D&D General I want to fire a player.

Reynard

aka Ian Eller
Supporter
I love the player. We have been friends for literal decades. He brings creativity to the game.

But -- with that creativity he brings all kinds of problems. First of all, due to personal issues he randomly doesn't show up (we play VTT) but even worse when he doesn't the game is better.

He is slow with the VTT and always must build the most complex character possible so it's always a chore when his turn comes up.

It's so hard. Ugh.
 

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I love the player. We have been friends for literal decades. He brings creativity to the game.

But -- with that creativity he brings all kinds of problems. First of all, due to personal issues he randomly doesn't show up (we play VTT) but even worse when he doesn't the game is better.

He is slow with the VTT and always must build the most complex character possible so it's always a chore when his turn comes up.

It's so hard. Ugh.
Have you talked to him about the issues?
 


The only player I ever had to fire was for reasons that were so clear, the guy never showed up again so I didn't actually have to fire him. Which was good, because I was hosting, but not running, the game.

For this, it has to be tough. Maybe just don't invite him to the next one?
 


I love the player. We have been friends for literal decades. He brings creativity to the game.

But -- with that creativity he brings all kinds of problems. First of all, due to personal issues he randomly doesn't show up (we play VTT) but even worse when he doesn't the game is better.

He is slow with the VTT and always must build the most complex character possible so it's always a chore when his turn comes up.

It's so hard. Ugh.

These are always tough, especially with friends.

I remember I had a friend back in college.

Great guy and he loved to game. Problem was, when gaming, he turned into a complete jerk. It was really odd, you could watch movies with him, go out, just about anything and he was great to hang out with. But game, he turned insufferable.

After many, many chances - we finally just stopped inviting him to game with us.

In this particular case.

1. If the personal issues are such that he had to miss? Well, life first. But make sure his character is one that can come in and out;

2. Directly ask him to play something less complicated, blame it on the VTT of that makes it easier, but explain time is limited. Or, if being that direct is out of the question? Impose a reasonable but firm time limit at the "table." Have everyone establish a default action (for ex Dodge) that happens if an action isn't declared by the time the time limit is reached. I'm not a huge fan of this, but desperate times and all that.
 

I love the player. We have been friends for literal decades. He brings creativity to the game.

But -- with that creativity he brings all kinds of problems. First of all, due to personal issues he randomly doesn't show up (we play VTT) but even worse when he doesn't the game is better.

He is slow with the VTT and always must build the most complex character possible so it's always a chore when his turn comes up.

It's so hard. Ugh.
If it's just him being slow perhaps assign another player to do things for him on the VTT and to give him a suggestion if his decision making gets really slow. Having me run the roll20 character sheet for my wife and occasionaly provide suggestions works really well (those things are a pain to use on the ipad IMO).
 

That sucks. It’s a bad place to be.

I’m lucky in that I have multiple groups, but one of them is a life-long family and close friends game. Literally the people who brought me into gaming almost 40 years ago. Trouble is, the style of many of the players is diametrically opposed to mine. If they weren’t family, I would have bailed decades ago. I view that group a bit differently that any other. When we play it’s not about the game, it’s about throwing dice with friends and family. The play style differences still drive me up the wall, but I put up with it because they’re family.

I said all that to say this: sometimes you put up with things in game because the people are worth keeping around and/or hanging out with. Especially if not gaming with them will cause problems in real life.

I’ve been playing RPGs for almost 40 years. I have yet to find a game that’s worth losing a friend over.
 

I'd say, discuss it with him first. Randomly not showing up is the biggest issue. Tell him, 3 strikes and you're out. At the very least a player should notify the group that he can't play today and why. Real life stuff can always come up, and it is okay to cancel D&D for something unexpected. But it shouldn't happen that often, and for expected things use an agenda. Our group has a Discord channel where we discuss when we can all play. If you know you're going to have to cancel, this lets you inform your group in advance, and it allows the group to reschedule.

Taking too long with your turn is a minor problem imo. Discuss a way to speed things up. Maybe by having some prewritten actions for him?

As a last resort, when this campaign is finished, don't invite him to the next one.
 


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