Sialia
First Post
In answer to the question "where did you come up with this?"
1. Staring at the pictures and banging my head on the keyboard, of course.
2. I figured I'd written enough depressing stuff this season, and tasked myself with producing comedy. Since I wasn't feeling comedic, I decided to imagine how Piratecat would have written the voice of the guy in the sunglasses. It cheered me up immensely to hear him talk. After I got him talking, I just set him down in the world and let him go.
3. The comment about "nice balloon" "beats the alternative" "yeah with the alternative you don't get a balloon" I lifted verbatim from something I overheard through a cube wall in my office recently.
4. I watch too much FoodTV, and this was the sort of business they'd have done a spot on.
5. Most of this story was written while sitting at an extremely noisy birthday party my daughter the Scampering Chaos was attending. The posting time for this set could not have been worse for me.
6. When I found out what the picture of the trees was about, I derailed completely, and almost didn't finish. I would have needed several more hours to prune back from where that train of thought went.
Bandeeto gave me two other comments about the story that I thought were helpful but didn't have any time to work on. The first was that he really wanted to know how the wife died. If I'd had time to explore that, there probably would have been enough development to make this thing count as an actual story (as in, oh now I understand how we got here, or, oh now I understand what's going to happen next.)
His second comment was that this seemed like an opening monologue to a much longer novel. It's a set up to something, but just what we don't know yet.
Which gives me three pretty consistent views of the thing. Thank you for your insights. I liked this piece enough, it might be worth revisiting at some point.
1. Staring at the pictures and banging my head on the keyboard, of course.
2. I figured I'd written enough depressing stuff this season, and tasked myself with producing comedy. Since I wasn't feeling comedic, I decided to imagine how Piratecat would have written the voice of the guy in the sunglasses. It cheered me up immensely to hear him talk. After I got him talking, I just set him down in the world and let him go.
3. The comment about "nice balloon" "beats the alternative" "yeah with the alternative you don't get a balloon" I lifted verbatim from something I overheard through a cube wall in my office recently.
4. I watch too much FoodTV, and this was the sort of business they'd have done a spot on.
5. Most of this story was written while sitting at an extremely noisy birthday party my daughter the Scampering Chaos was attending. The posting time for this set could not have been worse for me.
6. When I found out what the picture of the trees was about, I derailed completely, and almost didn't finish. I would have needed several more hours to prune back from where that train of thought went.
Bandeeto gave me two other comments about the story that I thought were helpful but didn't have any time to work on. The first was that he really wanted to know how the wife died. If I'd had time to explore that, there probably would have been enough development to make this thing count as an actual story (as in, oh now I understand how we got here, or, oh now I understand what's going to happen next.)
His second comment was that this seemed like an opening monologue to a much longer novel. It's a set up to something, but just what we don't know yet.
Which gives me three pretty consistent views of the thing. Thank you for your insights. I liked this piece enough, it might be worth revisiting at some point.