If people are going nuts over the wishlist, what's going to happen when they read James Wyatt's discussion of players' taking on director's stance on p 28 of the DMG?Spatula said:In that sense I do think that it's saying, "take wishlist, give candy," but there's nothing wrong with that.
Anyway, I don't really understand the outrage. Magic items in D&D are, like feats, skills, class features etc, a crucial part of character build. AD&D 1st ed emphasised the random component of character build: random stats, random hit points, random spells at 1st level, etc. Every edition of the game has reduced that degree of randomness and increased player control over character build. The 4e DMG is just continuing with that trend.
As for the complaint "How can I rationalise it in game that the PCs keep finding what their players want for them?" well, use whatever technique you use to rationalise that these people are the only ones who never die in combat, that there is always trainging available for whatever new spell or feat the player wants his/her PC to pick up, that these are the only Dwarf and Elf in the world who are friends and not enemies, etc.
Generating story explanations to support metagame-driven decision making is a pretty standard part of running any RPG that has a metagame (of mainstream RPGs, the only two I can think of that are virtually metagame free are RQ and Classic Traveller).