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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Kahuna Burger" data-source="post: 2532426" data-attributes="member: 8439">Random comments....The comments on "pc" vs manners were pretty telling. I think for some people, its all about "do it my way." They believe that their way is the right way, and those who stray from it - by not saying "sir" or "maam" or by expecting them to change something they say - are wrong. Thats not politeness, that's ettiquette. Thats about a man paying a check for a woman, and the woman thanking him in the right words. Not about picking up the check one time and letting someone else pick it up the next regardless of gender, or being gracious whichever side you fall on. In the midwest, they will please and thank you and hold the door on their way to vote you out of your civil rights because you're 'different'. Down south they send very courteous and 'correct' emails asking for your help in enforcing their religion on public school children. Sure its possible to have both manners and tolerance, but if I have to choose one, I'll take the tolerance.I think if you are judging politeness by specific phrases, or modes of address, or a heirarchy of who opens the door, then yes, polite society is doomed. Personally I judge it by general consideration and acknowlegement (verbal or non) and while there's room for improvement, I think things are going ok.Here's a snapshot of modern politeness.... A young woman (me) is standing on a subway train on her way to work, as are several men. A single seat opens up. Everyone stays standing, glancing around. If one of us spots someone with packages or a child or an older person, we gesture to the seat. If not, we all sort of stand there, akwardly unwilling to be the one who takes the seat, but equally unwilling to make someone else the "weaker" one who needs the seat. So the seat stays there until the next stop and gets filled in the bustle of more people leaving and getting on. Its odd and funny in retrospect, but it has a politeness to it....</blockquote>

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