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Message: <blockquote data-quote="BookTenTiger" data-source="post: 8071809" data-attributes="member: 6685541">So despite my light teasing above, I honestly commend you two for bringing this up. It's an interaction that can feel annoying and doesn't have an obvious, emotionally-satisfying solution. And since [USER=7024209]@MikalC[/USER] called me Miss Manners in another thread, I'm going to go ahead and give this my best shot. Feel free to ignore my advice!When my students are struggling with the rules of social situations, I often teach them the very difficult skill of assuming positive intent.That is, when someone acts in a way you do not understand, assume they are acting through good intentions instead of ill.This can be very, very difficult, especially on the internet where we don't have facial features, gestures, or body language to communicate context!The situation you two are proposing is an emotionally tough one. In an argument or a debate, often the person with the "final word" gets something of a victory, even if it's just an emotional victory. They get to say "I rest my case," wipe their hands slowly and dramatically, and walk away into the sunset. If you've just spent eight pages trying to convince them to change their opinion, it's a really frustrating way to end a conversation.So in this case, I would say assume positive intent.I can imagine a lot of reasons someone might say "I'm done with this conversation." They might be feeling frustrated, persecuted, uncomfortable, tired... or they might feel like they want the final word! Or they might want to silence my side of the conversation! The truth is I can't know because I am looking at their words on a screen in another corner of the world and I can't cast Detect Thoughts at such a range. (Oh Detect Thoughts, how many awkward situations in real life would you have rescued me from???)So if I cannot 100% know the intent behind someone saying they're done with a conversation, then I have to assume positive intent. I have to assume they have a good, positive reason for ending the conversation, rather than a negative one. And if I assume their intent is positive, then I have to honor that request.And that's been a message from Miss Manners.Over.</blockquote>

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