Funny stuff said at the gaming table

[WayneLigon]

"I call on the Dark Side." Said by a Jedi in the Star Wars Game.
"Me too." The other jedi

Had this happen to me in one of the first Star Wars games I ever played. Myself and another guy are fleeing stormtroopers. We manage to lock down a door, but they blow it from the other side. Fire and scrapnel race towards us. It's obvious we're both going to be in a world of hurt from this. I say 'My the Force be with us....'. The other guy says 'I call on the Dark Side'. The flames immediatly all divert from him on to me. Flashsizzle.

 

[twofalls]

My team was interviewing a street kid decker in a restaurant during a Shadowrun game who I described as wearing his baseball hat on backwards. The team doctor (a very dry humorless type of character that the player runs wonderfully) was heard telling the Street Mage, "How can we trust this child when he genuinely lacks the technical skills necessary to operate a hat correctly."

Well, it was hysterical the way he said it.

 

[CM]

"You're a 6th-level ranger now. Don't you get manyshot?"
"Money shot? What's that do!?"

another, just happened only hours ago:

me: "Guys, don't retreat yet. We can take down that ogre mage if we crit him a few times!

the very next actions:

Jay (cleric1): (rolls "20", "18", crits with warhammer): "24 damage"
Pat (cleric2): (rolls "20", "17", crits with battle axe while enlarged): "52 damage"
Eric (DM): well, he'll be down for a while.

 

[Krieg]

At the bottom of a deep dungeon, in a room drow were just seen fleeing from, the party enters and hear a voice, in a deep movie-trailer booming voice, "Are you the Keeper?"

The halfling PC "innkeeper" rogue replies, "Yes I Am!"

Sounds like somebody learned a lesson from Ghostbusters!

 

[TheAuldGrump]

Heh, in a Call of Cthulhu game, while one of the characters is off talking with the GM, off on a recon mission.

Player 1: So, how many times do you think he'll get shot?
DM in other room: Bang! Bang! Bang!
Player 2 (me): Sounds like three...

The Auld Grump, the PC involved always took unnecessary risks...

 

[ecliptic]

This was years ago.


We see kobolds flying in on drakes (i think). Well they were wielding hand crossbows and everyone was running for cover.

Player: "They're only kobolds."

That player died shortly after failing a saving throw against poison. A kobold stuck him with a quarrel.

We still make jokes about it, and a bard song about that character is still heard throughout inns.

 

[blargney the second]

"You're a 6th-level ranger now. Don't you get manyshot?"
"Money shot? What's that do!?"

*lol*

 

[Wild Gazebo]

I have no idea what the context was, but from last Saturday...

"Of course this bacon's kosher, I made it out of a priest".

Ok, this one had me rollin'!


The jedi one made me think of this:

I was playing a nefarious smuggler shopping with my jedi companion. I was inquiring about some new parts for my beloved ship when the dealer gets this strange look on his face and decides he needs to do something in the backroom. I get all antsy, thinking about the 250000 cred bounty on my head...hop the counter draw my blaster and wait for the guy to come through the door aiming at head level with my finger masaging the trigger.

<player running the jedi> Ok, I'm done shopping. I leave and go back to the ship.

 

[Tric]

"I start throwing plates at the ninja" Feng Shui

I accidentally read that as "I start throwing pirates at the ninja", lol...

 

[Samothdm]

"Where do these stairs go?"
"They go up!"
(I think that one happens every session).

In the voice of the John Rhys Davies character 'Salah' from Raiders of the Lost Arc: "Orcs. Very dangerous. You go first."

Tiefling Soulknife character, peeved at another PC, to the DM: "Should I make a Will save to see if I attack her?"

Wizard PC uses enlarge on fighter PC during battle with a werewolf. Fighter PC brings down the werewolf, who reverts to its natural humanoid form.
DM: "Before your eyes, the fallen werewolf transforms into a beautiful female half-elf."
Player: "Is she naked?"
DM, hesitating: "Well, yes. Her clothing was ripped to shreds when she transformed into a werewolf."
All male players, pretty much in unison: "I get enlarged, too!"

Tons of others, but I'm gettin' tired...