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[Press] Corporia RPG - posting a 4 page intro PDF

Mark Plemmons

Explorer
I've just posted a little 4-page PDF that's an 'in-game' document from my upcoming Corporia RPG's setting, and would love some feedback. It serves as a bit of an introduction, and hopefully should whet some appetites. :) You can find other previews on the blog, too. Any commentary is appreciated (and you can sign up for email notices whenever I blog, if you want to stay updated)!

Corporia: What the Flux. | The Brabblemark
 

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scourger

Explorer
It's an interesting premise, from what I can gather from the pdf. There may be too much history that throws off the narrative. One paragraph about the Authurian history should be enough to set it up and then move into the setting-day events. If it is a future-modern RPG with resurging fantasy elements, I hope those are integrated simply but compellingly. Drawing from a couple of other recent threads there, more Savage Worlds style than d20 mode. I also think a kickstarter would be a great way to get the project going.
 

Mark Plemmons

Explorer
Thanks for the comments. I have tweaked the narrative slightly to flow more easily. This is still the 'alpha' playtest, and I'm hoping that a Kickstarter in early April will be my 'beta' test to polish everything up.
 

Wild Gazebo

Explorer
You’re obviously invested in the story. And you want other to be as well. The best way to do that is not to give them as much info as possible in a short space. That will turn people off and you will shoot yourself in the foot. People now-a-days need to be teased into investment.

I would suggest ignoring a history description and instead use implied imagery (that most people recognize anyway) in short action sequences. A kind of gestalt method of introduction...so people are intrigued but still need to fill in the (easily-pieced-together) blanks.

I would suggest a report is a poor way to introduce an exciting topic. Perhaps torn fragments of a report, newspaper headlines and clippings, magazine covers, abrupt net reports, or even epitaphs.

Hope that helps.
 

Mark Plemmons

Explorer
Wild Gazebo,

Thanks for the comments.

I understand what you're saying. I've thought about how best to balance between the 'tease' and 'too much' factual information. Since what I've been posting on my blog are essentially 'open alpha playtest content', the intent is both to get feedback and interest.

Many of the earlier blog posts were much shorter concept previews; this was the longest one and so perhaps was okay to be this detailed. Or perhaps not.

I'm curious about other peoples' thoughts, if you're reading this thread. Do you prefer more hints or full disclosures?
 

Mark Plemmons

Explorer
I would suggest a report is a poor way to introduce an exciting topic. Perhaps torn fragments of a report, newspaper headlines and clippings, magazine covers, abrupt net reports, or even epitaphs.

Oh, there are definitely lots of these within the book. I believe I've posted at least two of them (1 and 2) on the blog.
 

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