I'm moving up in the world, figured I could use a few titles... henceforth, I may be refered to by any of the following prestigeous titles:
Under Secretary General of The Impersonal Enlightenment Fellowship, David Carl Weaver XIII
Constable of The Satanic Altar of Bone Society, David Carl Weaver, Ph.D.
Friar-In-Training of All Things Not Pertaining to The Black Forest, Reverend David Carl Weaver
Greater Caliph of Most Every Random Act of Violence, David Carl Weaver, The Ubiquitous
Cleric of Cannibalistic Rituals to the Glory of Jupiter, David Carl Weaver
Sheikh of The Black Army of Satanic Altars of Bone, David Weaver I
or
Secondary Alderman of The Impersonal Enlightenment Fellowship, David Carl Weaver