Late Night Ramblings


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well if you don't want to say it I will. It's midnight here, late enuff.

I came up with an invention today that is going to make me rich: poseable chocolate cake action figures.

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If I told you that Aliens were invading and the only way to stop them from coming and taking over the world and putting all of mankind in slavery for a billion years and whipping us with barbed wire and doing bad things in general and the only way to stop them involves removing one of your ears and no I don't have proof but it was really true...would you poke yourself in the eye?

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one time at band camp I jammed a trombone in my arse and played taps

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my car's vanity plate says IMNAKED and I drive without a shirt on

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god I want attention

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right about now, you're probably thinking "does this guy ever say anything worth the electrons flying out of my computer screen?" In response I have 2 words: "Eat Me". On a more serious note, I actually have 15 words: "You know that hole? the one you put pie in? yeah, that one. shut it."

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anus

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There, in a gloomy hollow glen, she found
A little cottage built of sticks and weeds,
In homely wise, and walled with sods around,
In which a witch did dwell in loathly weeds
And willfull want, all careless of her needs;
So choosing solitary to abide,
Far from all neighbors, that her devilish deeds
And hellish arts from people she might hide,
And hurt, far off, unknown, whomever she envied.

--Edmund Spenser, The Faerie Queene, (1590)
 

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