Gamer is about the best we can hope for.
I am by no means the Perfect Gamer. It has, however, been my privilege to know one for the last 12 years. Sadly, he was taken away from us last week. There is a great sense of loss in the local gaming community and we all agree that it is unlikely we will ever see his like again. This list is built on those qualities he exemplified to us all. There isn’t a gamer in our area who hasn’t interacted with him on some level. Through him, we all became, and continue to become, a little closer to being Perfect Gamers ourselves.
1. To the Perfect Gamer all games are relatively equal. It doesn’t matter what game is on the table, the Perfect Gamer is willing to give it a try. Even if it is a game in a genre he knows he doesn’t like, the Perfect Gamer will still give it a shot because he knows that this could be the one that changes his mind. Everything gets a fair shot to be unique, interesting and, most of all, fun.
2. The Perfect Gamer has fun. If a game turns out not to be unique, interesting, and most of all, fun, more often than not, he’ll still find a way to enjoy it in spite of itself or find an element of it that is interesting. No game ever completely fails to have value when the Perfect Gamer is playing.
3. The Perfect Gamer doesn’t care about winning. In fact, winning is merely a pleasant bonus compared to the fun of actually playing a game with friends. Crushing defeats are equally as good as stunning victories as long as the joy of game play has been shared with those at the table.
4. The Perfect Gamer is humble. When he wins he doesn’t gloat or rub your face in it. There is an understanding that without everyone else participating, there wouldn’t have been a game to win. The Perfect Gamer treats a victory as something to be happy about, but not something to make everyone else to feel bad about.
5. The Perfect Gamer is hopeful. Losing isn’t the end of the world. He doesn’t pout, accuse, blame or excuse. If he lost, he is happy for someone else to have won. He identifies his errors or faults and owns them so that the next time he plays the game, he plays better.
6. The Perfect Gamer is a Sportsman. No game played, whether won or lost, ends without a kind word and a handshake -- regardless of how his opponent has behaved. The worst player gets the same treatment as the best. No one leaves the Perfect Gamer’s table without being acknowledged and thanked, because the perfect gamer knows that without that other player there it isn’t a game.
7. The Perfect Gamer knows the rules. It’s not that he knows all the rules to all the games ever, but rather that he listens when new games are being explained and asks questions to clarify what he doesn’t understand. When he has a rule question he either takes the time to look it up himself or asks someone who has more experience. He doesn’t simply bumble around and hope for the best.
8. The Perfect Gamer shares. If he knows something you are about to do might be a problem later, he politely explains why what you are about to do might not be the best course. If a vital piece of information is necessary to playing, he gives it willingly so that everyone can play better. If there is a special rule governing a particular circumstance, you’ll know about it, too. He never takes advantage of what he knows and you don’t. He wants to be fairly challenged by the people playing.
9. The Perfect Gamer isn’t afraid to play at his best. He doesn’t believe in hollow victories for others because he pulled his punches. He understands that isn’t really fun for the winner. He doesn’t take advantage of new or inexperienced players, but he does help get them up to speed so they can play as well as they are able. If a game has a ‘best position’, to start from, he’ll put the new guy in it and then challenge himself to not only help you play better, but see if he can learn something new as well. You’ll win because you earned it, not because it was handed to you.
10. The Perfect Gamer’s game doesn’t end when the game does. Instead, he takes the time to share his thoughts and impressions of the game, to discuss strategy used by him and against him, to point out what he liked about the game and where it can improve. He is interested in hearing what you thought of the game as well and will spend more time listening to you and thinking about what you said than he will talking himself. If he didn’t like a game, he’ll say so and explain why, but he won’t blame you for having played it.
11. The Perfect Gamer respects taste. He knows not all games are for all people. It’s okay that you don’t like a game he brought, or that he didn’t like a game you brought. If you like a game he doesn’t, he isn’t going to mock you for it. Neither is he going to make fun of you for not liking a game he does. People are different and want different things from their games. It’s all good as long as people are playing and having fun.
12. The Perfect Gamer doesn’t care who or what you are. Religion, race, creed, color, sex, sexual orientation, politics, etc. None of these matter to him. At the game table only two things matter: Can you play and are you fun to play with? Distinctions separate people and the Perfect Gamer is all about bringing people together to play and enjoy themselves. There is no room at his table for people who don’t understand that as well. There are no girl gamers or guy gamers, there are just gamers.
13. The Perfect Gamer understands balance. Life gets in the way sometimes and that’s okay. If your responsibilities mean that you can’t be a regular attendee that’s fine. You’ll be just as welcome as ever when you can play. He doesn’t hold it against you if an unexpected change in your plans means you have to miss out. Do what you need to do and he’ll see you next time. It’ll be just like you never left when you get back.
14. The Perfect Gamer communicates. Is he going to be late? It won’t be a surprise to you. He’ll pick up the phone and let you know just as soon as he can. You won’t be holding the start of a session for him if he is going to be really late; he’ll insist you get started without him. He doesn’t think anyone else’s fun should have to be ruined by his tardiness. When he gets there, he’ll slide right into place and things will carry on with as little disruption as possible.
15. The Perfect Gamer facilitates. Even if the game isn’t in his own house, the Perfect Gamer goes out if his way to help supply food and drinks. He shows up early to help get things set up and stays a little longer to help clean up. He treats your house at least as good as if it were his own. At the game store he helps straighten up the chairs, tables, terrain and whatever else you have used. If a mess is made he helps clean it up. He leaves a place cleaner than he found it.
16. The Perfect Gamer treats your games as if they were his own. Pages are never folded or torn, models and miniatures are treated gently, game bits are never abused. He’ll help you bag bits and keep track of pieces. He is careful with food and drink and always keeps them well away from the game pieces. If a piece is damaged he can repair it or help replace it. He is respectful of the time and money you’ve put into a game.
17. The Perfect Gamer tries to grow the hobby. New people are always welcome at the table. Curious bystanders are enlightened. Events are created or attended that bring folks on board. As far as the Perfect Gamer is concerned, the more people involved in the hobby the better. He’ll have more people to play against and have fun with in the long run.
18. The Perfect Gamer is encouraging. He wants you to try new things, both at and away from the table. He thinks you CAN do it, if you want to, and there is no reason not to try. Feeling particularly bad about a defeat in spite of yourself? The Perfect Gamer will go out of his way to make you feel better and to help you overcome it. He sees it as his duty to try to make sure that as many people as possible are having fun.
19. The Perfect Gamer cares about you outside of the game as well. You become his friend simply by playing games with him. Once you are a friend, he takes an interest in your life away from the table. Things going rough for you? He’ll offer whatever help he can. Things going great? He’ll celebrate along with you.
20. The Perfect Gamer shares. Books, knowledge, time, paints, miniatures and himself. He wants you to play and makes sure you have the means to do so. If that means you have to borrow a rule book for a week to make a character or read up on a game, so be it. If you can’t get into the tourney unless your figs are painted, he’ll make it happen. Confused by a rule? He’ll explain it. Need a ride to game night? He’ll pick you up. He loves helping because it means more playing, more gaming and more fun.
Perfect Gamers are hard to come by. Most people never meet one, though they can turn up almost anywhere playing almost any type of game. For most of us, striving to be a Perfect Gamer is about the best we can hope for.
I am by no means the Perfect Gamer. It has, however, been my privilege to know one for the last 12 years. Sadly, he was taken away from us last week. There is a great sense of loss in the local gaming community and we all agree that it is unlikely we will ever see his like again. This list is built on those qualities he exemplified to us all. There isn’t a gamer in our area who hasn’t interacted with him on some level. Through him, we all became, and continue to become, a little closer to being Perfect Gamers ourselves.
