I need good dwarf jokes!

[ArcOfCorinth]

Refer to him as the "bearded gnome."

 

[DM with a vengence]

"What's up? Not you!"

"Damn, I appear to have run out of throwing daggers, someone pass me that dwarf."

"I don't quite see the point of ale. Isn't it just wine from stuff that could've been planted for grapes."

"Even the smallest sapling can reduce rock to gravel, what's so special about you?"

"Axe, meet fireball."

"You know they say that people who carry around big weapons are compensating for something..."

"That hair is matted enough to provide an additional +1 to Armor Class."

 

[Tolen Mar]

(Tolen wipes some dust off this one...)

"We dont have to outrun the monster, We only have to outrun the dwarf!"

 

[madriel]

their was a good thread about a dwarf bard who had back jokes. Perhaps a community supporter can do a search and find it for us? It would be great to re-read that thread

That was for Piratecat's story hour. Can't remember which page it's on though.

 

[GMVictory]

More name calling

Stuntie (not original, I know)

Gopher

Mole

Gravelbrain

Dirt Farmer

Rock Polisher

Chip

Pebble

Crackhead

Rubble

 

[Emirikol]

I saw my dwarf neighbor outside the carriage house the other day.
"Jump in," I said. "I'll give you a lift home."
"[Screw] off," he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful bastard," I thought as I buttoned up my backpack and continued my walk.

 

[Hand of Evil]

Ever wonder why dwarves have such big nostrils, just look at their fingers.