(OT - but too funny to miss!) Monty Python and the One Ring

Alyx

First Post
Goto: Monty Python: The Fellowship of the Ring

And read. And laugh. And get weird looks from those in the same room as you.

excerpt:

Elf #1: Hey, weren't you supposed to be traveling with a wizard?
Frodo: Yes!
Elf #1: Well, where is he?
Frodo: He has fallen in a horrible and epic battle with the foul Balrog of Moria.
Elf #1: How did he manage to escape from Isengard to begin with?
Frodo: What does it matter? We have traveled since the snows of fury covered the mountains, through the mines of Moria, through--
Elf #1: Where'd he catch up with you?
Frodo: In Rivendell.
Elf #1: At Elrond's? In Rivendell? All the way from Isengard?!?
Frodo: What do you mean?
Elf #1: Well, it was simply to far to travel in so short of time!
Frodo: The eagles may fly south with the sun or the dragons or the ravens may seek warmer climes in winter yet these are not strangers to our land.
Elf #1: Are you suggesting wizards fly like eagles, that they migrate?
Frodo: Not at all, they could be carried.
Elf #1: What -- an eagle carrying a wizard?
Frodo: It could grip him by the arms!
Elf #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A hundred pound eagle cannot carry a hundred and eighty pound wizard.
Frodo: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel that Frodo Baggins of the Shire is here.
Elf #1: Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, an eagle needs to beat its wings thirty-two times every second, right?
Frodo: Please!
Elf #1: Am I right?
Frodo: I'm not interested!
Elf #2: It could be a northern eagle!
Elf #1: Oh, yeah, a northern eagle maybe, but not a regular southern eagle, that's my point.
Elf #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that...
Frodo: Will you please ask your Lord and Lady if they will aid us in our quest?!
Elf #1: But then of course northern eagles don't go far from their nests.
Elf #2: Oh, yeah...
Elf #1: So one wouldn't have gone all the way to Isengard anyway...
[Frodo and the remaining members of the fellowship walk past the arguing elves in disgust and proceed on without them]
Elf #2: Wait a minute -- Supposing two eagles carried a wizard together?
Elf #1: No, they'd have to have it on a line of some type...
Elf #2: Well, simple! They'd just use a strand of creeper!
Elf #1: What, held under the dorsal guiding feathers?
Elf #2: Well, why not?

I'll say no more :)
 
Last edited:

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It's even better with all the pictures from the movie. Somehow makes it more plausible.... Even the credits are great:

J.R.R. Tølkiën's: Fëløwshipti uv den Råingen
 


Morrus said:
Moved to the new forum created especially for this sort of thing! :)

Morrus, the fastest thread mover on Earth, again in action!
Be afraid, OTer, Morrus is back on action...

:D
 

Thank you, oh great and mighty Morrus, for saving me from my faults.

Figures that the first thread I'd create on these boards would end up in the wrong place at the wrong time. Almost drives me back to being a proper lurker, darting in posts with furtive looks, afraid someone would catch me...

Almost.

But I'm addicted to the power of thread starting now. THE POWER! You'll never cow me! Muwhahahahahahaha!

Back to your regular scheduled posting.
 





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